Tuesday, March 16, 2021

Turn Up The Heat (1991)


Again we venture to the 1990s, only this time I’m reviewing a movie from 1991. This movie is called “Turn Up The Heat”.  This early movie from the 1990s stars Tom Byron, Charlie Waters, Bobby Soxx, David Sanders, Savannah, Tony Montana, Nina DePonca, Don Fernando, and Charlie Waters. There’s no hiding this one, it gets into the hardcore right away. It starts with a 1980s haired blonde woman with a black dildo, and she just gets it on for the camera. She’s not shaved, she is very much a 1980s looking actress, and I can only assume it is Charlie Waters, who is joined by Tom Byron after she goes to work with her dildo in and out. 


Charlie Waters is straight out of the 1980s and well, so is Tom Byron. The music isn’t bad though, classic porn cinema jazz. The two work well enough, but it is definitely not a great sex scene to introduce us to “Turn up The Heat”. 


At one point the dildo gets thrown out, and the camera zooms in to introduce us to another part of the movie.  Some dude steals the dildo, and then goes and uses it, and we are into the second scene. Bobby Soxx is a nice blonde, and David Sanders is a mullet wearing random dude, and the two have minimal chemistry. I had to fast forward it, it was bad. 


The best scene in the movie, and that’s not saying a whole lot is a scene that features Savannah. Savannah and Tony Montana get physical, and it’s the best part of this movie. She looks amazing, and Montana enjoys the process alongside her. I don’t get the hype surrounding Savannah, but in this one she does look amazing. Montana does well here, and Savannah takes it, but it’s definitely not one of the more memorable scenes. She doesn’t seem to have a lot of passion here, and it shows. However, she’s such a beauty that you want to continue watching just to see what happens, and of course you know. 


Scene 1. Charlie Waters, Tom Byron

Scene 2. Bobby Soxx, David Sanders

Scene 3. Savannah, Tony Montana

Scene 4. Nina DePonca, Don Fernando

Scene 5. Bobby Soxx, Charlie Waters


Things go south fast in this movie, and while there are two more scenes, it’s not that great. Unless you’re really into floral patterned couches and blondes. The ending scene isn’t terrible, and a cameo from Ron Jeremy makes it kind of funny. Ron has a non-sex role here, and he just happens to be on set for a black dildo to get thrown into the air, and he catches it. It’s one of those things that you only see if you’re watching the whole movie, so there you go suckas!


I give “Turn Up The Heat” a 1 out of 5. 


Monday, March 15, 2021

Wild Widow (1995) Review



Another 1990s movie? Yeah, well what can I say, I’m always watching something in the 1990s and today we are going to look into a movie that features some heavy hitters yet again. The name of the movie is, “Wild Widow”, and it stars Anna Malle, Hank Armstrong, Jeanna Fine, Steve Hatcher, Morgan Fairlane, Rick Masters, Alexandra Silk, Guy DiSilva, Raven McCall, Don Fernando, Ron Jeremy, and Santino Lee. 

 

The plot revolves around Jeanna Fine’s character, she has lost her husband and doesn’t know what to do with herself now. She has sex with her friends, her right hand man, and anyone else that is available. 

 

Scene 1. Anna Malle, Hank Armstrong  

Scene 2. Anna Malle, Jeanna Fine

Scene 3. Jeanna Fine, Steve Hatcher

Scene 4. Morgan Fairlane, Rick Masters

Scene 5. Alexandra Silk, Guy DiSilva

Scene 6. Jeanna Fine

Scene 7. Raven McCall, Don Fernando, Ron Jeremy, Santino Lee

 

Instead of going play by play, this time around I’m just going to point out that some of these scenes are boring and some are actually quite good. Anna Malle has a sense of enthusiasm that you miss in a lot of actresses. She really goes at it, and while Hank Armstrong isn’t that great, her work is not half bad. 

 

Fans of Jeanna Fine will love her work here, as she and Anna Malle make for a very good set of scenes. However, that’s where things really start to fall apart. Aside from scenes featuring Fine and Malle, you’re not going to get much. Alexandra Silk does anal, but other than that, this is a production that falls flat. 

 

I give “Wild Widow” a 2 out of 5 

Friday, March 12, 2021

Blue Movie (1995) Review


One of the best movies in the lexicon of adult cinema is that of Blue Movie. This was released in 1995, and it stars a lot of talent from the era. “Blue Movie” came out in 1995, and it stars Rebecca Lord, Steven St. Croix, Jenna Jameson, Tera Heart, Alex Sanders, Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi, Lana Sands, Jeana Fine,  TT Boy, Jenna Jameson, and Jordan St. James. The movie is shot on film, and the sets are all very well designed. This is an expensive adult movie, and it shows from the start to finish, including the soundtrack which features full orchestral moments. 


The movie opens up in a doctor’s office. A psychiatrist is talking to Steven St. Croix and she wants to get to the bottom of why he dresses like a woman. He says a few things, but the doctor wants more. 


Scene 1. Rebecca Lord, Steven St. Croix


Rebecca Lord is beautiful, has brown hair that is tied up as she is playing a doctor, and is not all the way shaved. She gets eaten out by Steven St. Croix to start the sex, and it’s a good bit of cunnulingus to begin the movie. The set design here is good, the soundtrack is fine, and we move forward into our X-rating fast. However, this doesn’t move forward into sex, instead it moves into the second scene, a cut away to something a bit different. 


Scene 2. Jenna Jameson


The movie shifts gear and while the credits roll we see a nude Jenna Jameson in a bed with fog machines going, candlelight, and her hands moving through to feel herself. This is contrasted with artsy scenes that have nothing to do with the plot, including blue balls that seem to talk to her. She plays with the blue ball and that’s that, an oddly erotic sequence without sex, as we get forward progress to a wake up. 


Plot point: Jenna takes a phone call, and she is told that she is supposed to be getting a story about a random dude. The story is about the “Legend of the Golden Oyster”, and the editor is yelling, and eating pickles of all things. Jenna Jameson’s character is in charge of getting a story, and that’s where the plot takes us. After getting caught trying to steal some information, we are taken to a backstage area, and the plot continues with the newspaper story thing. Make it through this, and you’re treated to the next sex scene, which seems to show a movie within a movie, and away we go again. 


Scene 3. Tera Heart, Alex Sanders


Tera Heart is just hanging out, when Alex Sanders shows up. Sanders is in full snowboarding gear while Heart is in heels and a bikini. Heart has brown hair and begins to blow Sanders immediately, giving him a great deal of attention. This starts somewhat timid if you ask me, and Heart’s skills are on display. She’s a thin brunette with nice breasts, and the camera takes time to move closer and further, with cuts highlighting expressions. The set here is that of a ski resort, and the music is orchestral. The two trade a lot of positions and we even get anal at one point, as the two actually seem to have some sort of chemistry. Fans of Heart will love to see her get some, and Sanders does well enough to keep the momentum going. There’s a facial to end things, and techno beats to move along as well. 


Scene 4. Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi


We move to another backstage segment, and this time Dallas Whitacker blows Tony Tedeschi. That’s the crux of this, while Jenna Jameson watches. Dallas is a blonde with an 1980s hair cut, and Tedeschi just receives oral and gets moving forward. This is a simple scene with a blow job at the center of it all. 


Scene 5. Lana Sands, Tony Tedeschi


Moving right along we end up seeing Tedeschi in a bar scene, where he gets blown by Lana Sands. Lana is a brunette that has tan skin, and Tedeschi moves forward with this fast. Sands is pretty, thin, and has natural breasts. The two have sex on the counter of a bar, and the music isn’t too bad. It’s a bit on the soft side, but Lana and Tedeschi go through the motions well enough. Anal occurs at one point, and Tedeschi puts it down with Lana moaning some. The bar background is not that much of a difference maker, and the movie continues with simple sex here. Not many positions, but a lot of close ups especially of the anal. 


Plot point: We get moving forward with the plot, and it’s about the Golden Oyster, as it gives unlimited power to the person that looks into it. The bar scene is just a film within a film, and we are driven to the next scene which is what many are going to be waiting for, and that’s Jenna and TT Boy, which she mentions in her book. 


Scene 6. Jenna Jameson, TT Boy


TT Boy and Jenna Jameson start things off with cunulingus, and then she blows him. If you read her book, then you’ll recall that this is the scene in which TT Boy got paid to climax more than once and she was surprised that he could do it. The overall sequencing here is good, and fans of Jenna are going to love the way the two work together with fast strokes and easy movements. 


Scene 7. Jeanna Fine, Jenna Jameson, Lana Sands


Just when you think you’re getting a story line, the movie moves again to just sex. That’s what the point is of these movies anyway. This time around you see Lana Sands, Jeanna Fine, and Jenna Jameson in a three way lesbian scene. The trio exchange kisses and cunnulingus throughout, while St. croix watches. It’s a tame scene in comparison to others, and it’s a nice change of pace. Nice set here, Roman in style, and we move forward to another scene. 


