The Villa (2005) Review

The Villa (2005)

We are back again with another porno review, and this time we are going back to 2005. We go back 13 years to see a movie that was shot on film, and was a bit of a film within a film. In this movie, we are going to get focused on what the industry is kind of like, but in a very, cinematic presentation. There’s film grain from the start, and we get thrown into the mix within 5 minutes of starting. The movie we have selected for today is called, “The Villa” and it was released in 2005. It is part of the collection of movies that Janine did with men and women, getting away from her lesbian only content, to do men. This movie stars Janine, Jassie, Evan Stone, Julian, Haley Paige, Tiana Lynn, Vincent Vega, Nick Manning, and Dale Dabone. The dvd version of this movie has a lot of extras, but I got a no-frills review copy, so I can’t comment on that. This movie was directed by Paul Thomas, if that is of interest to any of you.

The movie starts in a large mansion. We see a young brunette talking to a director in a little black dress. The director here is Janine, and she’s talking to the woman and telling her that she has to have more than a pretty face to get involved in the industry. She then starts to dance for Evan Stone, and we get started with the first sex scene. This scene, starts with Jassie and Evan Stone playing with one another, and then move into oral sex, with Janine joining in. There’s a camera guy here that is getting filmed and that’s Julian, and he gets into the action when Janine turns her attention to him. Janine starts to blow Julian, while Jassie and Evan Stone have sex, making this a four way sex scene. This starts fair enough, but Jassie is overshadows by the veteran performers in Julian and Janine. The camera moves around a bit, but you don’t want to see what Evan Stone is doing, even though it looks like he took off his condom at one point. Fans of Janine are going to want to selfishly look at whatever she’s doing, and she moans and is more theatrical than the young one. Julian of course is jacked here, and he is in prime, while Evan Stone is also built, the two throwing down what you would expect from the vets in porn. There’s no music after the initial techno sound, and you get an interesting movement throughout the filming. There’s a roaming camera throughout, and there’s sound that shows off the movement more than anything else. The interior is lit well, the design is great, and the two guys take turns with Jassie, after a while, and you hear Evan Stone and Janine going at it again at the 14 minute mark. Mind you, there’s a lot of sex going on here, all protected, but still with lots of sound and more. You are not going to be left out wondering what is going on, that’s for sure. Before the 15 minute mark, we see dueling masturbation and Stone and Julian cum on their partners, and that’s it. Janine blows Stone after he cums, which is an incredible sight, but other than that, you’ll find that this ends as hot as it began, with dueling cocks showing off, and Janine and the vets throwing down a great scene. Jannie is the missing link here, she’s just not that good.

The scene ends and we see Janine and Evan Stone talking. They are discussing whether or not Janine wants to get involved in movie making, and she says that she doesn’t want to be involved with Gonzo movies, that she wants to be in features. She then says that she will retreat to a villa somewhere for a while, and that’s where we catch up with her next. Janine is scene at a computer, and she starts to type what her movie would be like. We then start to hear some rock music, and see a random dude jogging to what appears to be a lighthouse. Then we see Janine walking around with a hat on, and just going through a walk or something. She goes to the base of her home and picks up her mail. That’s when a random dude runs by, and Janine looks at him with a bit of intent. The rock instrumental reminds me of Soundgarden or Alice In Chains for the most part. As the movie continues, we see that Janine is having a bit of writer’s block, so she starts to imagine the jogger and starts to play with herself before bed. There’s some soft music playing, and there’s a lot of shadow in this bedroom scene. There’s an attempt at art here, not just straight forward sex, which is always a nice touch. Janine goes solo here, and that’s about it, nothing major.

Janine either goes to sleep or wakes up from a dream to find that there are three people in the villa just kissing and having a good time. A terrible looping musical soundtrack begins, and we end up seeing that it’s Vincent Vega, Haley Paige, and Tiana Lynn. Now, I’m not familiar with any of these performers. Haley Paige and Tiana Lynn look young, like in their 20s, and they have French tip nails, long hair, one is dirty brown, and the other is a little more blonde. They are completely shaved, one has large breasts and the others aren’t so big. Vega is clean shaven, latino looking, and seems to get hard fast, but the women are more interested in themselves. After some kissing, we end up getting some foreplay. Haley Paige, and Tiana Lynn start with oral, then give oral to Vega, before the trio start into the hardcore sex. The music stops during the sex, and the trio get down on a black couch. It’s not a great scene, and the women moan a bit dramatically, with Vega doing his best to keep things moving up and up. If you had an “average” porn scene, this would be it. The trio have robotic sex, and while there seems to be an attempt to squirt at around 30 minute mark, there’s nothing major going on other than your standard sex. Even Vega looks a bit robotic here, and there’s a lack of passion. Music restarts around the 31 minute mark, and things continue. This is a longer sex scene than the others, but that doesn’t make it great. The scene ends with Vega finishing o the girls, and that’s it. It’s sterile, and lacking emotion, but visually, it’s well lit, has a nice interior design, and well, it works on the level that it’s straight sex.

The scene ends and the women say that Vega can go and that the other woman can go. One woman tells two to go and then Janine shows up and helps the duo leave. Two people leave in a Jaguar, and it leaves Janine and Hailey Paige all alone.

The movie progresses, and we are taken outside where a gardener is working. Haley Paige is getting nude and feeling the pool water. Meanwhile there’s a random dude jogging, and Janine once again sees him. She offers him some water and stops him. The two talk a bit. Janine asks him if he wants to take a break. He says he cannot take a break, but maybe next week he will be around. Janine says he can definitely come back, and the movie goes back to Haley Paige in the pool. That prompts Janine to come out in a bikini and hat, and then starts talking to Paige.

