Jenna’s Revenge (1997) Review

Jenna's Revenge (1997) DVD Cover and Poster

I haven’t reviewed a lot of movies that featured Jenna Jameson. I’m not sure why, but it just hasn’t happened. Yes, I have a few, but not nearly as many as you’d expect. It’s for that reason why today, I’m going to be reviewing a movie from 1997. Now, I did see this movie on cable, when I was a teenager, watching the Spice Network, when I shouldn’t have. This movie is none other than, “Jenna’s Revenge”, and it stars a lot of heavy hitters. The stars of this movie include, Brad Armstrong, Eric Price, Holly Body, Jake Steed, Jenna Jameson, Jill Kelly, Johnny Black, Mark Davis, Marc Wallice, Papillon, Ruby, Sindee Coxx, Tony Tedeschi, and Vince Vouyer. These are all stars that I have seen in the past, and some are more famous than others. Whatever the case may be, the movie is one of the classics of 1990s porno, but is it worthwhile today? Let’s review it and find out.

The movie begins with a bar scene. We are taken into a bar where Jenna Jameson shows up and starts being catty with the bartender. She goes in and asks for a drink, and she is snotty. This is prime Jenna Jameson, with long blonde hair, breast implants, and make up done right. The bartender delays in pouring drinks, and eventually gets one to our main star. In the bar, a random dude asks what she’s looking for and Jameson replies, that she’s looking for a man. There’s a man in the bar that says he’s the one she’s looking for and they go outside to talk. Jenna gets a little roughed up and she says that she needs help with her husband. She needs someone to take care of him. From there we are taken to our first sex scene.

The screen fades and you are taken to a bathroom in which Jenna Jameson is in lingerie on her knees, and she’s blowing Tony Tedeschi. There is an incredible amount of chemistry in this scene, especially from Tony, as he’s rock hard in this one, no joke, and Jenna is working him over in a way that few scenes seem to focus on. There’s an orchestral movie theme playing as the two get things moving forward, and it’s truly a sight to see. Jenna here is in her prime element, and the lighting, set design and overall cinematography lends itself well to this release. Tony Tedeschi looks like he’s going to blow his load several times, and I’m not sure how he keeps it together during some of the initial blow job sequences. Jenna just goes to work, with long passionate strokes, and deep throating at times, making this one of the better sex openers I’ve reviewed in a long time. There is no sex here, it’s just a blow job and a facial, and that’s it. Tedeschi cums on Jenna’s face and she continues to blow him after, making a mess and then sucking on afterwards, creating one hell of a sequence, and truly opening up this movie in quite a striking fashion. The scene is shot in a bathroom inside a mansion, and it’s not half bad.

The scene ends, and Jenna tries to act, and it’s not great. But she wants to get away from her husband, and wants him dead. The dude says he’s not interested. The character’s name is Ray, and he gets into a hummer, before he finally decides to say yes to helping out the poor woman. He agrees to help, and then we are shifted to another scene. This other scene features Tony Tedeschi in an office, and he is talking and then leaves. But leaves behind a random office dude, and Jill Kelly. The two are the next two to get it on.

Eric Price and Jill Kelly start out with a blow job sequence. If you’re reading this blog regularly, then you already know that I’m a big fan of Jill Kelly, and would love to meet and interview her one day. Not sure if that will ever happen. In this scene, she puts on a showcase, outdoing the chemistry that Jenna had in the first scene, and going deeper than her in the blow job. She deep throats, she sucks, she strokes, and the music makes this scene seem a lot more creative overall. Jill Kelly sports the classic swimsuit tan line, and has high heels on as Price gets to initiate oral after some time. The sex is adequate, but not that grand, with Price cumming fast, and getting some anal in for good measure. He cums so fast the scene barely gets you aroused, and then finishes on her stomach. Kelly couldn’t have been satisfied here, and the scene cuts to black before sending you back to the mansion for another part of the story.

Tony Tedeschi is seen coming home, and he’s in his full business attire. He walks into a bedroom inside his mansion and there he finds Jenna Jameson. She asks how his day was, and then she gets mad at him, and yells at him to pay attention. He then threatens to call her psychiatrist, and that ends in her yelling. Jenna goes to the phone and calls Ray. He asks for 100,000 dollars and a picture of her husband, and he’s going to take care of him. Jenna then quickly hangs up the phone, and the deal isn’t necessarily done. Tony walks into the kitchen and Jenna is in there, he asks if she’s going to go to bed soon, only to have Jenna yell again. She’s desperately wanting out of this marriage that they are in. It’s here that Jenna takes her long hair and starts cutting it, leaving strands all over the floor and crying as the orchestra plays on. Later, she goes to the designated drop off spot, and delivers the 100K in money, and our antihero Ray goes to pick it up. This was shot in Los Angeles, and it’s painfully obvious that it was. Oh the good times, I used to live there. At this point, the movie has more plot than sex, so if you were waiting for lots of sex, you’re not going to get it here, it’s just not going to happen. There’s a lot of plot and dialogue. The movie continues and we are taken back to the mansion, after a brief interaction between Ray and Jenna, where Jenna comes home to Tony, and gets a surprise. Tony says he has a surprise for her, and well, it is a gift. Tony hands Jenna a blindfold. He then leads her to the pool area of their home.

It’s at the pool where Tony starts to give Jenna oral, and then out comes Sindee Coxx. Sindee begins to take over with the oral, while the music turns into another orchestral sounding rock tune. This is very much the same kind of music you’d hear from a Cannon Films release. It’s actually kind of good, and the soundtrack should be available for download. The scene is outdoors, and then slips into the pool a bit. Coxx has long blonde hair, and is skinny, Tony gets in on the action as well, but this is mostly just oral for the starting line of the scene. Eventually the blind fold comes off, and Jenna and Coxx give into Tony. But it’s mostly just Coxx. Jenna disappears after a few moments, and leaves Tony and Coxx to do their thing. Jenna gets mad when Tony is having sex with Sindee, and runs off. After a few more strokes Tony cums on Sindee and that’s the end of this scene.

The scene shifts, and it’s Jenna driving to the bar where Ray’s at. I believe Ray is played by Brad Armstrong at this point. The color from the film turns off, and it’s black and white. This features Jenna on the bar top dancing for Brad. She goes topless and in comes the classic guitar rock, and this is quite the scene. It gets quite sexy, and right when she puts her legs around Brad’s head, reality calls and color comes back into the scene, changing the scenario back to reality. The two start to argue. Then kiss, and they start to go forward with gusto towards sex.

Jenna Jameson and Brad Armstrong start to have sex in an alley way. Jameson immediately pulls out Armstrong’s member and starts to blow him. He gets hard instantly, and she really works him over, much more passionately than she did in the opening sequence. This is not a long scene, with Armstrong putting it into Jameson while she rests on a Hummer. He goes forward through a couple of positions, always standing, and eventually cums on Jameson. There’s a melodic guitar rock tune here, and it’s straightforward, no nonsense sex. There are a few moments where it seems like this is going to turn into anal, but it doesn’t, Jameson just keeps things in one area, and there are no condoms here. Eventually Armstrong can’t keep it together and cums on her face, and that’s the end of the scene. Jameson and Armstrong have unique chemistry in this sequence, and it’s quite hot as you see her green eyes throughout the sex. Not a bad sequence, but it’s outdoors and has bad music.