Scene 8. Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi

Dallas Whitacker enters and disrobes, then she gets on her knees and blows Tony Tedeschi. There’s not much to this scene in terms of story, the two just go straight forward into sex, and it’s not terrible. Tedeschi is a pro, and Whitacker has a wig on, and the two go through several positions together. The sex is somewhat robotic, and Tedeschi wears a condom for this one, but overall it is an adequate scene, with some nice music to boot. 


Scene 9. Jeanna Fine, Steven St. Croix


Next up we get a similar situation with Jeanna Fine and Steven St. Croix. From a blow job to cunnulingus to sex, we get a straight forward sex scene. It’s robotic, it isn’t that good, and honestly, perhaps the worst of the bunch in terms of sex in this movie. Jeanna Fine is hot, but ST. Croix is just a bit boring to watch here. 


Scene 10. Jordan St. James


The plot moves forward and we have no major continuity. We just go straight into a strip scene with Jordan St. James. Not before we get another look at blue balls, and that’s it. Jordan St. James strips, and well the credits roll. 


“Blue Movie” is a big budget sex movie, and it doesn’t fail to capture the imagination at times. However, in terms of good sex, it just lacks something. Sure, it is good in terms of it being shot on film, and the budget and sets. However, if you’re looking to get off, this is going to distract more than anything. 


I give “Blue Movie” a 3 out of 5. 


Monday, March 8, 2021

Cherry Pie (1994) Review


When I was a teenager I walked under a bridge in Santa Monica, California and found the remnants of a video box. That box was for the cover of today’s movie review, Cherry Pie. This is a famous movie for being an early Jenna Jameson release, and the introduction of Kylie Ireland. It’s the type of movie that collectors want to get their hands on, and people like me want to see uncensored. “Cherry Pie” stars Kim Chambers, Jonathan Morgan, Kylie Ireland, Gerry Pike, Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson, and Nick East

The credits roll easily on this movie and we see the names in red. Nothing too fancy here, your standard starting point, and we are led directly into the story. This features a tale like that of Archie Comics. I kid you not, it features Betty, Veronica, and Archie as the main characters. We see Jonathan Morgan with Eva Flowers and Jenna Jameson talking. They are discussing the good old days, and Morgan jumps into a sex story. 

Scene 1. Kim Chambers, Jonathan Morgan

Kim Chambers comes through with a bustline that gets Morgan all at attention. Chambers is a busty blonde with high heels that she keeps on throughout the course of the sex here. Chambers starts with oral on Morgan and you can tell he’s a pro, but he’s not exactly well endowed. He’s adequate here, and shaved, which is something you’ll start to see in the 1990s more often. Chambers and Morgan have sex on a couch, and while it is hardcore, you don’t really get that savage sex that you expect. The two have an adequate romp of sex, before getting a money shot. You don’t get to see a lot of Kim Chambers’ breasts, but she is wearing high heels, so there’s that for ya. Her hair is straight out of the 1980s and by this time Chambers has been around a long time, so of course you expect professionalism, and it shows. 

Plot point: Archie talks with Jughead and Reggie, and they talk about the good old days of college and how the women were. This leads to sex of course, in a non-story point. 

Scene 2. Kylie Ireland, Gerry Pike

Fans of Kylie Ireland will want to see her first major introduction into porn, and that’s what you get here. Kylie Ireland is a busty woman with brown hair here, and she gets ridden quite a bit by Gerry Pike. He is well endowed and the two are shot in a red light. The scene isn’t too much to write home about, and it works well enough. Pike does good with Ireland, and the two enjoy some freedom here, although with multiple positions, and a piano soundtrack, this is not a great scene. Ireland makes it watchable though, she’s always a blast to see. 

Scene 3. Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson

Forget the plot at this point, we don’t get much of it, as the trio of guys talks again. But that moves into Jameson and Flowers, Bettie and Veronica of this movie. The two are completely naked and start going at it together. This is a simple scene with a toy being involved, and the two working with that. If you’re a fan of lesbian sex, this will do the trick, but it’s really just clumsy. This is an adequate scene, but far from what you’d expect. 

Scene 4. Kim Chambers, Nick East

Fast forward through another plot point where the trio are just talking, and you get to see Jughead get in on some action. This time around it’s Kim Chambers again, and she gives a somewhat enthusiastic blow job before she gets on top of East and goes to work. The two have sex on a flowery looking couch, this time with full breasts showing and a good old fashioned momentum stealing sequence. The jazzy music make this interesting, and Chambers is a pro with East providing the pushing for the most part. It’s not a terrible scene, but unless you’re a big fan of Chambers, you’ll probably want to skip this one. 

Plot point: some jazzy music leads us to a discussion with Jonathan Morgan talking to Jameson and Flowers about eating a chocolate cake. I kid you not. It’s here that Bettie and Veronica want to team up with one another to show Archie what he’s missing, and that’s when the trio go to the bedroom for some fun. 

Scene 5. Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson, Jonathan Morgan

The main event in this movie is a threesome with Jonathan Morgan, Jenna Jameson and Eva Flowers. You get Bettie and Veronica here and of course Archie. Morgan isn’t huge, but you get an early scene with Jenna doing a lot of the heavy lifting here, including blowing Morgan and riding him all the same. This is not a long scene, and the jazzy music make it kind of interesting. It’s adequate at best, and you will get off if you try hard, but the scene is somewhat limited with camera work that leaves a lot to be desired, and well, a lackluster throw of sex. It’s a threesome, but not one that you’re going to remember, unless you’re a collector and want that early Jenna Jameson scene. 

Overall “Cherry Pie” is not a great movie at all. The plot is not there, despite the interesting cover, and well, who watches for the plot anyways? Besides me and this blog. 

I give “Cherry Pie” a 1 out of 5. 

Saturday, March 6, 2021

Texas Crude (1995) Review


We go back to the 1990s, and this time around we are looking at a movie that was distributed by Nitro Productions, and directed by Charles Rothstein. The movie stars Houston, Alec Metro, Valeria, Marc Wallice, Tom Byron, Vince Vouyer, Dallas Whitacker, Barbi Bond, Keisha, and Mike Horner. The movie is about a bar in Texas, and a wealthy tycoon wants to buy in. Will the bar sell out or will they stay put, on top of a fortune of ore? The movie has a simplified plot, and really is paper thin as per usual, and to be honest, it’s not well written. However, unlike my previous reviews, I take a look at the sex more than the story, because no one seems to care about the story, and fast forward to the raunch, right? Today we look at "Texas Crude".

The first thing you should know about this movie is that Houston is starring in it, that same Houston that did 620 men in the world’s biggest gang bang. The movie opens up with a simple strip tease, and we get moving fast into the nudity. Of course, that’s what you came for, right? 

Plotting starts with a group of lawyers in a room, being requested to purchase land that is sitting on a great deal of ore. The group adjourns, and we get moving straight forward into a hard wipe, and a bedroom scene. The room looks like a random hotel, and it isn’t that attractive, but it’s where we start with the sex. 

Scene 1. Houston, Alec Metro

Houstin has her hair in braids, like that of the Perfect 10 movie. If you’re familiar with that classic, then you know what her hair looks like here. ALec Metro wears a suit that is too big for him, but it starts to come off fast with Houston. Houston is a blonde with big breasts, and a thin waist. This is before she had a lot of other work done, so she is still somewhat young in this scene, and Metro is a veteran of sorts. 

The scene is somewhat standard, with the most provocative of moments the oral sequences with Metro getting blown, where as Houston getting eaten out isn’t exactly the best. She’s shaved, in that 1990s style, so if you’re a fan of that, you’ll likely be turned on here. However the sex is rudimentary, lacking that passion, it’s two machines, no passion, and well, somewhat interesting for the longer shots. This is standard sex, porno sex, multiple positions, and a money shot, no condom, and just a finish. If you’re a fan of Houston, then you may like this scene, otherwise, it’s just not that grand. Even if she is hot, there’s something missing. 

Metro’s script is hilarious, if you’re watching this for entertainment, he spews a few one liners, here and there, which are funny to consider, but overall just over the top. 

Plot Point 

The plot moves forward and we get more of the story. Two guys are looking to make a deal to buy out the owners. In between that we get to see the hiring process of a strip club. That leads to a stern conversation in the back of the club. Ms. Dallas Delight says Texas Crude is not for sale. The crux of this plot revolves around the buying of a strip club. There’s some seriously bad acting, bad jokes, and simplified lines. 

Scene 2. Valeria, Marc Wallice, Tom Byron

Next up we get a threesome in which Byron and Wallice are sent to arrest Valeria, a busty blonde. The fun starts with kissing in a backstage area of what is supposed to be the strip club/bar. Byron gets blown first, and that’s where your x-rating comes into play. This is a scene with minimal music, and a bit of sound overall. The sound design here is not half bad, but the lack of music is a bit odd considering this is a feature. There’s a good deal of foreplay for the plot, but once the sex gets moving forward, Valeria and the boys do a good job of making moves. Fans of close up sex will enjoy seeing the penetration go full force with Byron taking the lead overall. At one point Wallice is soft, so he’s not in frame. Valeria does anal after a certain point, and while there’s no double penetration, there’s enough to get you started up. Anal is somewhat limited before a money shot occurs, and she gets it on her face and pubic mound, which is not completely shaved. 