There’s a lot of filler in this movie, I’m not going to lie. Janine is just meandering through the movie, and we are treated to seeing her moving through different areas. The movie moves to where Janine talks to the random dude at a spot that looks a lot like the Melody Inn near LAX. At around the 45 minute mark there’s a bit of a sex scene, but I’m not sure who it is, it’s not Haley Paige, but it’s a lot of close ups featuring a young waitress and a dildo. But that’s short lived as Janine keeps trying to hit Nick Manning. When Janine sees that Tiana Lynn wants in on the sex she runs away from Manning, and says that she’s not interested in him anymore. Manning goes back to the bar and that’s where Tiana Lynn is waiting for him. Either way, Paige has small breasts, reddish brown hair, and Manning is built and thin overall. The sex is fine, with the two getting oral first, then around the 55 minute mark Tiana Lynn squirts, which is interesting, but manning is just odd, and goes nuts as he drops a load. HE’s like a cartoon in this movie. He makes a lot of noise, and I laughed at the whole thing.

We go back to the Villa and that’s where we see Haley Paige and Janine. They end up in the shower together, and the starting point is lesbian sex, which is normal, I guess, it’s nothing crazy, I can’t complain. It’s slow moving, and Janine looks far older than Paige. Paige and Janine have lesbian sex in a very nice shower, with techno music going on. There’s a lot of kissing, and a lot of fingers used in this complete solution. A dildo shows up at around the 1 hour mark, which is somewhat good I guess. This is a teaching moment more than anything else, and honestly, it’s not a bad scene, but it’s far from what I thought it would be overall. I appreciated the sequence enough, and while it’s well lit, it has some interesting moments, it’s really just somewhat robotic at times. There’s no passion. Oh well.

We move to another scene, and this time we see Haley Paige swimming in the nude when Nick Manning shows up. Nick Manning is a cartoon performer. Haley Paige and Nick Manning start having sex, and it appears to be a part of Janines fantasy more than anything else. He reminds me of the dude that replaced Dirk Diggler in “Boogie Nights”. He’s loud, he’s demanding, and he is like a cartoon to me. “That’s it baby, suck, yeah suck”, is not sexy. He’s built, has a medium sized penis, and yells at times. “YEAH!”, is not something you want to see from a random dude. He moves through the motions of sex with Haley Paige, and I can honestly say that this is the first scene that actually is good with Paige genuinely enjoying the sex, and Manning throwing down some serious edge at around the 1 hour 13 minute mark, which is impressive considering he plays it like a “bro”. If you want to see a comedic moment, just watch this, Manning is hilarious, and perhaps that’s why he kept getting work? This is a parody of porn, right? Oh man, I couldn’t believe it.

There’s a point when Manning calls Janine a cunt, and then she pushes him a pool, and that’s that. He goes away.

The next day we see a gardener coming through the Villa and he starts to get led by Janine into an outdoor patio area. She starts to whisper in his ear, and the two start to make out. Janine slowly caresses him, kisses him lightly, and then the two start to take their clothes off. The gardener here is played by Dale DaBone. He’s an average looking white dude, but this is a focused scene for Janine, which starts easy enough. Dale Dabone starts to give Janine oral, the two start to make out more, and then we are off to the races with sex, including Janine taking off her sun dress. Fans of Janine, waiting for her to have sex without a condom on will get really close around the 1 hour and 21 minute mark where Dabone rubs his penis on Janine’s vagina, without insertion, but just rubbing, and getting wet. It’s an interesting play of sorts, and one that gets cut in favor of more oral. A blanket is put out, and the two start to have sex on it, but you don’t see if Dabone puts on a condom or not, which may be the director’s way of trying to hide the fact. The sex starts smooth, slow, and steady. It’s not that fast, it’s not that hard, it’s just steady and Janine seems to have fun here before she asks for him to cum on her, which he obliges, and ends the scene. The music cuts out, you just hear them have sex, and that’s the end of this scene and the movie for the most part. We go back to Janine eating cake, and looking at a computer screen, and that’s pretty much it. Janine turns in a script, and Evan Stone talks to Evan and then they just share a few moments. Janine shows off the cast, and that’s it, we get a moment where one of the women squirt, and that’s the end. Weird ending.

I give “The Villa” a 3 out of 5.

While I didn’t think it was completely horrible, and I love Janine, I felt that the performances sandwiched between hers weren’t that good. Janine makes up for it, and if you’re a fan of hers, this will be a great option to look into, but other than that, it’s not that great. It has a lot of filler and it’s not that long of a movie.

You can purchase “The Villa” which features Janine in two different boy and girl scenes by CLICKING HERE, and getting all the extra features and scenes.

The Shark (1999) Review

The Shark (1999) DVD Cover

The smooth jazz opening from Wicked greeted me for a trip back to 1999. The movie in question today is, “The Shark”, and it stars Nina Hartley, Serenity, Evan stone, Alex Sanders, Mickey G, Bridgette Kerkove and many others. I was surprised by the high quality introduction, with some good music for a change. The videography is done by Jake Jacobs, editing by Donald O’Brien, written by Patti Rhodes, and directed by F.J. Lincoln. This is a higher budget film than I’m used to reviewing, and it’s kind of an exciting thing to get a higher budget 1990s movie. I call it a movie because the music is done well, the film grain is there, and it is definitely more than just a random gonzo porno, which I’m all about. There’s a story, and it opens with a poker scene, and some interesting music. An underground poker game starts, and we see our stars playing, nothing crazy, right? Nope.