Jenna Jameson comes home to her mansion and Tony is playing pool. The two argue and he slaps the crap out of her. She then runs to Ray, and says that he needs to take Tony out. The sequence then shifts to Ray driving, and a part commencing in two places. However, the scenes shift to the bar again. Inside the bar there is a three way sex scene about to happen.

Holly Boddy, Jake Steed, and Mark Wallice start to kiss and start working through some vibrations. This is a fast moving scene, with Boddy getting naked first, then blowing the two guys, on a pool table. The music is a trip hop track that isn’t all that good. The two guys seem to work well here, and while it seems like one isn’t as hard at first, he eventually gets there, and Boddy does a lot of the work while wearing heels. After several positions, the movie moves into a double penetration. The double penetration gets the guys moaning more than Boddy, but it’s a unique sequence with a trippy soundtrack. Eventually one of the guys finishes on her lower back, and then the other just isn’t on screen that much. It’s an ok sequence, with a predictable finish. This felt like filler if you ask me. Holly Boddy is a tanned woman with black hair and large breasts.

After the sex, Ray comes in and talks to the owner of the bar and gives him the lowdown on what is going to occur. That shifts to another scene, and we are at the mansion again, there’s a party going on, and it has a lot of women and men there, all dressed up. It’s a swingers party from what I can tell, and it’s interesting to see who is there, as it will no doubt lead to an orgy scene, right? You know it.

Jenna Jameson, Johnni Black, Papillon, Ruby, Mark Davis, and Vince Vouyer all start to have sex, and it goes from party to sex right away. There’s no condoms in sight, and all of the women are beautiful, and moaning at different points. The camera moves around to different people, different movements, and it’s interesting to see. It’s an orgy, and it looks like a lot of fun, if you ask me. The lighting is nice, the mansion setting is good, and the focus is all on the women, with lots of pretty tanned ladies with fake breasts, and shaved pubic hair. There’s not much that can be said about this one, there’s a lot of sex, and multiple cum shots and that’s the end.

The scene ends, and in comes Ray with a gun. Jenna asks where he was, and asks him to kill Tony. There’s a stand off! Jenna pulls out a gun and says she’s sick of Ray, and then there’s a Mexican standoff. The lights go out and someone yells, “NO”, then fades to black. We are taken to another scene. It’s Jenna digging a hole, it’s in black and white and we don’t see anything but Jenna, a body bag and a hole. The narrator eludes to the fact that she killed both of them, and that’s that. Fade to black, roll credits, Jenna wins.

I give “Jenna’s Revenge” a 4 out of 5.

I have to give credit where it is due, “Jenna’s Revenge” has everything you want in a porno. It has a lengthy story, with some sex thrown in for good measure. The start is in the movie a lot, she has sex a great deal, and gets revenge on the people she needs to get revenge on. It’s a good movie that is worth picking up if you’re a fan of Jenna Jameson, and the rest of the cast. It’s plot heavy, not sex heavy, although it doesn’t shy from hardcore, including double penetration. A good overall showing if you ask me. Not perfect, but really good overall.

You can purchase “Jenna’s Revenge” on streaming or on DVD by clicking here. If you’re a collector, you’ll definitely want to add this one to your Jenna Jameson and Jill Kelly collection, for that matter.

The Perfect Slut (2005) Review

The Perfect Slut (2005) DVD Cover 

Heading into 2005, going a bit more modern than usual on this website, we are going to discuss “The Perfect Slut”. I didn’t know anything about this movie, and so I was surprised that within 1 minute and 30 seconds Cindy Crawford was talking to the camera and playing with herself. Before getting too far into this one, the stars of this movie include Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Sergio, Tyler Faith, Ashton Moore, Gia Paloma, and others. This is a gonzo movie. I didn’t realize that until I started watching it, and then I looked closer at the box art. This is a Jill Kelly production, but she’s not in it. If you’ve ready anything on this blog, you know that I’m a big fan of Jill Kelly, and would love to meet and interview her. As for this particular movie, it’s her production company, but she’s not doing anything in it. This is a gonzo porno movie, and I don’t like reviewing gonzo movies, but hey, it’s too late now, I have to get started.

The opening scene features Cindy Crawford in what appears to be a bad motel, or a set somewhere in the San Fernando Valley. She starts playing with herself and then in comes Alex Rox, Sergio, and Tyce Bune. This is a fourway sexual romp, and two of the guys aren’t even hard. They struggle to get it up, while two guys are hard. Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Sergio, and Tyce Bune go through some good points overall. Cindy Crawford looks nothing like the super model. She’s a blonde haired, tanned, skinny porno actress, and well, she’s not half bad. If you like blonde haired women, this is going to be your scene, at least in the beginning, as she’s shaved, and she is perfectly tanned, and looks like that California blonde style. Crawford gets wet with some oral, she has a piercing down below, and a landing strip. The guys take turns with her, and she seems to genuinely get into some of the action, moaning, and nearly screaming at one point. There are multiple positions, multiple partner changes, and your classic 4 way sex romp. At one point she asks for anal, and that’s showcased at around 14 minutes into the movie. A few minutes later, there’s a double penetration, and that’s about the best part of the scene. The camera moves back and forth and shows you that this is a set, not a hotel, which is interesting to see. Overall, Crawford’s enthusiasm for this scene makes it worth checking out, as she really gets into the sex, and the guys are there to oblige her requests. The show ends with multiple money shots on her face, and that’s it.

From that scene we are taken to the back of a club. It’s there that two blondes are kissing. A techno beat starts and the two start to get a bit more extreme. The two women, are Ashton Moore and Tyler Faith. As far as lesbian scenes are concerned, this is not half bad. They are both thin, tall California blondes. They go slowly, and they are sensual throughout their scene. It’s an interesting scene and one that is definitely going to attract those that like blondes. Both women are shaved, both are toned, tanned, and seem to like what is going on. The lighting is dark, the music is bothersome, but the sex is above average. What else can you ask for?

The sequence ends, and we are taken to another scenario. This one features Kurt Lockwood, a toned guy with an average penis, Cindy Crawford, and Summer Sweet. Again, we are treated to blondes. It’s two blondes working over Lockwood, and a jazzy, new school beat. Kurt looks like a surfer dude, and he looks about as smart as a box of cement. No offense, but it’s just a funny looking guy, with an average sized member. The music doesn’t fit the scene, and the set looks like the lobby of an old hotel. The women immediately start working over Lockwood, giving wet blow jobs, and kisses. No condoms are in place, and the two women start things off with reverse cowgirl, taking turns. The new wave jazz was annoying here, but the sex is fine. Two blonde haired women that you’d find on the streets of Santa Monica, near the pier. If you’re into tanned, skinny, blonde haired women, then this scene will really do it for you. As for me, it’s average. The women are shaved, they seem semi-into it, and Lockwood does good not to cum too early and he really pushes into both women. Lockwood just looks like he’s going through the motions, and the women aren’t that into him, but they are doing the job. Sure it’s sexual, but it’s far from being passionate. However, as far as eye candy is concerned, the women are hot, and the more you watch, the more they tempt you. The scene ends with a money shot, and it’s not that great. Lockwood is delayed in finishing himself off, but the women make due and suck it dry, making it the best part of the scene. Other than that, this isn’t that great.