Plot point: Wallice and Byron cum and are busted by Dallas, she warns the cops that they are in trouble and will have to answer to a higher authority unless they scram. 

Meanwhile, Houston wants to dance and approaches Dallas and asks to get started asap. 

Scene 3. Dallas Whitacker, Vince Vouyer

Vouyer watches Dallas dance, and eventually gets in good with her, and the next sex point begins. Dallas is a nice, tight blonde with medium size breasts, and Vouyer is a pro here. The setting here is a bar, right on the stools and counter. The two proceed into oral, and while it’s not epic, it is serviceable. Dallas is ok, she has pretty looks, and gives head with slight enthusiasm, but you can tell that the chemistry here is lost somewhere. They are limited to how many positions they can go here, so you can expect limited sex, doggy, cowgirl, and the use of the bar stools and counters. Dallas has a nice body, but this is not a great sex scene if you ask me. It’s formulaic, and Vouyer even looks bored at one point. There’s a money shot and then that’s it, it’s all over.

Plot Point: Houston talks to Mr. BIg about buying the bar. We then move forward to the stage where two ladies are dancing and getting clapped for and cheered for. This has shotty camera work, slow motion, and piped in claps. It’s pretty lousy, but the set isn’t too bad here so that’s a plus. 

Scene 4. Dallas Whitacker, Houston

For fans of lesbian sex, the movie throws in this little tidbit. You get Houston with Dallas, and the two immediately start getting naked and going for it. You can tell that they are not fully bisexual, at least not with one another as the scene is slow, methodical, and somewhat tame in comparison to the rest. It’s very lackluster in terms of lesbian sex, and while it will get you there, it’s definitely lacking. Again there’s no soundtrack here, just the moaning, and mostly oral as you’d expect. This is a scene you’d probably fast forward, it lacks chemistry. 

Scene 5. Barbi Bond, Keisha, Mike Horner

Moving along, we are in the middle of another scene, the plot jumps to sex, and we get the final sex encounter. This time around it’s Barbi Bond, Keisha, and Mike Horner. Horner is a veteran of this stuff, and the two women are a dichotomy for you. One is a tight blonde and one is a brunette with nice hips and curly hair. The sex starts quickly with a blow job to horner, and then goes into lesbian sex. Lots of kissing and oral before Horner jumps in to have sex with the women and it’s not half bad. It’s a good ender, but it definitely is missing something. There’s a cum shot on Barbi Bond’s rear, and that’s it for the sex, a short sex scene to level things out. 

The plot thickens when Dallas and Houston catch Horner’s character. Horner is married so gets to moving along, and then we get the final moment, where Dallas and Houston breaks the news to Mr. Big, he gets the shaft and doesn’t get to buy the club. 

Texas Crude is a by the numbers porno movie, and one that I wouldn’t recommend. If you’re a big fan of Houston, then there you go, but other than that, this is somewhat mediocre and just kind of tiresome. 

I give “Texas Crude” a 1 out of 5 stars. 

Tuesday, November 10, 2020

Daydreams Nightdreams (1997) Review

 

And we are back, today we are looking into a 1997 movie that features director Bud Lee working for VCA studios, and filming some of the top names in the 1990s. “Daydreams Nightdreams” stars a good cast overall. The cast of this adult feature includes Kylie Ireland, Asia Carrera, Randy West, Missy, Mickey G. , Alex Sanders, Shayla LaVeaux, Mia Ciccero, Steve Drake, and Jill Kelly


The movie starts in an office, with a good amount of set design. We are in an office and our stars are working around a law office, with nothing major going on. We just look into paralegal stuff, and random notes that suggest that we are in a law office. This plot driven movie is simple enough to start with, nothing too sexual goes on, and we are treated to the cast “acting” somewhat. The camera and lighting are good, and the set design is adequate, giving you that feeling that you’re in a larger studio than just the average gonzo picture. You can see that this is a set, and not a fully occupied office, as there are moments when you can see the grip, and others in the background. We are then proven that this is a porno as things get into the scenes.


Midway through the movie a magician shows up, and he has magical powers to give our heroine a way to go into the dream world. That’s right, from an office to a dream world scenario of magic, we get an interesting twist. If you’re one to look for storyline, there’s some here for you.  


Scene 1. Kylie Ireland, Sean Rider


A file is missing, our office worker interrupts Sean Rider and Kylie Ireland. Ireland looks a lot like Jenna Jameson in her youth, so that’s something to take into consideration. She has large enhanced breasts, blonde hair, anSd that youthful look you expect from porno actresses in the 1997 era. The music starts and we go straight into cunnilingus with Sean Rider taking the helm with Ireland. The office set here is fine, the two go through a few positions, nothing crazy, and eventually Rider finishes on Ireland’s behind. If you’re a fan of Ireland, you’ll like her work here, and Rider is a clean cut dude with a strong focus, so he gets through the scene with gusto. 


Scene 2. Asia Carrera, Randy West


The movie shifts directly into the next sex scene, so don’t worry about the plot any longer. We immediately get Randy West and Asia Carrera in another sex scene. This one focuses a lot on Asia and West oral, more than anything else. If you’re a fan of oral, then you’ll like how this goes. There’s a fast transition into the sex, and West and Asia don’t do it for very long, and West is apro as usual, no condom, straight forward sex with Asia Carrera. The two go from office wall, to office desk, to black couch and several positions. This is not a terrible scene, and Carrera really works over West good, and eventually gets the finish with a hand job, and that’s that. 


Scene 3. Missy, Mickey G.


The story takes a back seat now as we get into our next scene of sex. Missy is a nice blonde with fake breasts, and Mickey G is a veteran of the porno world. The two go straight into oral, and then fingering, before going at it on a couch. The camera cuts in close and you get a normal methodology here. Doggy into other options, with some hair pulling to boot. Mickey G is a pro here, and Missy moans a great deal as she goes through the positions, After a while we get to see a little anal action, and then the finishing touch from Mickey G after a little bit of play. There’s a hard cut to the end, and it’s obvious it wasn’t all one take, but that doesn’t matter, does it? It’s an adequate scene. 


Scene 4. Shayla LaVeaux, Randy West


The next scene features Shayla LaVeaux and Randy West. There is some lead up, but the two get right into the sex. West is always a pro, and Shayla LaVeaux moans somewhat in this quick romp. The two have little chemistry together and it is adequate, at best. THe two have sex on a desk, then a couch before a money shot is given and we are out of there. This is a weaker scene, and while Shayla LaVeaux is nice to look at, it’s just a paint by numbers scene. 


Scene 5. Asia Carrera, Alex Sanders


In the dream world now we have a cuckolding scene where Randy West has to watch his former partner Asia get it on with Alex Sanders. The two get right to it and have fast sex on a bed in the dream world. Asia keeps mocking West, and the scene goes forward with straight sex, and fast paced movements. We get a money shot onto Asia’s stomach, and the end of the scene, in dream land. It’s adequate, but you can tell that it’s robotic for the most part. 


Scene 6. Jill Kelly, Kylie Ireland, Mia Ciccero, Sean Rider


Another dreamworld option we get Sean RIder taking on three women at once, and he does an ok job with it, and the other women are there for eye candy as well. This is a condom scene, with an interesting bed layout, set, and lighting. It’s straight forward, Rider takes turn with Jill Kelly, Kylie Ireland, and Mia Ciccero. We get a money shot on Ireland’s chest, and then we move along to an all female scene. This was ok at best. 


Scene 7. Jill Kelly, Juli Ashton, Kylie Ireland, Shayla LaVeaux


A four way scene is shown next, and we get strap ons and lots of oral. If you’re a fan of lesbian sex, then you’ll like the movies momentum here. It’s a good solid scene, and the women, even though it seems like they are phoning it in at times, do a good job of providing eye candy overall and that’s what the movie is for, right? 


Scene 8. Shayla LaVeaux, Steve Drake


THe last scene is a pink lit scene with Shayla LaVeaux and Steve Drake. It’s an adequate scene, as it is just straight forward sex, with lots of intimacy up front, kissing, and petting before getting into the action. Drake wears a condom in this one, and it’s not that great, as the two are robotic in their endeavors. It’s an adequate scene, and there’s some good moments, but the rock soundtrack and lighting really take me away from the scene. 


Overall, “Daydreams Nightdreams” gets a 3 out of 5.


Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Guilty As Sin (1996) Review

Guilty as Sin (1996)
It took me a long time to get back into the swing of things. I have been working a lot, and have been pursuing a doctorate degree, and just found myself focusing on reading, writing, and other areas of interest. Today, we are going to be looking at a movie from 1996. This movie came out in 1996, and it is 93 minutes long. It was directed by Jim Enright, and distributed by Klimaxxx Productions. This movie features some great actors, so I am intrigued by the initial line up. This movie is called, “Guilty as Sin”, and it stars Missy, Mickey G, TT Boy, Nadia Moore, Precious Silver, Peter North, Alex Dane, Alex Dane, Celine Devoux, Blake Mitchell, and Jonathan Morgan. At the time of this movie’s filming around January of 1996, I was only 13 years old, so I did not see it until recently. Some of my personal favorite adult stars are in this movie, and they include TT Boy, Peter North, and Jonathan Morgan. Steve Drake, that rascal is here too, and of course a line up of women that came and went, and didn’t make a big splash like some other featured women on this site. But that’s the world of adult movies, hit and miss, and hope.