“The Shark” starts with a bunch of guys playing poker, and two women looking at one another. This is Nina Hartley and Serenity. They look at one another and they leave the poker table. They exchange a few words in the bathroom, and Nina gets on her knees and starts to give Serenity oral. I can say this much about Nina Hartley, she’s amazing, and she knows what’s she is doing, because she really gives it to Serenity, in what seems to be a natural sequence of lesbian sex. Serenity is an up and comer, while Hartley is a legend. The two are blonde haired, fit women, and here you see a lot of oral and the use of a toy, with Serenity orgasming for real, and Nina Hartley looking amazing. I would love to meet her one day, I bet she has some stories to tell. This isn’t a long scene. The music is funny, as it sounds like big band Las Vegas style. The two go back and forth giving each other kisses and oral, and eventually finish, and that’s that. This is a hot scene if you like lesbian sex, and if you love the actresses, then you’re going to enjoy this somewhat short scene.

When the sex is done, we get back to a poker game, and it’s not that great. It’s just a random game, and everyone is winning and losing. The story goes, that Mickey G is running out of money. Mickey leaves the game, and then goes home. He is wishing he could get more money, but instead just paces as Serenity sits in a weird looking chair. Mickey G then wants to play Serenity in a game of poker. She goes to sleep, and the next scene features Serenity showing up to the poker house and winning big.

The sun comes up, and we are back at the house where Mickey G. is just playing solitaire and trying to just relax. In comes Bridgette Kerkove and Ginger Paige. The two women give Mickey G. one hell of a ride. We then get a full sexual romp with Mickey G. Bridgette Kerkove and Ginger Paige, and it’s not half bad. One blonde and one burnette, and we get an interesting focused sex scene with some synth rock. Mickey G. seems to have a hadr time getting hard at first, going soft with the initial blow job, and it’s kind of odd. The director wisely shifts gears, and you are directly placed into the sex, where Mickey finally is hard and going through doggy with one of the women. Mickey wears a condom and enters one of the women, the music shifts to a techno beat, and this becomes a standard sex scene. It’s not as passionate as the other stuff I’ve seen Mickey in, but it works for this scenario. There’s not much chemistry between the actors, and it’s a bit telling. There is an anal sequence, and at that point things get a little louder. If you’re a fan of anal, then you’ll like how this sequence ends, as Mickey gets his rhythm and really does well towards the end of the scene, eventually cumming and rubbing his member on the blonde, but not putting himself back in, making it an ok scene.

UP next we see Serenity winning a big load at the poker table. She complains that she wants to get into bigger action. She then walks towards another table and sits down. She wants higher stakes. And she starts to jump into a table that is higher ranked.

Moving along, Serenity goes back to the house. Evan stone and Nina Hartley introduce themselves to Serenity, but after some time, you end up going to the bedroom. In the bedroom Nina Hartley and Evan Stone start making out. This leads to Nina taking off her lingerie, keeping her heels on and blowing Stone. Evan Stone really gets hard here, and Hartley is one of the classic porno stars that looks amazing for her age. If you’re a fan of hers, you’ll love her work here as Stone can barely keep without cumming at various stages. The foreplay isn’t long as Evan Stone drives himself into Nina in missionary position and then some. He has a condom on, but you don’t see him put it on. She gets really wet and moans a great deal, as Stone throws down his classic moves. It’s a straightforward hard sex scene, with Stone cumming on Hartley’s back and butt, and that’s that. Not a great scene, but it did start hot. He slaps his penis on Nina’s but and causes her to scream, and than that’s that.

We move along to Mickey G. waiting outside of a lounge begging for another shot at the deeper table. Alex Sanders says that he can’t let her borrow the money, except, maybe sex. So the two engage some sex, and that’s the next scene.

Serenity and Alex Sanders start to make out in the lounge, and that leads to sex. It starts with Serenity giving Sanders a blow job, and getting really into it, then Sanders fingering her. The two have a bit of chemistry together, which makes this scene stand out amidst the others. You also get romantic music to score the scene. It feels more like a Hollywood production than a porno, which is always a good thing when it comes to porno. Sanders is completely shaved, Serenity’s dirty blonde long hair reaches down to her lower back, and she is truly a curvaceous blonde. Serenity really gets into it at one point and cums on Sanders’ fingers and that’s the hottest part of this scene. Her moans are genuine, and she contracts with real orgasms. Eventually a condom comes on and the two engage in a nice romp. The setting of a bar next to a pool table is good, and the sex is dynamic, with Serenity wearing black heels, and just getting into the action. She looks kind of like the girl next door, but with a twist, and Sanders looks like a rocker. The two go forward in some nice back and forth. Eventually Sanders cums on her face, and that’s the end. This is a much more romantic scene than I thought it would be, and it turned out great.

Up next, Serenity gets a chance at playing with the big boys of poker. They go through some motions, and then leaves Sanders and Tracy Love alone. That leads to another sex scene.

Tracy Love is a short haired busty blonde, and Alex Sanders is the same dude that you already saw. The two make out on the top of a bar, and Love really gets into the action right away. She looks like Sunny from WWE at one point. Tracy Love and Alex Sanders go through a hot, hard scene here. This is done in a bar, on top of the bar itself and it starts with kissing than oral fast. Love is shaved, and she gets really wet really fast, and things go smoothly for the most part. This is a much harder scene than the first one was, and it’s interesting to see. Alex Sanders really goes in hard with Tracy Love here. The scene is fast, and hard, with a focus on anal at one point. He slowly drives it in, then goes to town with Love screaming at one point. He eventually cums on her pubic mound and that’s it. This was a very fast scene, with a lovely girl, and Sanders playing a good role overall.