The scene shifts, as is the standard for gonzo porno movies, and it’s Alexis Amore, Charmane Star, and Alex Sanders hanging out at a strip club. This appears to be the champagne room, and while Chris Rock said that there’s no sex in the champagne room, this trio is ignoring it. The two women have long brunette hair, and medium tanned skin. Sanders has a skinny, rocker type body, and a condom is used in this scene. The two women pounce on him, blowing him, then getting on top for a ride. Sanders takes turn with both women, one had a piercing of a diamond on her lower parts, and then after some back and forth, Sanders gives the women a money shot, although he struggles to let it out and it doesn’t seem to come through with much vigor. The women blow him after the fact, and that’s the end. I like the finish, anytime an actor cums and then gets a blow job, lucky bastard.

And now, another sex scene. This time around there’s an alternative rock tune playing in the background. This set looks a lot like a college dorm room, and it’s a boy girl scene. This scene features Gia Paloma and Christian XXX. Gia moans through the kissing portions of this, and Christian gets hard fast, so Gia jumps on for a blow job. There’s some blocking that goes on here, the same that you’d expect from old Cable television porno, and it’s funny to see. Gia goes deep here, and actually seems to have some passion for what she’s doing. That makes this scene a lot better than the previous one. The two start having sex, and that passion seems to dwindle a little. Gia does moan while in different positions, and eventually in anal, but Christian seems to be in work mode and losing his erection at one point. It also looks to be painful at one point, and the signs of a penis that has been pumped comes through. Christian eventually cums on Gia’s back and butt and the scene ends.

The final scene, we are taken to a set with good lighting and Cindy Crawford talking. She starts off by stripping, and then a group of five guys show up. She is enthusiastic about what is to come, and well, here we go, the final scene begins at around one hour and 10 minutes. This scene features Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Anthony Hardwood, guy, Sergio, and Tyce Bune. Crawford immediately starts to suck everyone off, and no dick is giant, or monster in size. The guys that aren’t getting blown are just masturbating, trying to get hard, and one guy cums too early. The sex begins, and it’s standard five way sex, with one guy getting into it, while the others watch, then a DP sequence occurs after some anal, and things really get going. There are no condoms used here. A few of the guys don’t even stay hard for most of the scene. The camera work is not that good here, and the guys go through the motions, including several DP moments, but honestly, it’s not that great. Crawford seems to enjoy it, but at a certain point seems to get bored with the action. She moans, the guys go through th emotions, and she asks them to go slow, but they don’t, and she just takes it. The scene eventually finishes with the guys cumming on Cindy one by one and that’s it. The movie ends and that’s the end of the production.

I give “The Perfect Slut” a 3 out of 5.

Cindy Crawford is a name that I recognize from super models. However, this is not her. This blonde haired woman has a California look to her, and in my younger years would’ve turned me on. Now in my 30s, however, she’s not that great, and the movie seems forced at times. The rest of the scenes are a bit dry, although there are a few moments of enthusiasm. Gonzo porno sucks, and I never liked it. However, there’s enough here for a 3 out of 5, so I handed it down.

New Wave Hookers 2 (1991) Review

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Mile High Girls (1986) Review

Mile High Girls (1986) Poster and DVD Cover

Today on John G’s Dirty Movie Review we are going back to 1986 in order to review a movie with a lot of stars in it. The movie is called “Mile High Girls”. It’s a movie that caught my attention because I like the idea of the mile high club. I reviewed a movie about stewardesses and other things, and that was fine, but would this live up? I didn’t know at first, but hey, it’s my duty to watch and review these movies. “Mile High Girls” from 1986 stars Erica Boyer, Jon Martin, Porsche Lynn, John Leslie, Jim White, Viper, Tom Byron, and Joey Silvera. These are all major players in the 1980s porn world, and well, let’s see how they did it, no pun intended.

Now, I don’t know how porn sets are constructed to have such a cool look and feel. This movie starts with a real looking airplane interior. Now just any one, either, one from the 1980s. I flew in the 1980s, and 1990s, and can tell you that the interiors were way different. This was very much different, and it’s interesting to see it. Joey Silvera is seated in in an aisle seat and is brushing his teeth. He orders a drink and a stewardess drops a drink on him. He’s the best part of this movie, his acting is second to none, and it’s funny to see him interact with the women.

We move from the aisles to the cockpit. It’s here that a stewardess drops a cup of coffee on the pilot of the airplane! She freaks out and says that she can make it up to the pilot. That’s when she starts to open up the pilot’s shirt, and that’s when the two kiss, and you know what’s going to happen next. The plane goes into autopilot, and a smooth jazz sound comes in.

Erica Boyer and Jon Martin have sex in the cockpit of a commercial airliner, with a soothing jazz tune on the background. It’s interesting to see Erica, because I just saw her in a penis pumping instructional video, which was gross, and interesting all at the same time. For a 1980s porno, there’s certainly a lot of kissing. Erica Boyer is a blonde haired, medium breasted woman, and Jon Martin is your average stud. Not huge, just regular in size, if you ask me. I didn’t mention this before, but there’s film grain, and this movie was definitely meant for the silver screen, and it shows. Boyer goes to town on Martin’s penis, and he’s not shaved, giving every-man a sense that they could get in on the porno craze too. This is a sensual scene for the most part, and it’s interesting to watch Boyer work. She really seems to be into what she’s doing, while Jon Martin looks like he’s fighting not to cum as Boyer sucks and moves. She’s really sucking here, not just gliding, and this could very well be the best blow job start I’ve reviewed in on this blog thus far. After a quick blow, Boyer lays down a little and gets oral, she’s not shaved, and Martin gives it a little try, but moves to sex quickly. He bends Boyer over and the two start to work through doggy style. The directory gets you in close a bit, but it’s not nearly as much as you’d expect from modern porn. Meanwhile the co-pilot and the other stewardess is listening in in a hallway. There’s a bit of sex and it’s not bad, Boyer moans and Martin just goes through the motions. Eventually Martin finishes on Boyer’s lower back and butt, and that’s the end. He says, “Welcome to the Mile High Club”, and that’s the end of the first sex scene.

The movie continues and you see the plane arrive at an airport for a layover. Everyone empties out the plane, and that’s it for a moment. There’s some talk between the stewardesses. When everyone leaves except for the co-pilot and one of the stewardesses, the two engage in an bout of eroticism.

Porsche Lynn and Jon Leslie start making out, and they are fast moving straight into sex. This is a bit more fast paced than the first scene, and there’s a hard bop soundtrack to this. Meanwhile the camera follows Erica Boyer in the airport, which looks to be in Japan, and she’s just walking around. The director cuts back to the sex, and Jon Leslie asks for a blow job. At one point he commands, “don’t lick it, suck it”, which the director left in the movie, for another blooper. Leslie is not a big guy, mind you, and it shows. He does hold on before cumming, but it sure looks like he’s trying hard not to blow things as Lynn really works over his erection. Leslie has a lot of body hair, Lynn is a blonde haired, good looking woman, and reminds me of Ginger Lynn, of course. The two eventually get to the sex, and the director doesn’t show you a lot of penetration, just a little bit, before Leslie finally can’t hold on and cums in the face of Lynn. The best part of this scene is watching Porsche Lynn’s hair go from high and tight to loose and all over the place during the course of the sex. Other than that, this wasn’t that great, unless you like blow job finishes, in which case you’ll like how Leslie holds on just long enough to drop a load on Lynn’s face, which she seems to enjoy.