You ever wonder who the custodian of records is for these movies? The opening of this movie has a slow starting point, where you hear nothing, see nothing, but get that warning that the custodian of records has all the files on all of the performers, because they are all of age, etc.

The movie starts with three women talking. A secretary comes into an office and is talking about a new client. The new client is a blonde haired woman, and she said that she heard the attorney is the best and she needs the best. She’s in the worst running suit, and it’s hilarious. The office looks like your average set, grey carpeting, a book shelf, some books, a random credential, and a piece of Thomas Kincade art in the background. A desk, and brown bookshelf, and the lighting of course is coming from two angles, so the shadows are showcasing where the lighting rigs are. I’m trying to see if there’s a boom mic in the shot, but the editor did a good job of framing this enough to not see it, but I know it’s up there, and if you’re careful, you can catch the sound bouncing through it.

The blonde tells the attorney that she needs her, and the attorney said she doesn’t need anyone if she hasn’t been arrested or taken in for questioning yet. The blonde tries to convince the lawyer, but the attorney is not having it, until the blonde tells her a little more about her story, and that she has an alibi that has stopped her from killing her man. She says she has her own money, so there’s no way she could’ve killed her husband. When she starts that, the attorney sits down and starts to listen to a story, where we get a hard cut, and into the first scene of adult material.

We cut to a backyard swimming pool. There is a single camera shot looking in on Mickey G floating on a pool bed, and Missy comes through. She walks in with a bikini, but the frame of the shot is so uneven, you can barely see her get into the frame. The director has this shot framed horribly, and the sunlight is so bright, the backyard is washed out, the colors not grand. Missy is a thin, dirty blonde, and has that California tan. Missy gets down to the pool and starts to blow Mickey G immediately, without any interlude, and a hard camera cut, straight to the close up of her blowing him directly. I’m not a fan of the framing of this scene at all. The centering is all off, and the weight is positioned in an odd manner. Mickey G. begins giving Missy oral after she blows him for a while, and the two have basic chemistry, but nothing too grand. Missy’s make up is on point, non-reflective, and her blonde hair has roots that come through as the camera focuses in and out of the closeups. Mickey G. is unkempt and is playing a macho role here. Missy has long legs, that California, blonde, slightly tan but not really too pasty skin tone. The two get out of the pool and use the flotation device to go into more positions. Fans of Missy will find this performance to be adequate, as Mickey G goes through the motions of each position, his arm behind his back because the camera is right on the two as they try to have sex. This scene is quick, and ends with a cum shot on Missy’s face, as she moans. This is not a grand scene, but it’s straight sex, no condoms, and for the outdoors, safe in terms of fantasy land.

We go back to the attorney’s office where Missy talks about what is going on with the case. They talk about how an open marriage, and that they allowed one another to love others as well. Just then, Jonathan Morgan storms in and gives Missy a warrant for arrest. Then the attorney finally says she’ll be her client. Dana, is her name, and the acting here is horrible, with the exception of Jonathan Morgan. Morgan says that the woman shot her husband with a shotgun, and she’s guilty.

We move forward to an office building where Steve Drake and our attorney start to talk. They talk about what things are had by the client. The acting here isn’t too bad, not great, but the dialogue works well. The office here is an obvious set, with bad lighting, but Drake does well here as an evil attorney.

Another hard cut and we are nearly 20 minutes into the porno, and the plot thickens. We see a press release, then we get two women sitting in bed and talking more plot. Missy’s accused of murder, Steve Drake is the evil lawyer, and things keep moving forward, with lots of dialogue. That alone elevates this movie past minor porno status, and instead gives it a full 2 stars extra just for the plot, dialogue, and storyline.

Soft cut here, and we get Missy talking to her lawyer again. The two discuss the pieces of the case. This time we are in Missy’s house, but she’s wearing the same wardrobe as before. During this scene, Missy and her attorney discusses the relationship that Missy has with Charlie. Charlie is played by Peter North, mind you. It’s here that we transition to the next sex scene, and the director throws us into the mess.

We go back outside, and Missy is sitting on a park bench while TT Boy is over her, getting blown. The music starts, and it’s saxophone heavy, with TT Boy showcasing his prowess, and Missy putting on a show for Peter North, who plays the voyeur, or the cuck, depending on how you view this type of thing. Missy and TT Boy have a lot more chemistry than Mickey G did with her, and it shows. Missy rides him in various positions, and he gets really into it towards the end, giving Miss a great deal for the somewhat short scene all things considered. Meanwhile, Peter North sits and watches, and eventually TT Boy cums on Missy’s face, and positions her a bit further from him to get the first launch, which is fine, but not grand. It’s an ok scene, better than the first, that’s for certain.

The lawyer asks Missy if Charlie (Peter North) ever had other women, and that’s when the screen fades, and we see three women enter a room, and present themselves to North. Meanwhile, Missy watches from the corner of a badly decorated set. The show here starts immediately with terrible elevator rock music, that sounds all synth heavy. Nadia Moore, and Precious Silver are the actresses, and they are both skinny, model types, with enhanced breasts, and pretty faces. Both have darker hair, and are a contrast to missy’s blonde hair. The camera goes back and forth between solo action with Missy, to Peter North immediately getting blown and moaning. The set design here sucks, alongside with the lighting, which casts bad shadows all over the scene from overhead lighting. But as far as the sex is concerned, it’s not half bad, although North seems to be in work mode, while the women just go through the motions. You can tell the lighting is coming from the fourth wall, as the shadows give away the set details. As for titillation, the women put on a clinic of how to give ladies oral, meanwhile, North does his best to keep it up. The sex is as sterile as a brothel visit. This is not North’s best work, and Nadia and Precious seem to just be willing participants in a scene where they are more interested in each other, including one woman with a hood piercing. The music is horrible though, the set has green walls, and the camera is all over the place, so good luck with this one. Oh, and how can I forget, there’s a Peter North facial onto a tongue ring, and well, he doesn’t exactly drop a big load here, so if you’re looking for the best of North, this is not the scene for you.

We get back to the house that the attorney was in with Missy. The two start to discuss how many partners one another had. The two women continue to converse, and we get a scene where the attorney is driving. I kid you not, this is a legit movie, although B-level or C-level, but there’s structure here that you do not get with a lot of movies.

The lawyer shows up to her home and walks in, only to find Jonathan Morgan to be in her bed. The two argue about why she took the case. Morgan is a detective, mind you, and the two keep talking about the case, and how one thinks the client is guilty. Morgan gets thrown out of her house, in the worst acting job in the movie thus far.

A soft fade and we go to a court room scene. This is actually done well, and there’s even some non-sex actors in this! I love those! I was in one once. Anyways, this turns into a court room drama, and we get into the best dialogue, and attempts to act. If you are one to watch full movies, rather than just fast forward to sex, you’ll be delighted by the acting job done here. Except for the fact that the attorney here is just reading aloud, not from memory. The judge as well isn’t really taking it seriously, and why would he? It’s a porno, right? A witness is called to the stand, and it’s Alex Dane.

A hard cut takes us into the bedroom of Alex Dane and Peter North. Dane is a skinny, small breasted, brunette, and she immediately begins with a blow job on Peter North. The music here is horrendous, and the set design is actually straight of the 1980s. The flowery brown couch, the hardwood flooring, white piano, and terrible contrast of color and design makes me laugh. Dane and North have a bit of chemistry, especially Dane who really seems to get into the act of giving North a good scene. The two have sex on a brown couch with flowery patterns, and a reddish background, a thrift store find if you ask me. The sex goes through several instances, and positions, with North maintain speed, and precision eventually going through anal. It’s apparent that Dane isn’t that into it, but the scene calls for it, so it goes forward. The music is synth heavy, and it’s fake horns here, and it’s horrible. It’s louder than the sex sounds, which have Dane moaning and North just breathing heavily. After some time, North finishes on Dane’s chest, and that’s that. This is bland. Very little chemistry, and just run of the mill in terms of lighting, and camera work. It’s lazy if you ask me.

Missy shows up and sees the two after they’ve had sex, and she’s upset.