The movie continues, and it’s the end. Mickey G thanks Serenity for winning the big poker game and squaring all the money with Sanders. The two start to make out in a bathroom, and you know that this is the end of movie. Serenity and Mickey G. start to make out, and then undress, going into a passionate love making scene, that is the signature for Wicked. The two step into a hot tub, and oral commences. Serenity blows Mickey and this time he’s hard nearly immediately. He starts giving her oral, and she’s shaved, and gets really wet really fast. The two obviously have some chemistry together and it shows. She moans a great deal. Mickey puts on a condom and the two have sex on the tub, in the tub, and through multiple positions. The bathroom looks like a major vegas suite, and there’s a techno beat with a singer underneath the moaning and the groaning. This is an above average scene with the two actually having some chemistry. It’s interesting to see them work through the motions of sex here and definitely something that you would love if you’re a fan of either performers. I’m not a big fan of Serenity, but she’s hot enough to make these scene interesting. Mickey G tries to hold on for a lot of the scene, nearly cumming several times, but eventually holds on to finally cum for a money shot. The money Shot features Mickey G cumming on serenity’s face and that’s the end of the movie. Serenity is a good looking dirty blonde haired woman, and seems to enjoy this scene most.

The movie ends with Serenity winning the World Championship of Poker, and that’s about it. Nothing too crazy, and nothing too grand. The movie finishes off with the credits, and it’s not half bad if you ask me.

I give “The Shark” a 3 out of 5.

I can’t give it more than 3 because of the condom use, which isn’t seen being put on, and the lackluster enthusiasm on several of the scenes. While there are a few scenes that are very good, the sets are done well, and there’s a decent story, the performances aren’t that titillating, so I have to give this a 3. Hey, if you’re a fan of Serenity, you’ll love this one, but if you’re not, you may find this to be passable at best.

You can order “The Shark” on DVD by clicking here, and streaming it as well with 10 minutes free!

Carnivorous (1999) Review

Carnivorous (1999) DVD Cover 

It just so happened that I had to review another modern classic, one that was shot on film, and looks great overall. The starting point of this movie is all film grain, and really well shot. I am surprised by the budget, and the art direction which has 4 people working on it. The editing is top notch, the music is good, and everything about this movie starts off with a killer element to it. I didn’t see this one featured on The Spice Network, or anything, and so this is all new to me. Nic Cramer directs, and lots of well known actors star in this movie from 1999, it’s called “Carnivorous”, and it stars Jessica Drake. That’s right, another Jessica Drake movie, because apparently I find her beautiful all of a sudden, or it’s just a matter of selection. Other people in this movie includes Mickey G. Kristen, Brian Surewood, Gia, Chris Cannon, Ian Daniels, Cheyenne Silver, and Evan Stone.

The movie opens up in what appears to be an old west setting. Jessica Drake is trying to beat the heat with some water when Evan Stone with an eyepatch shows up and points a gun at her. That’s when you get narration, and story, and an interruption by Mickey G. The story is about an erotic novelist that is having a hard time figuring out how to move his story along, and Jessica Drake plays his wife that is breaking his concentration here and there. The erotic novel has a wild west theme to it, and the movie goes between the writer and his book, and so we get moving forward from there.

The first major sex scene starts around 5 minutes from the credits, and it features Jessica Drake and Mickey G. There’s a nice western themed guitar riff going and some drums, meanwhile the two make out for the most part. This is a sensual scene, featuring lots of kissing and lots of romantic elements between Jessica Drake and Mickey G. Drake in this movie has dirty brown hair, which is different from what I remember her having in the previous movie I reviewed. After some kissing, she gets on her knees and delivers a very sloppy, slow, and sensual blow job to Mickey G. The music is a rocksteady beat of guitar work, and is similar to what you’d expect from Eric Clapton, believe it or not. It’s a nice tune to complement the sex that is occurring here. Drake does well enough here, with passion, and Mickey G holds on for dear life, the professional, obviously. The movie switches to sex, and it’s standing doggy style, and it’s just straightforward, nothing crazy. Mickey G. dawns a condom, and Drake takes it, while wearing a shirt, so you can’t see her completely nude. It’s a steady scene of sex, and nothing too exciting, an outdoor sex scene with film grain, and high quality editing. Eventually positions change, and Drake takes off her top, and Mickey G. looks to be concentrating not trying to cum early, and rightfully so, because after a certain point Drake goes all in on this, and seems to lose herself in the scene. It’s an exciting thing to see, and the music shifts to a bass heavy element, as the two finish up with each other outdoors. The money shot goes forward with Mickey G letting loose on Drakes face, and she keeps stroking afterwards, then puts her mouth on it, a stellar movement, that is just sexy. Drake really seems to do well here, and acts great if you ask me.

The scene ends and you get narration, where our writer talks to his assistant or an editor and gets feedback about the book. He then is by a pool and talks to someone else about the book and some ideas as to how to keep writing etc.

We move along to the next scene, another imaginative tale, this time it’s Brian Surewood and Kristen that are in an artsy bedroom having sex. It’s as close as you’re going to get to a gonzo scene in this high end production. This woman is thin, has long legs, dirty blonde hair, and wears heels. Meanwhile, Brian Surewood looks like a mix of one of the DOA from WWF mid 1990s and Jesse Ventura. He gets straight to oral, with Kristen moaning and rubbing herself, all the while a techno beat plays under them. This porn actress looks like Ann Coulter a little, so you can imagine her that way. Kristen works through a nice blow job but she keeps looking at the camera, and it’s odd, to see her staring at the director and the camera. There’s a camera change, and then things get to the action, with full penetration as you’d expect, and a scene that speeds up quite well. The initial starting line doesn’t seem to have a condom, so it’s a bit different than the previous scene, and this goes from insertion to high gear. Brian Surewood really goes hard here, and why not? It’s a fast moving scene with a lot of action, and not much else. You get multiple positions, lots of movement, and a money shot on Kristen’s face, with an ending blow and tug, and that’s that. A good fast paced scene that is not sensual as it is just two people going at it, which is a nice change of pace from the starting scene.