In between the sex scenes we get more dialogue from different people. We also see Erica Boyer taking photographs, and just exploring different areas. IT’s not bad, but it’s also not great either. It’s honestly just B-roll to fill the movie. Remember, this was meant to be in movie theaters, so you aren’t going to just get pure sex, you’re going to get a mix of things, and this definitely fills that void. So when you are going to see a movie in the theater, there’s sex, but there’s also b-roll and other elements to help break up the brown paper bags being used for personal reasons. In this case, Boyer seems to have almost her flight and runs into an old flame while catching a taxi.

A jazzy bass line begins in the backseat of a Taxi cab in what appears to be Hong Kong. Erica Boyer and Jim White starts to kiss, and well, that prompts the clothing to start coming off. Erica Boyer starts off with a blow job to Jim White. All while in the backseat of a taxi that’s headed to the airport in what I can only assume is Hong Kong. The driver doesn’t seem to care, as the two just go for it in the back seat. For what it’s worth, Jim White has a bigger penis than most of the other guys in this movie, and Boyer really seems to get into this scene more than the others. She eventually moves over and sits on White’s face as she blows him. This is one of the biggest taxi cab back seats ever! Eventually Boyer moves over to reverse cowgirl and the two have sex while the taxi is supposedly moving. This has to be a set. Either way, the two have some chemistry here, and it really does look good overall. Mind you, this is only 33 minutes into the film, and the two are really going to town. They seem to have a great deal of chemistry, and when White’s finished, he cums on Boyer’s pubic mound.

After this sequence, we end up back in the airplane, and two flight attendants are talking about how they are going to be flying to Macau. Then you get some more b-footage of the city and different areas. It’s interesting to see the signs from Macau, and well, one day I want to visit.

Up next the movie shifts to a club scene. It’s a live sex show in Macau. This features a lot of dancing at first, then comes through with an interesting focus.

The sex show features Buddy Love, Jason Jules, and Viper. I’ve wanted to review Viper’s movies because she’s a very tall woman with a very specific body tattoo that wasn’t seen in the 1980s porno world a lot. When I say she’s tall, I mean it, and this tattoo of a large snake is definitely something you have to see to believe. She works very well here, giving an incredible blow job, and then accepting hard cock. The sequence was said to have two guys and viper, but it starts with just one guy and one girl, then switches to another area of the movie.

The director floats to another scene, and this time it’s Porsche Lynn with big hair and a red dress. She gets on her knees and starts to work on Tom Byron. That’s right, another Tom Byron scene. Tom Byron and Porsche Lynn begin to eagerly undress and have sex in what appears to be a cheap motel. Lynn’s hair is out of control here, and Tom Byron has his signature moustache. He looks so young here, and it’s interesting see how his career kept going forward. Lucky man indeed. I’d love to interview the guy. Byron here has a bit of a sensual run with Lynn, and she gets very excited to work with him. Byron gets into the action while on top, and the two remain kissing through much of the strokes, which is kind of neat. The two are not shaved, so you get full close up of the action, and it’s quite nice to see. Tom Byron is an allstar in this scene, but it abruptly changes.

The director decides to go back to the live sex show. That’s where the third man comes in, and it’s a guy that was in the audience. He has leather pants on, and immediately takes them off and gives Viper something to suck on. The sex show turns into a threeway, and the dudes all work together to give Viper a good time. There are multiple positions here, and lots of back and forth, with a money shot on Viper’s snake tattoo, and then right in her face, before the director cuts to the Tom Byron scene.

Tom Byron at this point is in doggy style with Porsche Lynn. He really gets to work here and it’s interesting to hear her moan while Byron goes to town. Lynn really gets excited here, and is wet, while Byron’s youth takes over, and showcases why he’s one of the premier porn stars from the 1980s. This is a sweaty, casual sex scene that enhances the pleasure of both the viewer and the two getting it on. The cheap motel vibe aside, the music is good, Lynn’s red lingerie is nice to see, and the two seem to actually be enjoying the process of making this, with a lot of positions, and moaning. Eventually this one ends with Lynn blowing Tom Byron getting a blow job then a hand job, but no money shot. Not sure why they decided on that.

The movie goes forward to the airplane. The flight attendants talk while Joey Silvera keeps bugging them.

The camera then shows you some more B-footage. Eventually showing you a scene where Erica Boyer and Porsche Lynn seem to be in an apartment together. This is a classic 1980s set, with too many plants for some reason, and tacky interior design. The two women go into a shower and start to make out, and play with one another in a somewhat awkward and somewhat forced lesbian scene. Sure it works, but it’s lackluster compared to the rest of the movie. It is almost like a softcore porno movie, if you ask me, with a few notes of hardcore here and there. Nothing great, nothing terrible, just two blondes taking a shower and enjoying the process.

Joey Silvera goes into the apartment or room, and notices that his room has some women in it. The women stumble upon him and they decide to help him out a little. This turns into a three some. Joey Silvera, Erica Boyer and Porsche Lynn have a threesome in what appears to be a terrible apartment, or wait, a hotel room. This is not a terrible scene, it’s not a great one either. SIlvera has been in other movies that he shines in, but here he kind of just goes through the motions. The women seem to be fine with him, and they do perform ok, but it’s obvious that there’s that “it” factor missing in this sequence. Silvera gets enough action with both women, but it’s short lived as the movie ends with Silvera cumming on the two, and then just finishing up. That’s the movie, and it’s not a long one. This movie is only one hour and sixteen minutes long, mind you, so this scene kind of just ends with the flight attendants talking about how great it is to be working for an airline.

I give “Mile High Girls” a 3 out of 5.

I didn’t really like the short scenes, and the chemistry lacked throughout. The Tom Byron scene, and the opening sequences was fun. If you are a fan of Viper, and any of the other actors in this movie, then why not pick it up? It’s more than adequate, but it’s not something that you may want to see over and over again. I did like a few things, and I noted them. It’s a good movie, just not a great one.

You can purchase and stream “Mile High Girls” by clicking here. Check out Viper’s scene, and Tom Byron’s scene if you only purchase scenes from the link.

Betrayed (1996) Review

Betrayed (1996) DVD Cover 

I’ve talked about the Spice Network before. If you don’t remember the Spice Network for cable television or later the Hot Network, you don’t really know how terrible cable pornography was. You see, back then, whenever you would order a 4 hour to 8 hour block of Spice Network, they would play several movies within a block of time. You could get 2 or 3 movies, sometimes 4, and it was all random and for only about 5 bucks or 8 bucks depending on your provider. I bring that up again because I first was exposed to Jenna Jameson through The Spice Network. Not only that, when you see the footage from those times, there is no penetration, and no erect penises. They are always blocked off, and you only see the bumping and grinding. Well, it’s 2018 and I have an official XXX release of “Betrayed” which stars Jenna Jameson, from 1996, and I can finally see it without the censorship that cable television in the 1990s had. So this is an exciting start to today’s review which features high production value, stars Randy West, Ruby, Sindee Cox, Vince Vouyer, Steve Drake, and Jenna Jameson.

The first thing that you’re going to notice about this movie is that it has some great overall music. The musical score is tremendous, and I was absolutely floored by the tension that was created throughout the opening. The start of the movie features a roaming camera inside a bar, with stellar editing from Greg Steel. The art director is Rod Hopkins, and the director of the movie is none other than, Greg Steel. This is a higher budget porno and it shows at times.

The movie starts with Vince Vouyer and some random dude talking. They are in an alley and one has a Frys Electronics shirt on, which is funny to me. From this point we cut to the inside of a warehouse, and there are two people having sex.