The movie goes forward with the court case, and Drake keeps pushing the witness, and we get moving forward into Drake’s office. Here we see a blonde in a red dress talking to our prosecutor. The two start kissing, and soft music starts. Celine Devoux is the actress here, and she looks like Topanga from “Boy Meets World”, with her hair done like her, thick thighs, and skin tone that draws you in. The set here again is bland, but it’s done up to look like a cheap lawyer’s office or a motel, for that matter. The lighting sucks again, and I’m wondering who green lit this thing, but it’s a porno, so I guess I shouldn’t complain. Devoux and Drake begin with foreplay, and Drake giving some breast play to start. Devoux’s chest is natural, from what I can tell, but then again, this is 1996, maybe they aren’t? I don’t know, I should know. She has cake makeup, is trimmed, and the camera goes right into the tongue and labia, so if you’re a fan of oral, or want to learn, Drake seems to put on a clinic with the foreplay and oral. Drake uses his fingers, mouth, and more to get the first initial climax, and the camera moves lower to show you different angles, and I take back my comment about Devoux’s chest not being enhanced. The sex starts, and it’s casual, nothing crazy, reverse cowgirl, couch sex, Devoux moaning, and for the most part, it’s just run of the mill. I can’t really say it’s terrible, but it’s apparent that Drake and Devoux do not match chemistry, but rather are doing the job. Devoux is a blonde haired stripper type, and if that’s your thing, enjoy. Otherwise, you’re going to get distracted by the lack of chemistry, if that’s what you’e looking for. At the 72 minute mark, there’s anal, and that’s where the scene takes a tonal shift, with the two actually seeming to love what they do, so kudos on that. A cum shot on the chest of Devoux, and that’s the end of the scene.

Drake gets a phone call, and it’s Jonathan Morgan saying that there’s another murder. This time it’s a young man, and it’s another shotgun killing.

The movie then moves forward, and we get to see what really is happening. The attorney talks to Missy, and we then go to a room where Missy is talking to someone on the phone, yelling. The phone is tapped, and we are seeing the end of this story unfold. Missy is in on an extortion plot, she throws the phone down and pulls out a gun, and grabs a leather jacket, this thing is turning into a revenge thriller!

The plot finally thickens, and I’m all in here. A detective is on her tail, and we get some thriller type music, as she pulls up to a house, under the cover of night, to see Peter North come out in a suit, and he’s not dead afterall! North says that the two can run away together. The attorney shows up, talks her out of it, and right before she shoots North, a detective shows up and that’s the end. The whole story wraps up with a detective and our attorney.

Up to this point I didn’t want to name the attorney, because I’m lazy. It’s Blake Mitchell, a short haired redhead, with large breasts. Jonathan Morgan and her begin to kiss on the set of her apartment, and begin with breast play. The oral sex on this scene is good, and Morgan sure has some initial skills with Mitchell, which I definitely appreciated, considering this movie seems to lack in the sex department at times. The camera hides behind a plant at one point, which is hilarious to me. This apartment is designed like the worst Ikea in the world, mind you. The sex begins with a condom on, mind you, the first condom I’ve seen in this whole movie. We start with doggy style, and it’s ok at best. Mitchell moans, and Morgan concentrates, but you can tell that it’s just pure concentration, and nothing more. We switch to another position, Morgan on top and going forward as fast as he can, and then leading to an end of a cum shot on Mitchell’s triple D breasts, which the camera makes look enormous with the angle they choose.

The camera fades, and we get the end, that’s it. The end sequence, and a finish line for the movie.

“Guilty As Sin” was not my favorite movie in terms of sex. But as far as a full movie, with a script, with lots of dialogue, editing, sequencing, and full plot, this is a stellar example of what can be done with a minor budget, for a sex movie. It’s a movie I could see in theaters, and enjoy enough not to finish myself off within the first scene. That’s a special kind of porno movie, isn’t it? Well, it’s something alright.

I give “Guilty As Sin” a 3 out of 5.

You can buy, stream, and download “Guilty As Sin” from 1996, and see extras, and maybe even give it a better rating by clicking here!

Saturday, April 13, 2019

Coed Fever (1980) Review

Coed Fever (1980)
Today we are getting back to our time machine and we are going back to 1980. We are going to be seeing a Cabellero Home Video million copy seller, as it was a huge hit for the company in 1980. “Coed Fever” was released in 1980, and it had a lot of solo acts, and 19 overall sex scenes. It was directed by Robert McCallum, and it features some heavy hitters. Some of the names that are in this include Terri Dolan, Aaron Stuart, Serena, R.J. Reynolds, Lisa De Leeuw, Jamie Gillis, Piper Smith, Gloria Harrison, Vanessa del Rio, Michael Morrison, Ron Jeremy, Samantha Fox, John Leslie, Lysa Thatcher, Brooke West, Terri Dolan, Jon Martin, Annette Haven, Eric Stein, Don Fernando, and Paul Baressi, just to name as many as I could. There’s a lot going on here, and the movie is only 89 minutes long. This really feels like a movie that was meant to be seen in movie theaters, and it shows. It really pushes that envelope from the start, with sex being the biggest thing, at least with my copy of the film.

The movie begins with a pixie haired dirty blonde with small breasts, not shaved, and Aaron Stuart with a late 1970s hair cut and mustache. No one’s shaved here, and it gets straight into a blow job as the clothes start to come off. The film grain is here, you know this was on the silver screen. The set is a kitchen, and the two actors get into the sex, showing off no condoms, and the classic push of the 1980s. The sex has a lot of edits, a lot of cuts, and a lot of facial expressions, so you go back and forth with the close ups, and then the penis and the vagina, with lots of hair everywhere. Eventually, Stuart cums on the pub ic hair of Terri Dolan, and starts the movie off with straight forward sex. These two are not young coeds, that’s for sure.

We have a cut and we end up going to a sorority house where we see girls talking. Then we go to a frat house where some dudes start talking and that’s it. A lot of exterior shorts are shown, and we see a variety of men and women talking. This is a full movie with sets, and film grain, it’s simple. The dean calls for the women to come over, and we just get moving forward like a 1980s college flick. If you’ve seen one of those, then you know that the movie is about the guys against the evil Dean of the School. We see that the Dean is going to have a photo shoot that is going to do a story on the sorority, but they have to ditch their men. The Sorority lead talks to the girls and says that they need to date only good men.

We are sent to a date, where a man named Joey and a girl talk about doing it, and the guy is getting rejected. This is a break up date. The woman breaks up with ole Joey, and he starts throwing chairs, and gets really upset. Meanwhile we see the waiter going mad, and miming his disinterest.

The scene cuts to Serena and R.J Reynolds in a gym. Serena is a red haired girl, and she gets on her hands and knees to start sucking off Reynolds, and that’s it. There’s no sound, there’s no artistic elements, just hard light from the left, and the sounds of sucking.

The movie then shifts to another couple in a sauna, and they are talking about how they need to break up. The movie moves along and we see others break up before we are sent back to Serena and Reynolds in a very basic sex scene. It’s like watching two parents or a long time couple have sex, very little passion, not a lot of moaning, just him on top, and moving forward on gym mats. There’s romantic music, the lighting sucks, and there’s little to no “passion” here, it’s just straight forward, with a basic movement. The best part here is that Reynolds go down on Serena and she really gets into it, and that’s where she starts to moan, and we get to see a better sequence of sex.

The break ups continue, and we get more of the story. We are hearing about the future of the sorority and the frats and dating. It’s a story driven movement, and we are introduced to other characters along the way. This movie is swift, we are 22 minutes into this movie, and we haven’t seen a lot of sex just yet, but there’s a lot of story. It’s ok at best.

Moving forward, we are taken to a threesome that happens after a couple of guys go to a bar.

THis scene, from what I can gather includes Piper Smith, Gloria Harison, and Jamie Gillis. Terrible music begins, and one of the other guys starts watching, and Gillis starts to eat out one of the women, and then one of them rides him, and his face. The two girls are blondes, there’s some smooth jazz that comes through, and away we go through another sex scene, with bad lighting, and random moments of sex. There’s some good moments with a blow job, having two blonde haired women blow Gillis is good, and they seem into it completely. The movie continues with bad lighting, bad shadows, and what appears to be a swing set? After some time, there’s a facial and that’s it. This was ok at best, the women were a little more into it, but it wasn’t grand to say the least.

After the scene, we get to another part of the movie, two guys and a laundry truck. The two guys have a plot to work with and are talking about delivering some new detergent, but it’s really poison. They knock out a woman, drag her upstairs, and replace her with someone else.

Ron Jeremy and Michael Morrison talk about how they want to get moving forward with taking pictures and getting forward progression on the story. Vanessa del Rio is there and giving the guys a tour, and Jeremy keeps saying that he can’t contain himself. After the trio look into a random bedroom, they decide that they need to get it on. Jeremy gets down on his knees and gives del Rio oral while Morrison gets blown, and the smooth jazz comes over again. If you’re a fan of del Rio than you will like this, it’s average at best. Jeremey and Morrison work well in the doubles, but eventually Jeremy cums onto del Rio’s breasts, and Morrison goes soft, allowing this to finish off.

The Dean shows up and catches del Rio, and then chases her out. The Sorority house gets made, and they aren’t sure how to move forward. They say that people will be getting in trouble if they don’t fess up to who is responsible.

As the movie progresses we see another couple, this time it’s John Leslie naked on a bed with Samantha Fox blowing him. There’s no sound again, just the sound of the blow job. This leads straight into sex, and it’s Leslie on top, and he’s going in and out, with Fox’s legs up.