The movie continues, and it’s our writer talking to Jessica Drake, and she wants him to stop working and drinking. She has little to no makeup on here, and is quite attractive here. I’d love to interview Jessica Drake and ask her a few questions about characters and more, but I don’t know who to even call for that one.

Moving along our writer needs help trying to get a bit of action, and with the help of an assistant he comes up with a new gonzo scenario. This time it features a tall, skinny woman that goes through a jail. She has brown hair and an orange dress, and starts to talk to a guard, and then gets into the action. The two start having sex in a cell, and she keeps her dress on for the most part. She’s very thin, and the guard is a bit dominant to her submissive style, and the two work well together, although it’s a bit straightforward, and out of the blue. It’s another contrast to the style that was placed in the earlier scenes, this time with techno and a bit slower methodology. It’s not fast at all, which is ok, but the two seem to lack chemistry for the start and eventually build. The two actors that start include Gia and Ian Daniels or Chris Cannon, I’m not sure. Either way, the two start and then we get a third. The music speeds up to a techno and keyboard mix, and things get even hotter when a third person comes in to help with the movement. You start with two, and end with three, and it’s not half bad overall, but it’s not sexy if you ask me. There’s something missing here, and while there are no condoms in sight, and the movie is well porn, it just lacks a certain chemistry if you ask me.

Moving forward we end up with a scene that features Cheyenne Silver and Evan Stone. This after a segue where the writer and Jessica Drake discuss the next scene and how they can make it better. The sex features a condom, and Evan Stone going through the motions. Silver and Stone do not have the same chemistry that I’ve seen him have with other actresses, but it’s a functional scene where he just goes through the motions and that’s about it. I’ve seen him interact with many others, and this was not nearly as wild or as intense. Silver is a blonde hair young woman, and she’s attractive, don’t get me wrong, but you can tell that the two are just going through the motions and aren’t really that into it at times. The money shot occurs on Silver’s chest and that’s it, nothing too wild. She even looks at the camera to see if the director wants her to stop or not, and that’s it.

The scene switches and the writer talks to a friend about where things are going, etc. Then he introduces the last bit of the story to a couple of women, these being Jessica Drake and Shanna McCullough. This ending scene features Mickey G, Shanna McCullough, and Jessica Drake.

I give “Carnivorous” a 3 out of 5.

The final scene got me, I have to admit. Shanna McCullough and Jessica Drake making Mickey G a lucky man is a great ending to an otherwise average porno movie.

You can purchase “Carnivorous” through a variety of means, including the link right here, which is something to consider.

Car Wash Angels 2 (1999) Review

Car Wash Angels 2 DVD Cover (1999)

Once again, we visit the year 1999, only this time it’s to watch and review a sequel to one of the early reviews of this website. The movie is none other than “Car wash Angels 2”. That’s right, our first major sequel on this website, and it’s going to happen often. This movie is a direct sequel from the original that I reviewed here. “Car Wash Angels” has one of my favorite scenes from an adult movie, which was with T.T. Boy and Jill Kelly. On this sequel we are thrown into a new story, where the original Doctor Elvis is missing. This is more of a gonzo porno movie, as there’s a lot of sex and little progression of the story. You get an introduction of the main characters, as the credits come through, and then the movie gives you 12 scenes, and exactly what you’d expect if you saw the original. This is a movie that I first heard about on the Spice Network, and it was heavily edited. But this of course was hardcore, since I got the DVD, and well, it’s straight forward, so let’s get to talking about this sequel from Jim Holliday. This movie stars Chloe, Bobbi Bliss, Sydnee Steele, Shayla LaVeaux, Devin Wolf, Jill Kelly, Julian, Evan Stone, Renee LaRue, Barett Moore, Allysin Chaynes, Anita Cannibal, Brooke Hunter, Ron Jeremy, and so many others.

The opening scenes after the introductions is straightway gonzo style. It features the actress Chloe having sex with Evan Stone. Chloe has a very distinct vagina, if you ask me, and this starts with a blow job from the dark reddish haired siren. Stone gets off, but the scene goes directly into anal. Stone is ripped, and he seems to really enjoy anal, as well as Chloe from here moaning and screams. There’s a condom in this scene, but it keeps sliding, and it really looks as though it’s not going to stay on most of this scene as Stone goes deeper and deeper. The music has a rockabilly tone for a bit, with dancing bass lines, that start to move around as the action continues. There’s several positions done, with my favorite, reverse cowgirl getting a lot of attention here. At one point it certainly looks like the condom fell off, but the director hides that with a quick change of scene, and Stone cumming on Chloe’s back.

The scene ends and you get introduced to more women, and then you hear a funny tune about Car Wash Angels, which is a custom sitcom sounding tune. You then are introduced to all of the women in this movie, and there’s a lot of them. There’s a “who’s who” list of blonde haired porno babes, and wow, you’ll definitely be surprised by the list of women.

