Miss Passion (1984) Review

Miss Passion (1984) Edited Poster 

Well, it was time to leave the 1990s and get back to the 1980s for another video that features some stars from the past. This time around we are going to 1984, and we are going to be reviewing a movie that was directed by Suze Randall. The movie was distributed by Vidco Entertainment, and stars a great deal of men and women that you may know about or may not know about. The stars of this movie include, Crystal Breeze, Peter North, Lisa De Leeuw, Howard Ziehm, Rachel Ashley, Craig Roberts, Ginger Lynn, Traci Lords, Rikki Blake, Craig Roberts, Steve Drake, Susan Hart, Paul Baressi, Steve Powers and Greg Rome. All of these people are involved in this one, and if you’re a fan of any of them, you may want to seek this out. I must say, before going forward with the review, that Traci Lords was in this movie, and I was able to garner a copy from Japan when visiting. In the United States, you may not be able to find this at the retail level, although ebay, and other platforms do sell this movie from used sources. New copies are extremely rare, unless you are going overseas and they have a lot of them.

The movie opens up with the director. She is hosting a show, and this show is about who is Miss Passion. The opening is funny, and it has an interesting premise and set. The set is a bed, on a stage with lots of lighting. We are introduced to the judges and it’s interesting to see how it all works out. This is like a real game show! It gets 1 star from me just for creativity, and good acting up front. But what about the rest of the movie? Well, here we go, let’s see how this all pans out, as it is a game show, in a porno movie, from 1984.

I must note that the bed in the center of the stage is a blow up mattress. I also must note that this is game show like rules with each performer having live sex for the judges.

The first major contestants start to kiss and make out a bit. The two are Peter North and Crystal Breeze. North has a difficult time getting too hard with Breeze’s first initial blow job but eventually gets there, and then goes into sex with her. Breeze is a tall brunette with medium size breasts, and moans loudly for North. North is in work mode here, there’s a lack of passion overall. The music is a trivial jazzy piece that sounds a lot like you would expect from a 1980s game show. Breeze’s moaning gets louder as the two engage in doggy style and it’s a good sequence of pushing at one point, but it’s obvious that the bed is not that grand. They get the job done, and the director stays with the action for the most part. They go through several positions while editing show Lisa De Leeuw and Howard Ziehm having sex on a couch as the judges. The sex goes for a while and in reverse cowgirl, Breeze and North finish up with a money shot on Breeze’s pubic region for the finish. Breeze is loud, but it was obvious that North was just phoning it in for the most part. Not sure why, but Breeze just didn’t do it for him or something. They give the two a 9.99 and we are back to the host.

They introduce a new woman and this time she is a tall, thin brunette with large natural breasts. She has good makeup, and n Egyptian style outfit. Out comes Craig Roberts to have sex with her. Craig Roberts and Rachel Ashley get on the blow up mattress and start to have sex immediately after a little oral from Ashley. This is a slow moving scene, with Ashley barely moaning at times. Here large breasts are nice to look at, and her frame is nice, but the two have this slow moving sexual chemistry that is just odd considering this is supposed to be a contest and porno at the same time. The music is turned down a little, and we see the action for the most part while Ashley wears a blue skirt. There’s a few positions here and there but eventually Craig Roberts cums by yelling and masturbating onto Ashley’s pubic hair and region. That’s the end. It’s a lackluster scene with minimal noise, moaning, and chemistry. They give the performance a 9.25.

We are introduced to two new women, and this time it’s Ginger Lynn and Traci Lords. This is not a terrible sequence of events, and the judges start to go at it while watching. Traci Lords and Ginger Lynn work well together here, slowly and passionately kissing and having oral sex. The music is terrible, but the sets are nice, and the two seemingly really enjoy what they are doing, going back and forth through the sex with relative ease. There’s not much to this scene, mind you, it’s a lot of touching, and fingering, and a little oral here and there, but it’s mostly just a sensual romp.

Rikki Blake and Craig Roberts are supposedly next for the sex competition and it’s interesting to see at first. The initial oral wasn’t half bad, but over the course of the sex it started to get boring a bit, and well, it’s a bit lackluster. There’s not much in terms of sound, no music that I could hear, no moaning, and just average sex. It works, but it’s as though the two just didn’t really get into this fast paced sequence of sex. Rikki Blake is a shorter, thin blonde, and while it works for a little bit, it just gets old fast, and the sex is mediocre at best.

Next we see Steve Drake and Traci Lords, and it’s not a terrible scene. It starts with oral from Lords to Drake, and the music once again sucks, but there’s a bit of focus on a different bed set and smoke. It’s an interesting contrast to the other scenes, and Drake here is in his prime, cut, thin, and built. Lords welcomes him to dine, and shows off her flexibility before they start to engage in anything further. Lords is quite loud in this one as she always is, and it truly does look good through the short sex scene. Drake seems to enjoy the whole process going through the motions of multiple positions here.

Up next out comes Ginger Lynn. Ginger Lynn in her prime is what you’re getting here, and she’s always amazing to watch. For this scene, you get Paul Baressi and Steve Powers joining Ginger Lynn for a threesome. They immediately launch into oral, and start to work towards sex, slowly. For all intents and purposes, this is your average sex scene with three people. Lynn moans a great deal for the most part, especially during the 47 minute mark, and she really seems to be enjoying things, while one guy is behind her and the other is in her mouth. She then starts to give a dual hand job, and it’s not bad, but not great either. The guys take turns with her, but eventually this leads to something a bit more compelling. If you’re a fan of double penetration, then you’ll love the 50 minute mark when things get started in that direction. Ginger Lynn gets double penetration and she is as loud as ever. After a bit of this, there’s a cum shot and that’s it. Lynn and her partners get a 9.5 for their performance by the judges.

Up next comes Susan Hart and Greg Rome for sex. This is a mediocre scene with terrible techno music. Susan Hart is a thin, tanned, curly haired brunette. Greg Rome comes out dressed like a Roman and the two start with oral quickly. This is a lackluster, boring scene with only the set and the music to really distract you. Hart has some big breasts, and moans a bit towards the 56 minute mark, but other than that, this is a somewhat frivolous scene and will no doubt only find a few fans. It’s phoned in completely, and while I don’t hate it, it’s obvious that the two have little chemistry and that they are going through the motions. It’s workable, and out of the blew we get a cum shot, and the judges only give this a 6.7 overall. It’s not a great scene at all.

Since this is a game show, they give awards at the end. And they give everyone an award, and nothing that great. Rachel Ashley gets the award for Miss Passion, and that’s the end of the movie. Perhaps one of the oddest ones I’ve reviewed thus far.

I give “Miss Passion” a 2 out of 5.

Yes, it’s creative. Yes it features some ok performances from the actors, but honestly, it’s not that great. It gets a little boring at times. In fact, I wanted to turn it off at certain points. It’s an interesting premise, no doubt, and it works as a porno from the 1980s. I can see this being shown in theaters, honestly, but outside of that, I don’t think anyone is going to be wanting to see this unless it’s the unedited version which is extremely hard to get.