The movie continues and the Dean is mad, and he starts plotting how to move forward. We are at the 54 minute mark at this point.

Moving along we see a random dude scoping out the sorority, meanwhile, a couple of women are doing it together. There’s a simple scene with Lysa Thatcher and Tawny Pearl. A brunette and a blonde just having fun together, lesbian sex, lots of oral, fingers, and forward progress. There’s a slow moving bass line, and we see the guy come inside the room to see it all happen.

Up next there’s a sorority initiation, and we see Tawny Pearl, Lysa Thatcher, Brooke West, Smantha Fox, and Terri Dolan all getting spanked while they play with vibrators. This is a sorority initiation and it’s quite sexy.

We move forward and find out that the sorority found out who was causing the problems with the Dean. That made Annette Haven, Samantha Fox and Paul Baressi engaging in a threesome which features sex and a paddle, then a strap on dildo with some strong elements. There’s a sense of punishment in this arena, and it’s a domme sex scene that borders on violence at times. It’s not my favorite scene, but it progresses the plot, so in that arena, I guess it’s ok. It’s a threeway overall and at some point Paul Baressi cums on and rubs his penis all over the brunette, and that’s that.

Some soft music plays, and we see the movie progress to a date again. This time Brooke West and Jon Martin are talking, and they simply talk about how they want to do it. That leads to another plot point, before we end up in a soft sex scene, with West and Martin. Brooke is a brunette girl next door looking woman, and Martin is a nerd, and well, the sex is ok at best. It’s soft, it doesn’t get a lot of movement, the lighting is horrendous, and they do it on a carpet, and well, it’s just not great at all. It looks clumsy as hell.

The climax and ending of the movie features the coeds having sex at the mansion of the Dean, and the camera guy and article writer get in on the action, as the jazz music comes through and we are treated to a little disco, and a cum shot to finish things off, nothing that great, but just a finish.

At the end of the day, there’s a lot going on in this story driven movie. It’s more story than sex, that’s for sure. There are some funny moments, and it’s hilarious to see how things work through the elements, including a little gay nod at the end.

I give “Co Ed Fever” a 2 out of 5.


It was hard to review this one because the editing was so bad, but it worked for what it was. It’s like a 90s or 80s sex comedy, with hardcore in it, the sex is not passionate, you sometimes don’t see penetration because of the lighting, and it really seems like a movie that played as a double feature to a better porno, but then again, that’s what you get with the 1980s, right?

Tuesday, March 26, 2019

Vendetta (2017) Review

Vendetta (2017) DVD and Poster 
Today we are going modern. We are going to venture into something that I don’t do often, and that’s going forward into something newer. With that in mind, let’s venture to the year 2017, April 2017 when a 95 minute movie from Wicked Pictures came out and started to win some serious awards. This is very much a high budget production, but that doesn’t mean that it has the film grain that I love. It is filmed in HD, but it’s still very much soap opera or Netflix style camera work. It is NOT like what you would see on the big screen, even from the golden era of porn. That doesn’t make it bad, it’s just a fact that I saw from the opening sequencing. It’s on par with a Mexican soap opera at times. This movie is called "Vendetta", and it is directed by Stormy Daniels, and is released by Wicked Pictures. The stars of this movie includes Asa Akira, Kleio Valentien, Stormy Daniels, Kenzie Taylor, Lucas Frost, Brendon Miller, Marcus London, Kimber Woods, and Michael Vegas. It’s not a long movie, but it has a plot that is going to be worth checking out for some, and for others, it will be another movie that they skip to the sex scenes, because afterall this is a porno, right?

Before jumping into the viewing, I want to look at the synopsis. In this movie, Celeste, our main character is left with a rich husband that is stuck in a wheelchair. She needs to find pleasure, and he can’t give it to her. The husband gets mad, and hires a private eye, and that creates some serious problems, as the woman is actually someone much more dangerous than he ever knew, hence the name, Vendetta. Fun, right?

Let’s get into the movie, roll it!

The opening scene shows Stormy Daniels riding a horse, and it’s legit her. She can ride, and that’s really cool. Daniels is a tall blonde, and she rides this horse with care, the camera editing enjoying her movements. She’s busty here, but she’s fully covered up, as she rides through the ups and downs of riding for sport. We are introduced to Celeste and her man, and we see how terrible the acting truly is. Stormy Daniels comes down the stairs, her husband just hanging out, and that’s it. She says she is going to leave, and decides to just take off. The husband calls someone and says she’s doing it again. She jumps in a car with Asa Akira, and away we go.

We then see the women driving to an undisclosed location, and then we see them pair up and find another woman and go into a bathroom. There’s red lighting here, and a sign that says that it’s a bathroom, as it says “toilet”, in case you’re not smart enough to pick up on it. The three women are at a club or somewhere, because the bathroom is lit with a red light, red light district type of thing. We see the tall blonde in Stormy Daniels, and we see Asa Akira a beautiful Asian woman, and Kleio Valentien a tall, tattooed blonde, and the three start to kiss and giggle, and then get into sex. The trio go through some standard lesbian sex, and then bring out toys for the camera to see. The camera work and editing here is ok, but the techno beat, the red lighting, and the constant cuts hurt my head. The moaning, and the process works well, and the women are beautiful, including wearing heels, tight dresses, and more. However, there’s a lack of something, that “it” factor, although the women use toys, go through DP with them, the confines of a bathroom doesn’t lend itself well enough for this scene to really get off the ground.

After the club scene, we then see Stormy Daniels and Asa Akira talking about random things. They try to act, and it’s not terrible. The makeup job on these women is really good. The camera editing is good, the conversation is bland, and we see the women supposedly at a restaurant, but it’s not that great at all. The set design leaves something to be desired. Meanwhile, as the women leave, there’s a random voyeur taking shots of them, most likely the private eye. The husband here is the same guy from the movie “Stupid Cupid” by the way! It’s Kyle Stone!

We are in a backyard now. We see Celeste and her husband just talking and having breakfast. The two argue about whether she has been faithful or not, and that makes her storm off. He starts to dial his phone and call a detective and say that he doesn’t know what to do. He then calls his lawyer. The lawyer then turns around after talking on the phone, and we get into a new sex scene.

The lawyer here is played by Kenzie Taylor. SHe’s a tall blonde with large breasts, tattoos, and a nice makeup job. She has large fake breasts, and invites Lucas Frost to kiss her and start to get through the motions of sex. Taylor takes her top off, as Lucas pulls her skirt down and underwear, before starting to give her oral. She’s pale, has a French tip manicure, and is quite sexy here. She has a full pubic mound of hair, and Lucas begins to use his fingers and tongue to get through the intiial warming of Taylor’s vagina, including making her cum at the 21 minute mark. She moans, and he continues, and this is one hell of a start to a scene. As far as looks are concerned, Taylor looks like a high end escort, and performs with a certain magnitude that you’d expect from them. Lucas Forst is not a big guy, he doesn’t have a giant penis, and is shaved completely. We get into deep throat here, and while it’s adequate, he seems to be in mechanical mode for the most part. A condom gets put on, and the sex begins, with that robotic push at first, but after a blow job that wasn’t half bad, it’s a welcome point of interest. It almost looks like there are two condoms being put on here, but it’s something that I can’t really qualify as a truth. It just looks that way to me. Taylor moans a great deal, keeps her garters on, and her stockings, as the positions shift from the desk, moving forward. The camera stays close enough, and the movie continues to the eventual cum shot in the face, and that’s that, nothing too complex, nothing too exciting, but rather just status quo for adult cinema in the modern era. I did appreciate the set being more than a warehouse and the dialogue moving the story along, but the rest was somewhat ordinary, for lack of a better term.

We move forward with a fade to black. Stormy Daniels and Asa Akira are having lunch on a balcony overlooking the Hollywood Hills. This is a house that is supposed to be a restaurant, but it really is just a home. Stormy Daniels goes to make a call in the bathroom, and she looks in the mirror, her husband calling her to find out where she is. She returns to the lunch table, and talks to Asa Akira. The two go through some boring dialogue about how if you cheat a lot you’ll get caught. They talk about how Celeste’s husband is dealing with being in a wheel chair and that things are tough.

We fade to black again, and then see Stormy Daniels in a full horse riding suit with Brendon Miller. Miller is a tattooed, hard looking guy, and Stormy looks great in a riding outfit. The two start to kiss a bit, and undress, showing off Stormy’s large breasts, and full figure. She’s blonde, she’s got a large frame, and she is definitely a hot blonde. The clothes come off and Stormy gets eaten out by Brendon Miller, with slow strokes of the tongue, as there is no music playing, and you get that high definition modern porn look into what is going on. Stormy gets on top for sex, and Miller has a condom on, she moves in and out with ease, doing a lot of the work up and down, and around, the two having a bit more than mechanical sex, with some kissing to boot. The two go through various positions, and end up doing well here, with Stormy making it seem like she’s really into the sex, including anal at one point. The anal option isn’t bad, but condoms are still in play. Eventually we get a cum shot into Stormy’s mouth, and she sucks Miller offer after the fact, which is always a fun thing to watch and experience. Stormy here is looking more like Janine because of a tattoo that she has around her pubic area and waist, alongside tattoos in other areas. She definitely is an alt girl here, and the sex, while interesting at times, is formulaic with Stormy just playing the role and not truly showcasing the passion that you’d want from a real sexual experience. Sure, it works, sure Miller cums, but he’s not a big guy, and the two work well enough to make the movie work well moving forward, but it’s just lacking something, and I think it’s passion. There are moments where it is really good, don’t get me wrong, and if you’re a fan of Stormy Daniels, you’ll like how she moves her body for this scene, as there are some great points.