After the music, you get a scene with Bobbi Bliss and Sydnee Steele in the back of a truck. They play it up for the camera with a lot of moaning and sounds. The two seem to get into their lesbian scene, and it’s not bad at all. There’s a lot of oral here, and it’s not half bad. If you’re a fan of lesbian scenes, this is a good one for you, as the two are quite attractive. There’s rimming, oral, fingering, and more. The director focuses on close ups here overall. Both girls are pretty, and they just go through the masturbation and oral that the scene demands. The music is muted a bit, but it’s a jazzy tune, and it’s not a bad scene, but it’s definitely a bit more hardcore than the first movie.

The movie moves forward with Ron Jeremy and Evan Stone in an office. They are talking about how the car wash is going well, and all things are interesting. The acting here is funny, with Jeremy’s timing great. Tabitha stevens is also good here. After this scene, you get to the car wash, all of the women washing a car naked, which is a sight to see for sure. Moving on, the movie goes to a detective story, where two detectives are searching for what happened with Dr. Elvis. This transitions into a wipe, and a new sex scene.

The next sex scene features Shayla LaVeaux and Devin Wolf. This is a sterile scene at first, with bad acting. This is a fast moving sequence, with Shayla doing a lot of dirty talking as the scene goes forward. There’s a flesh covered condom in this scene which the director tries to hide. Devin Wolf keeps his socks on, which is distracting, and LaVeaux does a lot of the work here. She rides like crazy, and really does a great deal to make this scene somewhat good. Wolf seems to be bored at times, and while he holds onto his erection, it’s really Shayla that makes this scene great. There’s no music that I can tell during this scene, just her dirty talk and moaning, mixed with the sound of flesh getting pounded. Wolf cums on her feet, which was a new ending for me, and afterwards Shayla licks her own feet!

Next up, Julian and Jill Kelly are in the back of a truck, and they have sex. This is another disappointment between the two. I’ve seen them have sex before, they were in a Babewatch Sequel I reviewed, and honestly, this wasn’t that good. Jill Kelly is a good looking woman to me, but she didn’t do well with Julian for some reason. These two just didn’t have a lot of chemistry. At least not how I thought they should. It’s not a bad scene, but it’s definitely “mechanical” in a way. There’s multiple positions, condom used, and it’s not bad overall. Yes, it’s ok, but is it grand? Not really. Julian cums on Jill Kelly, and that’s it. Not a great scene, at all.

This transitions to a squirt gun fight, I kid you not. Then we’re back in the offices of the car wash going forward with that detective story. Then Evan stone shows up and surprises Renee LaRue. The two immediately start to do it.

Evan stone is a cool overall dude, and he starts with giving oral to Renee LaRue. She’s a tall blonde that’s nearly shaved. There’s a bit of comedy thrown in, but that’s fast, so if you didn’t catch the one liner, you definitely missed it, obviously. This is an ok scene, no doubt. Stone does well with LaRue and she is quite loud. I love the sound, and Stone is definitely in control here. He gets really into throwing his body into Renee, and she gives back just as well, so if there’s a best scene, it may be this one. Evan Stone as some great comedic timing, and he really does well in having sex here. There’s an anal element too, so if you like seeing him do anal, then this is going to be great. It’s a great overall scene, with a lot of sweat, sounds, and more. Eventually Stone cums on her breasts and that’s the end. There’s a comedic element throughout the scene with a skeleton showing up. It was funny.

After the scene the detectives discuss how they are going to talk to every woman one by one.

Next up you get a scene with Julian and he’s blown by Anita Cannibal and Bobbi Bliss. That’s it. That’s all that they were doing, just blowing him, and that transitions back to another car wash.

The women are washing a car when Evan Stone shows up, and they just spout off the rules of the car wash.

Up next, we see Barett Moore and Devin Wolf. Barett looks familiar, because she is actually from XPW. This is Veronica Caine! That’s right, Veronica Caine is here, and it’s Devin Wolf again, doing his thing. He starts with oral, and then goes forward with having a good scene with Moore. Moore does anal, and there’s another flesh colored condom. It wasn’t half bad, but it’s very mechanical. Midway through this scene, you will be getting a second woman, Julie Meadows, showing up. That allows for Wolf to have a second helping in this scene. Both girls get anal, and that’s it, a good overall scene, but nothing so memorable that I would write home about. It’s ok, but it’s a bit mechanical. I will say this much, Meadows is louder than Moore, so that’s a good point.

The next thing that you are going to see is a dinner, where one of the girls tells a story. She tells a story of an all girl orgy, and then the movie goes to that. If you’re a fan of lesbian orgy scenes, then you’re going to love this one. It features 9 total girls, and they all go through various aspects of lesbian sex. Allysin Chaynes, Anita Cannibal, Brooke Hunter, Charmane Star, Chaz Vincent, CleoNichole, Daisy Chain, Gina Ryder, Inari Vachs, Kimberly Jade, Salina del Ray, Sydnee Steele, Temptress, Tracy Love, Victoria Evans, and Violet Love all have sex in this one.

Moving forward, you’re going to find Ron Jeremy and Bobbi Bliss talking, and eventually the two start having sex. Now, this is not vintage Ron Jeremy, this is fat Ron, and it’s a bit odd to see. He does well, as Bobbi squirms and loves the whole thing, but Ron is definitely not what he once was here. If you’re a fan of Ron Jeremy, then you’ll love this scene. It’s a quick scene, and it’s not half bad. If you like pretending that you’re having sex with hot women, then here you go, Ron Jeremy going to town, and eventually cumming on Bobbi Bliss’ feet, and that’s that.

We move to another car wash, and then a cutaway to three women having fun. These women include Angela Summers, Felecia, and Jill Kelly. It’s a standard lesbian scene, and it’s what you’d expect. Lots of oral, lots of hands, and a great deal pleasure. There’s a lot of moaning, and lots of hands. I don’t know what else to say, this is a hot scene, with a lot of tongues, and hands, and breasts.