Juliette Carelton and James Bonn are in the process of foreplay, with a techno beat that starts. Juliette Carelton is a new woman to me, a tanned medium breasted young looking woman, and Bonn is a standard stud. Carelton has a smooth body, and gets really wet for what Bonn gives her first of all. The warehouse scenery isn’t half bad, but I can’t get over the techno soundtrack. It’s a nice mix of loops, as you see Carelton give an impassioned blow job to a smaller sized Bonn. The sex begins, and thet wo go at it with Carelton moaning quite a bit. She’s not shaved, so if you like all natural, you’ll like her. No condoms here, just several positions and the two going through the motions of traditional sex. The techno beat is impressive, and the two moan together as they share some chemistry at around the 7 minute mark. Within a few moments from doggy style, James Bonn loses his erection and then tries to regain it for a cum shot, and it’s funny to see Carelton try to bring him back. There’s no real money shot, just a hard edit, and that’s the end.

Vince Vouyer knocks on a door, and it’s James Bonn’s warehouse, and the two start to talk. It’s Bonn’s long lost brother. The two go back to meet a guy that looks very menacing. He looks like The Kingpin of some crime syndicate and says that he will give Jimmy and his brother a chance to prove himself with a job.
After the trio talk, we are taken to a bar. There’s Randy West making out with some beautiful women.

Nadia Moore, Tatiana, and Randy West are making out in a bar, and the two brunettes are all over him. They are tanned, skinny, and they passionately take West into the erotic zone. Mind you, this is only 13 minutes into the movie, and there’s already two sex scenes, so this is not a plot heavy movie, as much as it uses sex as transitions to further the story along. There’s a bad rock soundtrack in the background, and I couldn’t help but laugh at it. Lots of bad percussion, and guitar riffing. West seems to be stuck to a chair while the women continues to grope, kiss, and let him suck. The camera angles are pretty bad here, and there’s a lot of blocking for what most likely was the Cable Television cut. You can’t see one girl blowing west as there’s a cup in the way, a chair strategically placed, and more. IT’s funny to see this, until the director zooms into the action for a spell. Randy West does his normal moves, sweating at one point tremendously, but still keeping it hard, going with straight sex until there’s a point where he slips it in one of the women’s ass. Then there is some anal sex going on, and it’s not half bad, but it certainly doesn’t have the chemistry that you’d want from a more sensual movie. It’s good, I’m not sure which actress gets anal, but she has black nail polish, and really does well here with Randy West. After a lot of anal, West eventually gets a dual hand job from the women, and eventually he cums but doesn’t shoot out, so one of them blows him while stroking and he yells out “DAMNIT”, probably because he doesn’t shoot a load. The best part is afterward they keep playing with him, which is a great overall element and sexual thing that I like, so good for him.

The brothers show up, and they ask what Randy West was doing, and he says he was interviewing a couple of waitresses. In comes a blonde haired woman with leopard print, and she’s fairly attractive. Nothing really to report here, just bad acting, and terrible camera work. Jimmy and his brother talk to her, and Randy West talks about how he they have a job to do, and then they leave.

The director immediately sends us to another sex scene.

There’s techno music playing, and a familiar woman shows up. It’s Ruby, whom I saw work with Julian, and enjoyed. The techno is ridiculous mind you. Ruby has long red hair here, and she’s having sex with Steve Drake. Steve Drake is a famous porno actor and I’ve reviewed several films that he’s been in on this blog. Ruby looks older here, a bit “weathered” if you will, and lacks that intimacy that she once had. She’s not fully shaved, and she’s jaded in this scene at some points. The music really is distracting. The set is a random bedroom scene, nothing special. And the lighting works well here. If you’re a big fan of Steve Drake and you’re a fan of Ruby, this scene may speak to you, but honestly, it’s forced, and the two lack a certain chemistry. Ruby’s teeth also distract me a bit. Eventually Ruby stops receiving oral from Drake to get on top and starts giving him a blow job. This is the most passionate of the scene, and you can tell that Drake is in work mode, not really enjoying the process. Sure, he’s a pro, and Ruby is also a pro, but these two do not have that raging chemistry that you may expect. Then again, maybe you don’t expect anything, and you want to just see pure sex. If that’s the case, this works, and Drake doesn’t use a condom to have sex with Ruby, who has an amazing body, and is definitely hot, and gets wet around the 35 minute mark. The more you watch, the more you get into the scene as she eventually starts screaming, and it’s quite odd. I was starting to wonder if she was really screaming, or it was part of the techno music, because it was very odd to me. Maybe it was all her, I don’t know. Drake does a good job of keeping it in doggy style and getting Ruby to moan a lot. I can certainly appreciate the moaning and screaming of Ruby, and the two seem to finally connect towards the end of the scene, with Drake cumming on Ruby’s pubic hair. She screams into orgasm as Drake pulls out and lets it all spill.

Moving forward, in comes the brothers with a gun to Drake’s head. They said that they want their money, and that they’ll give the dude 24 hours. Meanwhile, Jenna Jameson picks up the phone and tells the kingpin that the dudes didn’t kill Drake. He gets mad, and tells her to do the job.

Meanwhile, Vince Vouyer goes to the back of Randy West’s bar, and there’s Sindee Coxx. The two start to make out after arguing a little.

Sindee Coxx and Vince Vouyer start to make out, and then have sex. Sindee Coxx is a tall, blonde haired woman, and she’s one of the starts that I remember most. She doesn’t have huge breasts, but she has a beautiful face, and a classic “California” look. The two start to really get into making out, while a soundtrack plays of yet another techno song. The electronic music in this movie is better than most of the sex that I’ve seen thus far. Coxx moves fast, removing Vouyer’s clothing, in a dark basement, and starts to blow him. You see her eye’s, which are beautiful, before the camera shows you exactly what she is doing with Vouyer’s penis. There’s a lot of attention paid to the eyes of Coxx and not necessarily to the extreme action at times. I like her eyes so much, and she doesn’t take her clothes off right away, making this scene a stand out for the movie. Coxx has long black boots on, and the two have sex on a brown couch. They go through multiple scenes, Coxx moans, the two sweat, and you can tell that they actually have some sort of chemistry together. The director doesn’t make this sterile. There’s no wiping the sweat, there’s just pure eroticism, making this the best scene in the movie by far. Coxx isn’t fully shaved, Vouyer stays hard throughout, and her moans go alongside with the movements. Eventually Coxx wants Vouyer to cum on her, and he obliges by finishing on her chest. Despite the techno that was drilling my cerebellum, this is one hell of a sex scene, that features a great deal of work from both, and it’s not half bad. It’s the best scene in the movie, no doubt, and Sindee Coxx delivers alongside Vince Vouyer. The music though, geez.

Moving forward, the Kingpin yells at one of his cronies. He yells at him, and then he leaves. The Kingpin is on the phone again, only after Jenna kills a dude with a knife for being a cop. Then we go to another part of a warehouse, and it’s the Kingpin. He shows up and says, “we gotta go”.

The final sex scene once again features terrible techno music. However, this time around it has Jenna Jameson and Sindee Coxx having lesbian sex. The two women are really into each other because every position they put themselves in, they moan, and the director catches sweat, cum, and more. These two get so wet, the liquid glistens in the lights of the camera. Done in a red orange hue, the two women really go all out with tongues, fingers, and the likes. I’m not sure if they are really into one another, or they just had a great moment, but the scene is all lesbian sex with two hot blondes. It’s a knockout scene for fans of Jenna Jameson and Sindee Coxx.