After we see this, we go to a bar. At this bar we see Stormy and Asa talking about how someone’s trying to kill Stormy’s character. She says, that her husband has hired someone to kill her, and so here we go, the plot thickens a bit. Asa Akira goes over to the hitman that is sitting at the corner of the bar. Akira starts talking about how she thinks he’s Michael, and said that if he was Michael she was going to have sex with him.

Outside, we see Stormy and a random dude, and unfortunately her car has broken down. She agrees to go with him to a hotel. Meanwhile on the other side of the parking lot is Asa Akira, and she is in all black, talking to the hitman, and making out on a car.

Asa Akira is an asian woman with black hair, slim, and has large breasts, she gets her breasts exposed during the make out session, then Marcus London takes his pants off as she crouches down. It’s dark, but you can see he gets hard right away, and Akira starts to suck him off, going as hard as she can as he groans a bit. Akira continues to do this as the camera gets close and then pulls away, showing off Akira’s skill here. She’s quite enthusiastic overall, and really puts on a show until London cums in her face, and ends the scene. I guess he wasn’t the hitman after all?

The scene resets and we see Celeste, played by Stormy and the real hitman get behind closed doors. There’s a slight fade to black, before we see the guy poor some Woodford Reserve or Gentleman Jack, and the two start to drink. They sip whiskey, neat, and just look to be getting ready to get a little more comfortable. A donnybrook breaks out, and the two start to fight a bit, and there’s some sexual tension, before Celeste gets the better of the dude, and she chokes him out with a painting. After some time, she gives the guy a triangle choke hold before grabbing a vase and shattering it over his head. She knocks the dude out, and leaves him alone in the room.

The scene fades to black and we are taken to another room, this time it’s daylight and there are two people making out.

Kimber Woods has small breasts, black hair, and looks to be having a lot of fun with Michael Vegas. Vegas takes her top off and then starts to use his hands to please her, before taking off her pants and giving her more pleasure. The set here looks like a trailer park, with a green couch, and a random setup. This is an odd turn, but the sex is actually better than the rest of the movie. Vegas has a condom on, and he really goes far with Kimber, including nearly making her squirt at one point. This is the best sex scene in the movie, and by the time Vegas cums, it’s definitely warranted after the work he puts in to make Kimber moan and nearly scream at some point. Kimber is a nice girl, pretty, and wears heels for this, so if you’re a fan, you’ll love the sexual chemistry that Vegas and Kimber bring out together.

After the sex, we see Stormy Daniels show up, and pay off a woman to help with killing off her husband, at least that’s what we seem to be getting here. The scene ends and we see Celeste pointing a gun in the face of her husband. This last scene goes forward with finishing off the plot, and it involves a great deal of dialogue. After some time explaining, Celeste shoots her husband and away we go, the end.

I give “Vendetta” a 3 out of 5.

While I appreciate the cinematography, and attempts at better acting, I can only say that the sex isn’t that good. Stormy Daniels can write, act, ride horses, and make a good modern porno. It’s modern, it has a story that’s somewhat compelling, and it features enough sexual gusto to make it somewhat entertaining for a pornographic movie. Daniels is beautiful, I like her voice too, but in terms of sex, I can’t really recommend this one more than 3 out of 5. There are two stand out scenes in terms of sex, and the rest is story and somewhat mechanical. However, if you’re a fan of Stormy Daniels, and you like to see her in action, then you’ll want to check this one out for sure, it’s modern and it’s high budget.

Thursday, March 14, 2019

John Leslie's Night Shift Nurses (1987) Review

John Leslie's Nightshift Nurses
Today, we go back to a topic that is near and dear to my heart. We talk about porno and nurses, and the original elements that made me raise an eyebrow when I was going through puberty. There’s something about nurses and sex, even to this day, and while the uniforms are all different now, I still think fondly of them for various reasons. Today we are going back to 1987, for a movie about some hard working medical staff, and the men they help. This movie is called “Night Shift Nurses” and it’s from 1987. The movie stars Dana Dylan, Lynn Franciss, Joey Silvera, D.J. Cone, Steve Henessey, Keisha, Jose Duval, John Leslie, Siobhan Hunter, Peter North, Bionca, and Lois Ayres. Some of these names you know, and some of them will be new, as they weren’t that famous, but hey, it’s 1987, and the VHS revolution was just gaining steam in the adult video world, so you probably didn’t buy this one, you rented it. Directed by John Leslie, “Night Shift Nurses” is another one of those nurse movies your dad probably hid on betamax.

The beginning of this movie is not pornographic. It shows a janitor mopping a floor, very much like you would expect from a horror movie. The camera is low, and you see a man mopping, and that’s it. There’s nothing sensual, nothing extreme, just a man mopping the floor, and just doing his job. There’s film grain here. There’s a nod to cinematography initially, but the lack of cuts and stationary camera, reminds you that this is not Hollywood, outright. I do appreciate the lighting, shadows, and set design, as this is certainly a hallway set, not just a random warehouse, without ceilings.

The opening sequence takes a turn. The janitor looks into a crack in a door way, and sees a doctor and two nurses. They are Dana Dylan, and Lynn Franciss, and the doctor is none other than Joey Silvera. There’s nothing shaved here, Silvera has full pubic hair, and he’s rock hard to start, but he’s not a big guy, as I may have stated before. We have a contrast in women, both slim, medium sized breasts, equally as pretty, one brunette and one blonde, and they kiss, suck, and make sure that Silvera stays in the moment. Meanwhile, the janitor starts to get hard, and puts his hands down his pants, as the camera juxtaposes manual stimulation, with Silvera and the nurses getting into a threesome behind closed doors. The sex starts with Silvera getting sucked off by one nurse, while he kisses another, and that’s enough gusto to get this movie rolling into what it is, a porno. Silvera here is golden, the women do their roles well, and the sex is swift, the editing is fast, and you really end up seeing both the sex, and the solo act all in the same scene, with a mix between the two. The brunette in this one is great, she rides silvera and seems like a natural against the blonde, but both definitely do work with Silvera. Meanwhile, Steve Henessey is outside the doorway masturbating. The trio have sex in a small room, with blue walls, and odd lighting, and yet it has a sexy quality to it that you cannot deny. There is anal around the 3 minute mark, mind you, so if you’re a fan of anal, there’s a few sequences of that.

Meanwhile the janitor is watching, and a nurse comes up on him to look at what he’s doing. The camera shows a very blonde, tall woman, and she just watches the janitor, and he of course looks into the room. While in doggy, the brunette and the janitor lock eyes, and the two have a moment while Silvera continues to anal. Silvera cums on the brunette’s lower back, and the janitor cums while the nurse keeps watching, and that knocks out two scenes in one edit.

The cool thing for me about this movie is that it’s dubbed in Spanish! Score me! I love when porno comes to me dubbed. The blonde from the hallway talks to an admin and he talks about how his staff needs to be up to snuff. The nurses are all busty, have big 1980s hair. The set here looks like a legit hospital, with admin files, overhead lighting, and shadows that you’d expect, but of course, it’s a set. The head nurse said that there is going to be an inspection later today, and that no one is going to lose their job. There’s a good overall plot point here, and that’s something that you’ll definitely note as something interesting. The movie goes to another room, and it’s the janitor cleaning, meanwhile Joey Silvera shows up to talk to him. Silvera says he just operated on a woman and that she had the biggest prostate ever, and the janitor tells him that only men have that. Silvera then talks about how he’s a detective, and that he is watching for changes, and more. Silvera is so natural here, with his bushy hair and mustache, he just exudes porn acting.

After the meeting in the random room, two nurses talk in the main lobby. They talk about how new uniforms were ordered, and they were on the way. Meanwhile, we end up going back to see the janitor cleaning, and inside a closet, when the head doctor comes in and puts on a lab coat. A woman comes into the doctor’s office, and says she has a headache that won’t go away. This is the 12 minute mark mind you, and the doctor looks at a file. The woman here is mature, made up like the late 1980s sitcom women would be, and has large red hair. The doctor makes some jokes, and tries to see what’s going on with the lady. She’s not having it, though, and she seems annoyed by the doctor’s lax methods. The doctor gets a phone call and says he has to go, but will be right back. The janitor comes out of the closet, and the woman grabs him, and pulls his pants down.