The movie goes forward with the detective story, as it tries to shoehorn another element of storyline so that it’s not 100% gonzo. You need a plot in these right? That ends and we are taken a room where Jill Kelly, Tabitha Stevens, Evan Stone and Julian are. That’s where the foursome have sex, and it’s not half bad. Evan Stone really goes to work with Tabitha Stevens, and she really does well here, and makes a great deal of noise. Stone’s performance in this movie is definitely one to not miss. Tabitha gets really nasty here, and if you’re a fan of hers, then you’ll love watching this one. The two really work well together in this scene, and there’s no music, just them going to work and actually seeming like they like what they are doing. It’s rare to get a good scene like this, and it’s probably the best part of the movie. Out of the blue, Julian shows up and starts to have sex with the women, then changes with Stone, before they go for a DP on Jill Kelly. That finishes the scene, and it’s not bad. However, Jill Kelly’s performance is a bit mechanical compared to Tabitha Stevens, so that’s a bit of a let down. There are condoms used, so if you’re not a fan, you won’t like this one.

The movie ends with two women talking and just discussing how Dr. Elvis is probably doing ok, wherever he is. I wonder why they didn’t get him back? He was a funny element of the first movie.

I give “Car Wash Angels 2” a 3 out of 5.


There are good points, but honestly, I’m not a big fan of this. Just like many other sequels, this is not as great as the first one, not even a little.

You can buy, stream, and watch “Car Wash Angels 2” by clicking here. It’s not a bad movie, and if you’re a collector, get this and the first one here.

Did you see “Car Wash Angels 2”? If so, drop me a comment below.

Blue Matrix (2001) Review

Blue Matrix (2001) Cover 

For today’s review I’m doing something somewhat special. I’m going back to 2001 and looking at “Blue Matrix”. This is an award-winning movie from Adam and Eve Studios. I remember seeing trailers for this during my rentals of the Spice Network. This is a production that has a little bit more production value than most other movies. There’s a film grain on it from the start, and a cast of all-stars from the porn world. The opening shows you how much was invested in this, with interesting blue lighting, and a set piece showing shadows and more. This is an award-winning production, and if you’re a fan of watching adult movies that are revered by the industry, then this is going to be a good one for you to check out. I for one caught it on DVD because I’m a fan of Jill Kelly, and for some reason she still turns me on. I’d love to meet and interview her, but until then, I’ll have to review the movies she’s in for this site. The movie starts with a great deal of credits rolling, and some minor editing that shows you what’s going to be seen through the movie. This is not a gonzo porno production, mind you. The director of this film, is Nick Orleans, which I’m not familiar with right now, but I’m going to see more of his work after this one.

The movie opens up with Salina del Ray walking into a mansion. She then starts to pleasure herself. This is a blonde haired, enhanced woman with a tattoo on her arm. This is supposed to be sensual, and while it kind of is, it’s also a bit forced, and when you see this movie, you’ll know what I mean. She has a modelesque look, and pleasures herself on a red couch until her male partner shows up. Billy Glide shows up and he is absolutely ripped, and he starts to have sex with del Ray. You don’t see Glide putting on a condom, but he has one, and he goes to town here. It’s a very mechanical scene to start, and while it gets a little better over time, it’s very much sterile at times. The music is a jazzy number, and it’s not too bad, but it’s far from sexy for me, as Glide seems to be too concerned with mechanics than chemistry. There’s only a couple of positions here, but towards the 17 minute mark, Billy Glide really goes to town and eventually cums on del Ray’s breasts. She moans and screams at one point, but the scene ends quickly. After Billy Glide cums del Ray literally disappears. Leaving Glide alone and wondering where she went. If you’re a fan of Mighty Mighty Bosstones you may cue “Where’d You Go” about here.

The movie then transitions into what appears to be a backstage studio, where science and government meet. But that’s short lived after Glide calls in to ask a few questions. The agents then look at an experimental sex scene, with a set change, and it’s Ginger Paige and Jack Hammer. Jack Hammer has a sleeve on his arms, and I’m not sure why. Paige has skin tone stockings, meanwhile two agents watch the couple having sex.

Ginger Paige and Jack Hammer begin with fingering, and it’s not half bad. But it’s obviously forced, as you’ll find that Paige’s performance is somewhat directed. You’ll know it when you see it. Over the course of the scene, you get through some sex, with a blow job, then covered sex, and a little more passion through the second half of the scene. Not a sexy scene if you ask me, but the music isn’t half bad, and while this is functional, the set is interesting, and the idea of a top-secret government project is also interesting to me. There’s a “mechanical” and “business” focus here. Jack Hammer goes slow for a lot of it, and he really just tries to keep pace while Paige stimulates her clitoris during penetration. The two don’t seem to have much chemistry, but this is a functional scene that pushes the storyline a bit. As the agents watch on, Jack Hammer eventually starts to really pump and then cums on Paige’s stomach.

The next scene is transitioned with the stars in the sky, then a dancing girl from the beginning of the movie. A woman shows up and seems to have discovered a new universe, or a “matrix” and that leads to a scene featuring Alexandra Silk and Ian Daniels. This is very much like the movie “The Matrix” in how the motif is. While the two performers have mechanical, robotic sex, Jill Kelly shows up. Jill Kelly watches and masturbates as the two performers have safe sex with condoms. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with this at all, but it should be noted for those that really care. Alexandra Silk gets anal in this scene, and Daniels never takes off his glasses, because he’s in the “Matrix”, and he’s not going to let his cool guy card drop. I know Alexandra Silk is a famous actress, but she’s not that great to me, at least not in this scene. The director keeps panning to a somewhat bored Jill Kelly masturbating, but it’s an overtly simple scene, with a great set. The set and the costumes are interesting, but the majority of the scene isn’t that grand. This is very much an “artsy” type of porno scene. It didn’t really entice me at all, but I’m sure it’s a visually interesting scene for those that aren’t used to it. If you’re used to gonzo porno scenes, then you’ll hate this. However, Ian Daniels does have a nice money shot on Silk’s butt, which was cool.