After they have sex, in comes Vince with a gun, and Sindee confronts him. She asks where her brother is, and has to be told that he has been killed. The worst acting ever occurs, here, and the plot continues to thicken. Turns out that Vince is a cop. The Kingpin wants everyone dead. Vince shows up at Randy West’s bar and starts shooting up the place, and that’s how the movie ends. He gets his revenge, or something, I don’t know.

I give “Betrayed” a 3 out of 5.

I can’t give this movie any more of a rating because it only has a few good scenes. No, I take it back, it only has one great scene, and the rest is quite bad. If you’re a collector and wants to have all of Jenna Jameson’s scenes, then you should buy “Betrayed”. However, if you don’t, then you’ll only really love the Ruby scene, or the Sindee Coxx scene. Other than that, this movie is plagued by annoying music, and lackluster acting, and performance sex from the rest of the cast. It’s a solid 3 if you ask me, and of course, you didn’t.

You can purchase “Betrayed” from 1996, starring Jenna Jameson by clicking here. It’s worth it for collectors, and fans of the cast, so go get it. 15 minutes free streaming too, why not indulge a little?

Babewatch 8 (1998) Review

Babewatch 8 (1999) DVD Cover

In the past of this blog, we have reviewed the series “Babewatch”, simply because I was able to get copies of it. Today, we are going back to the series, this time with “Babewatch 8” which came out in 1998. This was directed by Buck Adams, and was also known as “Babewatch: Hardcore Beach”. The movie had gone through 8 freaking sequels before getting here, and well, let’s just say that the quality was going down fast. I guess you can’t really say much about that, since this is porno after all. I do recall seeing many of these films on the Spice Network, but I don’t remember if this particular one was there. The movie stars Raquel Devine, Alec Metro, Allysin Chaynes, Mark Vega, Ursula Moore, Barett Moore, Alexandra Nice, Shay Sweet, John Strong and a few others. Most of these men and women, I don’t know, with the exception of Barett Moore and Alec Metro. Moore would be in XPW Wrestling as Veronica Caine, mind you.

The movie begins simple enough, two lifeguards are at sea. They are on a boat, and they are just sailing. The two start by eating a giant submarine sandwich. I kid you not! The two are eating a giant sub ,and they are just at sea, drifting. Then out of the blue Raquel Devine goes up to Alec Metro and says, “I’m so horny after eating that sandwhich”, and in comes the music that sounds a lot like the “Baywatch” music from the hit television show. Devine goes to her knees and here we go, it’s only 3 minutes into the movie and we are getting a sex scene.

Raquel Devine and Alec Metro start having sex on a boat, in the middle of the ocean. There’s no one around, and you hear the loud pop sounds of the synth music. Everything is electronic. You also hear Devine’s moans as she sucks Metro, and I’m wondering if they weren’t dubbed in. I don’t know. Metro gets really hard fast, and Devine seems to genuinely have chemistry with him, as she doesn’t even notice the camera on her, she just goes forward with the process. After the two exchange a great deal of oral, Devine pulls her bathing suit bottom to the side and rides Metro. This scene has her screaming, and hanging onto a rope, while the two are adrift at sea. No condoms here, just straight into the action, with Devine screaming at one point, making this one hell of a scene if you ask me. Of all the movies I’ve reviewed up to this point, I can truly say that Raquel Devine’s the loudest and most energetic that I’ve seen in a long time. She screams with passion, and if it’s overacted, I don’t care, I love the sound, and will come back to see this scene just to see her scream in pleasure. This is a great opening to the eight part of this series. Metro for the most part does well in holding on to Devine’s bouncing body. She’s a big breasted dirty blonde haired woman, and just seems to really get into this more than others I’ve seen. Devine isn’t all the way shaved, and she just takes Metro to the limit in this sex scene that is overly dramatic, and just fun to watch if you’re into blondes and yelling. Devine wins here. After a couple of positions Metro eventually cums in Raquel Devine’s face, and that’s the end of the scene. The two have obvious chemistry, and really go hard in this scene, which is actually one of the better outdoor scenes that I’ve seen since starting reviews on this blog.

After the two have sex, Devine is scared, and wonders if they are lost, and the two run to get the big sandwich, and that’s the end of the scene.

Next up we see a random guy and girl on the beach, they are just walking around. Mark Vega says that there’s 4 hours before they have to report back to the lifeguard station. Allysin Chaynes says that Mark has 1 hour to make her cum, and that’s when the surf music starts and we are into our next scene.

The acting here is hilariously bad, the lighting is terrible, and of course they are outdoors, so why did I even mention lighting? Mark Vega and Chaynes don’t have chemstiry together, it’s by the numbers sex, and it’s done on a rocky part of the beach. Chaynes is a blonde haired California girl, and Vega is a not bad looking average surfer dude. He doesn’t have a huge penis, if you were wondering. Chaynes and Vega have sex, but it’s boring folks. After that first scene, the best thing about this second scene is the fact that there’s a surf rock tune that plays throughout it. The two get down to action, and honestly, it’s boring. There’s not much to the sex. Doggy style, hair pulling, and a little bit of moaning. No condom again, and Chaynes is partially shaved. This may very well get an award for most boring sex scene as I was definitely not getting very excited by the scene whatsoever. The sex looks uncomfortable, the performers don’t have much chemistry, and it just seems like a mechanical romp on some rocks. The surf music is good, so if you want to hear some good overall surf tunes, this is the scene for you. Don’t stay for the sex, stay for the surf rock. Vega seems to almost go soft at one point and for the money shot cums in Chaynes’ face, but it’s lackluster, and you could tell she wasn’t into it, as much as Vega was just trying to go through the motions.

The next scene is all of the lifeguards on a beach. They are all just talking, and looking cool. If you were looking for a breather in the middle of a porno, here you go. You get a full breather, because the following scene is just guys and gals walking on the beach, while a dude is on a jet ski, and that’s it. There’s nothing sexy about it, just random walking on a beach. I’m in the Midwest and it’s snowing, so I just miss the ocean and the beach. Out of the blue, the jet ski guy falls off and looks like he’s in need of help, so the lifeguards rush out and save him. I kid you not, there is a rescue in the midst of this porno. I wanted to slam my head into my desk, but then again, I remembered, that’s part of the story, which is a good thing, right? Awesome! A story with my porn.

That scene ends and we are taken to a gym where Buck Adams is working out. Out comes Zoe and Ursula Moore and Zoe. Zoe is a tall blonde, and Ursula is a tall brunette. Buck Adams looks like he is out of the 1970s, and well, is an older type of guy.

The trio talk, then get to the sex. This is a bit more passionate because the music is more of a piano jazz song than surfer rock. Ursula, Zoe and Buck Adams go through the motions of a threesome. Adams, for being an older guy, gets rock hard and lets the women blow him simultaneously. There is a condom in this scene. Adams has sex with both women, while on a workout bench. Meanwhile one of the women stays on his face, he lets another bounce on him. It’s a sweaty, sexy, sensual scene, and it makes up for the second scene that had no major chemistry. While this doesn’t have a lot of chemistry to start, it certainly gains momentum over time. The scene ends with Buck Adams cumming on the two women’s faces, and that’s it. It’s not a big load, and it looked like the scene was edited to have Adams come back to the scene because he either came too early or there was a split in the production. Whatever the case is, you get a full finish, and that’s it. This is not a long scene, but it’s sensual, and it fits the whole focus of the film, and well it’s good for what it is.