For this scene we see D.J. Cone, a redhead that looks a lot like your standard 1980s sitcom mom, and Steve Henessey, she blows Henessey a little, then seems frustrated when the doctor comes back yelling. The doctor comes in and recommends that we look into getting her temperature rectally, and we see him put a thermometer in her butt. The doctor gets a phone call again and says he will be right back. This time, D.J. Cone is nude, and as the janitor comes out of the closet again, he encounters Cone naked, and once again she pulls his pants down and wants to get action. The funky music starts and Cone gets really horny here, as Henessey just gets blown.

The scene cuts and we go to the lobby, and the doctor is yelling and muttering random bs, before we go back to the sex scene. I don’t know why there are edits of this type, but

Cone has full red pubic hair, and Henessey is big, as he goes in deep on the doctor’s table. The shadows here indicate studio lights from where the camera is facing, into the action. You can tell that this is not a real hospital, but a poorly dressed set. After some pumps, the janitor cums and Cone wipes herself up and then puts the thermometer back in her anus, and that’s it. The doctor returns and he starts to talk about what they can do to help her. She gets dressed, smiles, and we move along to the next scenario.

For the next scene we are back in the locker room. We see 4 nurses, all with big 1980s hair, and Joey Silvera sitting on a blue couch. The women are just talking randomly, and saying that they are not going to go anywhere until the inspectors have come through and gone through their work.

Moving forward, we see the blonde head nurse, and a young woman asking for a young man regarding seeing a young man, named Johnson. She claims that she’s his sister, and that she is a nurse. Harry Johnson, is of course the joke here, and the lady wants to do a good deed. She said she’d wait for up to 5 hours for Harry Johnson to get out of surgery.

The scene changes and we see three nurses laughing and giggling in a hallway. They said that they should give a bath to a random guy, and that he’s a fun dude to hang with. The women come through, and we get into a room where you know it’s a set. There’s a makeshift door, a blue wall with a 2 x 4 cross beam in the background. This is a set, you can tell by the way the shots are setup, and the women come in from an outer hallway. The shadows are cast as though there are studio lights overhead and off screen, while a hard camera and director situate themselves away from the action. Immediately, one of the women takes off her white panties, and we start to move forward to what will be the next sex scene. The women approach Peter North, as he is sleeping, and they all talk about what they should do first. One of them suggests that they use their tongue to wake him up. Bionca, Lynn Franciss, and Sheena Horne are the 3 women here, and they each have small breasts, thin frames, and large 1980s hairspray hair. They are straight out of the 1980s with their style, and all are wearing the white nurses uniforms that all nurses wore back in the proverbial day. There are two blondes and two brunettes getting in on the action, and immediately get Peter North hard. The women leave North asleep, and start to make out, and then do themselves while he is asleep. North has an odd penis here, where it flops up towards him, like he was using a penis pump, and it’s not all the way hard, until he starts to rub it and bring it up straight. There’s a terrible rock soundtrack, and the camera moves in front of him stroking, classic North style. The women get naked at this point. Through the shifting of the women’s positions, we get a threesome that is somewhat slow and steady, with North not wearing a condom, and the women taking turns riding him as he wakes up from his coma. The end comes with a Peter North cum blast on two women, and that’s about it. They dubbed the moaning! That’s when I notice they dubbed the freakin moaning! This scene was fast and simple.

Joey Silvera looks like Kurt Vonnegut by the way!

After the fourway sex scene we see Joey Silvera coming through and talking about how his head hurts. He talks about how he is having a hard time dealing with certain things. He then tells the head nurse that he’s on a mission and can’t seem to find the answers. Then goes to the Johnson sister and she talks to him a little.

We then move to the locker room, or break room, so to speak. It’s where the lockers are, and we see Keisha, a busty brunette with too much makeup, and Jose Duval. Duval is a thin, older looking dude, and he immediately jumps into the scene and takes over saying he is the man that wrestles himself, nude, and starts to take his clothing off in front of Keisha. Keisha is wearing a nurses uniform, is somewhat tall, has natural breasts, and without makeup, wouldn’t look so great. The dude is older, Duval is wearing a black thong, and he starts to wrestle himself. Duval is the luckiest man in porno, because this is too funny to me. He tries to wrestle himself, before Keisha starts to rub herself. This is a low point in the movie, as you see that he wrestles himself, and he says that sometimes he loses himself. Keisha asks him if he has ever wrestled a man, and Duval said that he has never wrestled them, but he would totally wrestle her. Keisha starts to suck the old man off, and he has a hard time taking the bra off of his woman, but she continues to suck Duval in a slow, methodical manner. The old man and the woman do it doggy style, and it’s a lackluster scene with a cum shot that is not that great. Duval does not have a big penis, or anything, and the cum blast is short, before the end shows Keisha sucking him off, and then tells hi m that he is very attractive, and then we move forward. That was beyond the lowest of the low in terms of sex. Duval is hairy, skinny, and while Keisha is good here, she’s not great, and just goes through the motions.

We move along and we see a woman praying with Peter North. There’s a prayer that occurs here, with Siobhan Hunter, a tall, red haired woman that claims she is a nun in an order of certain women. She prays a little with Peter North then begins to suck him off, fully clothed, mind you, until John Leslie walks in on them. The terrible music comes in, and Leslie starts to take off her shirt. We see more of Hunter’s body, and she has long red hair, small breasts, and light skin. The music throws me off, as I try to make sense of the room, which is terribly lit this time, with a two camera model that is just bad as the editing moves through several hard cuts. During this sequences, Leslie goes from behind while Peter North gets blown while John Leslie forces Hunter to bite a condom package open, then the camera slows down for her to start having sex with North, without the condom, mind you. We then see the action, and it’s Leslie with a condom going in anal, while North goes in the other side. You get double penetration here, and the condom is so yellow, and so dark, while the sex continues, and the two men have their way with this woman. The finish shows Leslie taking off his condom, then cumming on her backside while holding the condom in the other hand, while the soft keyboard music plays, and then Leslie walks away. While Leslie goes to another bed, North is finished off, but we don’t see a a cum shot, just a hard cut as he says that the nurses are too much.

There’s a hard cut, and we see the head nurse talking to Joey Silvera as he comes through and says that she has stolen all of their uniforms. So we see the head nurse yelling at Silvera, and saying that the nun stole clothing and what not. We then see Silvera in a bath robe run away, and then ask for Linda to come through and help him. out. The movie shows Silvera talking to a nurse and just talking about adoration, and how he wants her to work with him.

We get a long shot, then into the sex, as Joey Silvera and Bionca have sex on the floor of the hospital. Continuity wise this makes little sense, and why would they have sex on the hard floor in a hospital? For goodness sakes, this has only a couple of positions, and back and forth, with Silvera trying to hang on for a short romp. Silvera is rock hard, and goes into Bionca straight way, with her legs up, and him pushing in with bad kissing. Silvera tries to kiss Bionca at the one hour mark, and it shows that she isn’t into kissing, and it throws me off a little. There is a cum shot, and a random teddy bear, yes a teddy bear in a mop bucket watching them.

After that, we end up going forward to the waiting room, where the nurses are talking to the nun. She said that she is not the inspector, and is just a nun and is waiting for her brother. She says that the women are prostitutes, and that they are nothing short of being sluts. That’s it. We then see Silvera and Bionca cuddling and that’s about it.

The last scene shows the janitor and Lois Ayres. Ayres comes into his work area and just says that he needs to be quiet and do her now. Lois Ayres is the head nurse, she’s very blonde. Ayres and Steve Henessey starts to kiss, and we get a terrible view from above. They are supposed to be in a janitor’s closet, but the makeshift walls are obviously fake, and the scene moves fast into a blow job. Lois Ayres bleach blonde hair and white pale skin allows for contrast with Steve’s dark skin. She blows him and the music intensifies, before they start to get into the sex, which isn’t too good, but hey there’s no condom here. The sex is a quicky at best, and it is heavily edited, so you only get a few pumps before Henessey cums and that’s it. It’s at this point that I think Lois Ayres is wearing a wig. The two have sex, it’s quick, and he cums and it’s not romantic at all, but then again, it doesn’t need to be. The camera barely hits penetration, and the dubbing is just so bad here, that I don’t want to see it. It slows down at the cum shot, but you don’t see it, it just slows down, and we get a hard cut.

The camera zooms in and the music starts to get louder, and we get a hard cut back to the lobby and we realize that it’s Henry Johnson not Harry Johnson, but it doesn’t matter. Silvera comes back and says he found the uniforms and then we see everyone laughing. She comes through and says that the inspection is being done by Edwin Justice, and then Duval comes through and said he’s the man that wrestles himself, and that’s it. He gets carted away, the women and the guys look at one another, and says that they all passed the inspection.

I give “Night Shift Nurses” a 2 out of 5.


This is perhaps the worse nurse themed porno movie that I’ve ever seen, and at the same time, I’m attracted to nurse movies, because I love the uniforms. It’s not a terrible movie, but it’s far from good, a 2 out of 5, as it had a good plot, but other than that, I’ll pass on a repeat viewing. But hey, why not check out "Night Shift Nurses" anyway?

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