Planet of The Babes (2001) Review

Planet of The Babes DVD Poster and VHS Box

When I was a teenager, I found out about the Spice Channel. It was a cable network that showed pornography but with a twist. The twist was simple, they didn’t show you hardcore elements. What I mean by that was that they were full run porno films, but they didn’t show the penetration, nor the acts that you would expect from a porn. Now, don’t get me wrong, they were still the movies that you would see if you were to rent them, but with strategically placed objects in front of the penises, and more. Imagine the scene from “Austin Powers” where there’s always something to cover the genitals and breasts. Well this was kind of like that, only you could see a lot more. For instance, you would see the eyes of a woman giving a blow job, or you would see the man’s face buried in her vagina, but you could not see his tongue, and you could not see his penis or her mouth. It was an odd way of doing things, but I didn’t realize that it was the way things were back then. Today, from what I’ve read online, you don’t have to worry about that, because they show all sorts of things on cable.

I begin with that introduction because that’s where I first heard about “Planet of The Babes”. I saw a trailer for the movie on the Spice Channel, as I ordered it illegally, and would later just pretend I didn’t, and had to eventually watch this movie. Well, I didn’t watch it until recently, because I have been tracking down all of the adult movies that I recall and am reviewing them as part of this blog. “Planet of The Babes” is a movie that sticks to the ideas that were presented in the original “Planet of the Apes” not the 2001 version that was coming out. This one tried to tie in the original concepts into a pornographic feature, while still maintaining some of the original story. With that in mind, you’re going to start this movie with a lot of dialogue, and guys walking around with space suits, and no helmets around what they assume is Earth. That’s right, this hardcore feature doesn’t even start very hardcore, but if you like plot with your hardcore, then by all means, this is a welcome solution.

The plot features the astronauts finding a watering hole, and then going for a swim. When their clothing gets stolen, they stumble across some people that are just eating fruit and sitting around naked. One of them finds a very attractive woman and decides it’s time to get it on, and so he does, wildly gets it on, and the movie continues from there. The astronauts get caught, some die, and others stay alive, but just like the main movie from the past, one stays alive to escape, down the line.

Jim Powers directs this movie, and it’s budget is somewhat low, but the costumes and the ideas are similar to that of the original “Planet of the Apes”, which is appreciated here. If you’re serious about your porno parodies being as close to the source material as possible, then “Planet of The Babes” is going to be the one you love, because it does a fine job of skewering the original at times, but maintaining that hardcore sex line as well.

The movie stars Asia Carrera, Steve St. Croix, Bridgette Kerkove, Gwen Summers, Flick Shagwell, Lola, Melissa West, Mickey G, Nick East, and Dave Hardman. These names are not made up, mind you. This movie was originally shot in 2000, and the DVD came out in 2001. It’s Jim Powers production via Sterling Pictures, and it was the first of a trilogy, which you may or may not know about. This movie was followed by “Playmate of the Apes”, and “Planet of the Erotic Ape”, all of which were tributes to the original, although this is the one that seems to fit the traditional story a bit more. The sets and design were well done here, but the apes were all wearing rubber masks, so that’s a little funny. Either way, there’s a lot of detail that went into the movie, aside from the obvious sleaze factor that comes with pornography.

Overall, the sex is fine, there’s a mix of outdoor and indoor caged sex, but nothing that really got me too excited. Asia Carrera does fuck Steven St. Croix, and their chemistry is usually good. However, since this was a bare floor sex romp, you can tell that the two couldn’t move nearly as much, and so Asia did a lot of the work, balancing herself and trying not to fall over and cause disruption. Maybe there’s bloopers in subsequent releases, but in the one I saw, there were no extras. Bridgette Kerkove is definitely hot, and her blow job in the beginning of the film was quite good, but again, outdoor sex, and the lack of springs or cushions really made the whole thing a bit unsexy. Sure, it’s sex, sure she’s beautiful, but the logistics are a bit poor here.

There are two schools of thought that come to mind with this film. There’s the Asia Carrera collectors that will want to purchase “Planet of The Babes” for her scenes, both straight and lesbian romps. Then there are those that want to just get off to some porn from the 2000 era. I don’t know which I would fall into now, but when I first heard about it and saw that Asia was in it, I was all about it. Going back to see this, now, I can truly say that I’m not a big fan of this movie. Sure, Asia Carrera is beautiful in her youth, and Jim Powers does a fine job pulling together a decent tribute to the original source materials, but if you are looking to get off, this may not do it. Sure, it’s functional for what it is, but a classic? No way, not even close. I watched it a couple of times, and honestly, aside from Asia Carrera and Steven St. Croix’s work here, I didn’t really find this too appealing. It does the job of being an adult movie, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not what I expected, and really put a damper on the fantasy that I had from first hearing about this movie. Sadly, “Planet of The Babes” is not the finest of movies, but hey, Asia Carrera in her prime! That’s got to count for something, right? I guess.

I give “Planet of The Babes” a 2 out of 5 stars.

You can buy “Planet of The Babes” via a adult dvd empire, or find it online somewhere, maybe even amazon from time to time.

Did you see “Planet of The Babes”? Do you like it? Drop me a comment and let me know.