After the scene ends, we are back on the beach. The main focus here is on training, and it’s boring. The scene then moves to a party scene, and it’s the lifeguards just hanging out by a pool and dancing a bit.

Sensual music plays and it’s Barett Moore and Arnold’s turn to heat things up. Moore gets really wet at one point, and has truly sensual moans as Arnold goes through the motions of foreplay, and pleasuring with fingers and tongue. Moore is responsive, and this scene gets a little bit of charm with the realism that the two share, as this is filled with real sexual chemistry. The music is soft, sensual, and this scene almost feels like a guide for married couples, than a porno. The two share this raw sensuality together, and it’s quite fascinating to see. Moore is known as Veronica Caine, as well, so if you’re looking to see her in action, here she is, in a very interesting, erotic scene that looks like a couple going through the motions of a good sex routine. A condom comes on, and Arnold goes through the motions of sex, giving Moore all he’s got, and it’s not a bad scene. It’s safe, it’s sexy, it’s what you’d expect from a decent porno. The music is sensual, the sounds are real, and you can definitely catch yourself losing yourself in the scene a little. The money shot comes with Arnold cumming on Moore’s chest, and that’s it.

There’s an odd edit in this movie, where the director cuts from Barett Moore and Arnold, and takes you to see Alexandra Nice and John Strong having sex in another part of the backyard. The sun is rising and the two are having sex, and it’s here that you get another money shot, and it’s John Strong on Alexandra Nice’s chest for the finish. It’s random, but the director must’ve wanted to squeeze in both scenes into one, and it doesn’t really work.

Up next we see Shay Sweet walking around, then coming to a random apartment. It’s a blonde haired woman in an apartment with a lot of mirrors. It’s here that Tony Martino and Shay Sweet have sex. Shay is a thin, tanned, platinum blonde and with Tony goes through the motions of sex. It’s not the most erotic of scenes, but the sensual music plays on as the two have sex. It’s a standard sex scene, and honestly, it just lacks chemistry throughout. There is a point where Sweet does in fact have a real orgasm, and that’s interesting to see as you can tell she gyrates and contracts on Martino’s motions. Other than that, this is a mechanical scene that is just pornographic in nature. It’s ok at best. If you’re really into skinny, small breasted blondes, then maybe this scene will do a lot for you. The moans towards the end just seemed forced, and when Tony is ready to finish he yells out, “quick quick quick”, and then cums on Sweet’s face, and that’s it. The best part of the scene is the cum shot where Sweet then blows Martino after the fact, which is always a sexy move if you ask me.

We move forward to a scene where Raquel Devine and Dave Hardman are just walking around. Then out of the blue a blanket comes down and the two get into the motions of sex. Devine here isn’t as into it as she was in the first scene, but it works. There’s an alternative, grunge rock tune to the action, while the two start to go at it. There’s no condoms here again, and Hardman looks very familiar. Devine is loud again, but honestly, isn’t as good as the first opening of this movie. While this is a functional sex scene, and Devine gets really wet at one point, it just lacks that same gusto that the opening sequence had. Devine, for her work, is loud, and really gets into the work, which is nice, but Hardman lacks the Metro touch, and that’s ok, but it’s different. After going through some positions on the beach, Hardman can’t hang any longer and he eventually cums. He cums in Devine’s mouth as she sucks him off, and that’s it, she even looks to almost swallow at one point, but doesn’t. That’s the end of the movie, and the end of the scene.

I give “Babewatch 8” a 3 out of 5.

After the first scene, this movie goes downhill fast. Devine is the star of this movie, and her opening scene with Alec Metro, which was great. I loved that opener, but honestly, I wouldn’t put too much stock in this movie unless you’re a collector. If you want all of the “Babewatch” movies, then this is a must own, but other than that, it’s a far cry from the first one which I reviewed on this website.

You can purchase “Babewatch 8” by clicking here, and enjoy that opening scene. Get 15 minutes of FREE VOD here as well. 

The Shark (1999) Review

The Shark (1999) DVD Cover

The smooth jazz opening from Wicked greeted me for a trip back to 1999. The movie in question today is, “The Shark”, and it stars Nina Hartley, Serenity, Evan stone, Alex Sanders, Mickey G, Bridgette Kerkove and many others. I was surprised by the high quality introduction, with some good music for a change. The videography is done by Jake Jacobs, editing by Donald O’Brien, written by Patti Rhodes, and directed by F.J. Lincoln. This is a higher budget film than I’m used to reviewing, and it’s kind of an exciting thing to get a higher budget 1990s movie. I call it a movie because the music is done well, the film grain is there, and it is definitely more than just a random gonzo porno, which I’m all about. There’s a story, and it opens with a poker scene, and some interesting music. An underground poker game starts, and we see our stars playing, nothing crazy, right? Nope.

“The Shark” starts with a bunch of guys playing poker, and two women looking at one another. This is Nina Hartley and Serenity. They look at one another and they leave the poker table. They exchange a few words in the bathroom, and Nina gets on her knees and starts to give Serenity oral. I can say this much about Nina Hartley, she’s amazing, and she knows what’s she is doing, because she really gives it to Serenity, in what seems to be a natural sequence of lesbian sex. Serenity is an up and comer, while Hartley is a legend. The two are blonde haired, fit women, and here you see a lot of oral and the use of a toy, with Serenity orgasming for real, and Nina Hartley looking amazing. I would love to meet her one day, I bet she has some stories to tell. This isn’t a long scene. The music is funny, as it sounds like big band Las Vegas style. The two go back and forth giving each other kisses and oral, and eventually finish, and that’s that. This is a hot scene if you like lesbian sex, and if you love the actresses, then you’re going to enjoy this somewhat short scene.

When the sex is done, we get back to a poker game, and it’s not that great. It’s just a random game, and everyone is winning and losing. The story goes, that Mickey G is running out of money. Mickey leaves the game, and then goes home. He is wishing he could get more money, but instead just paces as Serenity sits in a weird looking chair. Mickey G then wants to play Serenity in a game of poker. She goes to sleep, and the next scene features Serenity showing up to the poker house and winning big.

The sun comes up, and we are back at the house where Mickey G. is just playing solitaire and trying to just relax. In comes Bridgette Kerkove and Ginger Paige. The two women give Mickey G. one hell of a ride. We then get a full sexual romp with Mickey G. Bridgette Kerkove and Ginger Paige, and it’s not half bad. One blonde and one burnette, and we get an interesting focused sex scene with some synth rock. Mickey G. seems to have a hadr time getting hard at first, going soft with the initial blow job, and it’s kind of odd. The director wisely shifts gears, and you are directly placed into the sex, where Mickey finally is hard and going through doggy with one of the women. Mickey wears a condom and enters one of the women, the music shifts to a techno beat, and this becomes a standard sex scene. It’s not as passionate as the other stuff I’ve seen Mickey in, but it works for this scenario. There’s not much chemistry between the actors, and it’s a bit telling. There is an anal sequence, and at that point things get a little louder. If you’re a fan of anal, then you’ll like how this sequence ends, as Mickey gets his rhythm and really does well towards the end of the scene, eventually cumming and rubbing his member on the blonde, but not putting himself back in, making it an ok scene.