Don’t want to read the rest of the review? I don’t blame you, these things get long. You could always buy Jill Kelly scenes on DVD or you could stream it by clicking here. Heck, you can see a scene for free with 15 minutes of free minutes if you stream in HD.

Up next, a simple transition gets to another experimental scene, only this time there’s a lot more industrial, alternative music to boot. This scene features Tina Tyler, Evan Stone, and Herschel Savage in a threesome. However, this is not a sexual one, or at least not in the traditional sense. This is just a scene where the two guys get hand jobs and masturbate until they are finished. It’s an odd scene, honestly. Stone and Savage cum nearly at the same time onto Tina Tyler, wow. Synchronized finishing? This is a first. Evan Stone disappears, and leaves Savage and Tyler alone, going into the “matrix”!

Moving forward, you get a scene where I believe Vivian Valentine starts to explain the Matrix of sex. Meanwhile, a bunch of government agents, for lack of a better word watch and she eventually gets on a black leather couch and starts masturbating for them. They are all typing data, and she starts to please herself. Valentine is new to me, she has a natural, teacher look, with brown hair, and just enough pubic hair to be sexy, as she keeps her heels on and continues to move forward. Dave Hardman shows up and the two have sex on the couch. A condom is put on and she goes with reverse cowgirl, one of my favorite positions, in case anyone cares to know. This isn’t half bad. There’s anal at one point and Valentine screams at a few points, mostly she likes this, and Hardman actually seems to be a good actor, as he seems to really be enjoying this one. The two have some good chemistry overall, and it’s fascinating.

Up next, you’re going to find a good lesbian scene with Taylor St. Claire and Salina del Ray. These two go through the traditional elements of heterosexual directors filming lesbian porn. Lots of oral, a dildo here, and the set piece from the other scenes. It’s not a bad scene mind you, and the two seems to have a good overall chemistry to what is going on. A lot of moaning, a lot of close ups, and just women on women. Taylor St. Claire and Salina del Ray are opposite types of women, one is blonde and one is brunette, one is bigger and the other smaller, and just a hot scene. Not half bad, honestly. There are a few weird moments like slapping the clitoris, but that’s just something I don’t know a lot about I guess. Other than that, the two seem to be loving the stimulation here. You could probably learn a few things, mind you. There’s a “scissoring” element at one point, and that’s always funny to see since they featured it in “South Park”, and well, it’s here, so there ya go guys, a little irreverent note.

After the lesbian scene the movie transitions to our government agents having sex. They are European looking, model types. The guy is ripped, and the woman is sexy as hell, blonde, and blue eyes. The actors names are Chennin Blanc and Cheyne Collins. These two have some serious chemistry, and make up for the rest of the scenes. From the oral elements to the actual sex on a massage table, the two really go through a great deal of positions, amidst a jazzy soundtrack. The set is good, and the two really seem to enjoy the process of making this scene. It’s always nice to see real chemistry between two actors in porn. The condom comes on, and on comes the sex. There’s a few moments where it seems mechanical, but then things start to improve as you see the muscles condense, and orgasm number one show up. Another anal scene here, a quick transition, and this gets hotter for those that love seeing anal scenes.

The final scene shows off Jill Kelly in a nice costume, with a corset. She finds Alec Metro and the two actually have a great deal of chemistry. There’s a lot of moaning and a lot of saliva here. Evan Stone shows up too, and Jill Kelly takes both of them on in this scene that features a lot of oral, a lot of saliva, and Jill Kelly doing her best performance since I first saw her in “Car Wash Angels”. I haven’t seen that many scenes with her, mind you, but from what I’ve seen, I enjoy her work. Evan Stone and Alec Metro are given the best blow job that Jill Kelly could give, both at the same time, as she goes back and forth holding onto each one, which is grand, making this movie a real treat. Condom comes on, and Kelly goes into riding cowgirl to start. The film cuts at one point, and it looks as though Metro loses his erection, while Stone gets blown. The director keeps this in the film mind you, but he bounces back and then goes back to work. My favorite part of all of this is where Alec kisses Jill Kelly on the mouth, in a break of character into a more sensual moment. I love that stuff. The bouncy disco tune and the set pieces make this an interesting scene, and Jill Kelly seems to have a lot of fun while Metro goes to work with her. Stone gets blown throughout the majority of the scene. No DP here, just both guys finishing on Jill Kelly’s breasts. She has such lovely eyes and hair, I’m enthralled still. This is a good ending scene, if you’re a fan of Jill Kelly than that’s the sole reason to watch this.

I give “Blue Matrix” a 4 out of 5.

The ending sequence makes this movie. Jill Kelly is one of the most beautiful women to me, and this is definitely a showcase for her, in the end. The rest of the movie has some good moments, and while the story is convoluted, there’s a bit of money paid to the production and the director of photography works well here. I liked it a lot, especially that ending scene with Jill Kelly.

You can purchase Jill Kelly scenes on DVD or you could stream it by clicking here. Heck, you can see a scene for free with 15 minutes of free minutes if you stream in HD.

Did you see “Blue Matrix”? Then why not leave a comment? Let me know if you saw this one.