UP next we see Serenity winning a big load at the poker table. She complains that she wants to get into bigger action. She then walks towards another table and sits down. She wants higher stakes. And she starts to jump into a table that is higher ranked.

Moving along, Serenity goes back to the house. Evan stone and Nina Hartley introduce themselves to Serenity, but after some time, you end up going to the bedroom. In the bedroom Nina Hartley and Evan Stone start making out. This leads to Nina taking off her lingerie, keeping her heels on and blowing Stone. Evan Stone really gets hard here, and Hartley is one of the classic porno stars that looks amazing for her age. If you’re a fan of hers, you’ll love her work here as Stone can barely keep without cumming at various stages. The foreplay isn’t long as Evan Stone drives himself into Nina in missionary position and then some. He has a condom on, but you don’t see him put it on. She gets really wet and moans a great deal, as Stone throws down his classic moves. It’s a straightforward hard sex scene, with Stone cumming on Hartley’s back and butt, and that’s that. Not a great scene, but it did start hot. He slaps his penis on Nina’s but and causes her to scream, and than that’s that.

We move along to Mickey G. waiting outside of a lounge begging for another shot at the deeper table. Alex Sanders says that he can’t let her borrow the money, except, maybe sex. So the two engage some sex, and that’s the next scene.

Serenity and Alex Sanders start to make out in the lounge, and that leads to sex. It starts with Serenity giving Sanders a blow job, and getting really into it, then Sanders fingering her. The two have a bit of chemistry together, which makes this scene stand out amidst the others. You also get romantic music to score the scene. It feels more like a Hollywood production than a porno, which is always a good thing when it comes to porno. Sanders is completely shaved, Serenity’s dirty blonde long hair reaches down to her lower back, and she is truly a curvaceous blonde. Serenity really gets into it at one point and cums on Sanders’ fingers and that’s the hottest part of this scene. Her moans are genuine, and she contracts with real orgasms. Eventually a condom comes on and the two engage in a nice romp. The setting of a bar next to a pool table is good, and the sex is dynamic, with Serenity wearing black heels, and just getting into the action. She looks kind of like the girl next door, but with a twist, and Sanders looks like a rocker. The two go forward in some nice back and forth. Eventually Sanders cums on her face, and that’s the end. This is a much more romantic scene than I thought it would be, and it turned out great.

Up next, Serenity gets a chance at playing with the big boys of poker. They go through some motions, and then leaves Sanders and Tracy Love alone. That leads to another sex scene.

Tracy Love is a short haired busty blonde, and Alex Sanders is the same dude that you already saw. The two make out on the top of a bar, and Love really gets into the action right away. She looks like Sunny from WWE at one point. Tracy Love and Alex Sanders go through a hot, hard scene here. This is done in a bar, on top of the bar itself and it starts with kissing than oral fast. Love is shaved, and she gets really wet really fast, and things go smoothly for the most part. This is a much harder scene than the first one was, and it’s interesting to see. Alex Sanders really goes in hard with Tracy Love here. The scene is fast, and hard, with a focus on anal at one point. He slowly drives it in, then goes to town with Love screaming at one point. He eventually cums on her pubic mound and that’s it. This was a very fast scene, with a lovely girl, and Sanders playing a good role overall.

The movie continues, and it’s the end. Mickey G thanks Serenity for winning the big poker game and squaring all the money with Sanders. The two start to make out in a bathroom, and you know that this is the end of movie. Serenity and Mickey G. start to make out, and then undress, going into a passionate love making scene, that is the signature for Wicked. The two step into a hot tub, and oral commences. Serenity blows Mickey and this time he’s hard nearly immediately. He starts giving her oral, and she’s shaved, and gets really wet really fast. The two obviously have some chemistry together and it shows. She moans a great deal. Mickey puts on a condom and the two have sex on the tub, in the tub, and through multiple positions. The bathroom looks like a major vegas suite, and there’s a techno beat with a singer underneath the moaning and the groaning. This is an above average scene with the two actually having some chemistry. It’s interesting to see them work through the motions of sex here and definitely something that you would love if you’re a fan of either performers. I’m not a big fan of Serenity, but she’s hot enough to make these scene interesting. Mickey G tries to hold on for a lot of the scene, nearly cumming several times, but eventually holds on to finally cum for a money shot. The money Shot features Mickey G cumming on serenity’s face and that’s the end of the movie. Serenity is a good looking dirty blonde haired woman, and seems to enjoy this scene most.

The movie ends with Serenity winning the World Championship of Poker, and that’s about it. Nothing too crazy, and nothing too grand. The movie finishes off with the credits, and it’s not half bad if you ask me.

I give “The Shark” a 3 out of 5.

I can’t give it more than 3 because of the condom use, which isn’t seen being put on, and the lackluster enthusiasm on several of the scenes. While there are a few scenes that are very good, the sets are done well, and there’s a decent story, the performances aren’t that titillating, so I have to give this a 3. Hey, if you’re a fan of Serenity, you’ll love this one, but if you’re not, you may find this to be passable at best.

You can order “The Shark” on DVD by clicking here, and streaming it as well with 10 minutes free!

Ramb-ohh! (1986) Review

Ramb-Ohh! (1986) VHS Cover

There are a lot of parodies of modern cinema. Many of them become porno movies, and today we are going to go back to a movie that was directed by a guy named Adam. This was released I n1986, and it is a movie that is a complete parody of the classic Rambo Franchise. The movie starts simple enough, and it is definitely one of the better movies to have a parody element to it, although, it’s still a porno. This was definitely meant to be seen on the big screen, as there is better acting, film grain, and a plot that involves a titular character. The movie today is called “Ramb-ohh!” and it stars Tom Byron, Bunnie Blake, Krista Lane, Ray Wells, Candie Evans, Peter North, and Ray Wells. This is a very 1980s movie as far as women are concerned, as they have big hair, and heels, and look like they just came off the set of a Motley Crue video.

We start the movie with people picking on a soldier, played by Peter North. He is getting called all sorts of names for being in Vietnam. He then steals a motorcycle and just goes along his way. In another scene, we see Tom Byron at a mansion, and some guy that looks like a villain talking on the phone, and the two exchange a few words before Byron goes inside.

The opening sex scene starts at around 5 minutes, and the music is very romantic, soft, and you find two women on a brown couch. One is a blonde, and one is a brunette, and they are simply kissing. Bunnie Blake, and Careena Collins kiss and slowly work through a lesbian opening sequence. The music shifts and in comes a young Tom Byron. I’ve seen more Tom Byron scenes than any other actor in the business at this point, and here he is, throwing down with two women, as they begin to blow him. The two women share his throbbing member, and the music turn sinto a bit more porn-chic element. This is a fast moving scene, mind you, and Byron is just enjoying every minute of getting blown by two beautiful women. This isn’t a long scene, no one is shaved, and Byron goes through both women at one point, before he eventually can’t hold it together, the camera shakes and he cums on the pubic hair of one girl while another gets really close for the money shot in her face, and licks up the cum after the fact. The scene has some good chemistry, and some solid momentum, although the music made me laugh. Not the best scene, but Byron seems to have enjoyed this threesome, and the women weren’t half bad, making it at least passable.

The next scene shows our solider coming up on a van and seeing that there is someone locked inside. He knocks out the two guys outside of the van, and then takes the girl away, saving here.

Another scene shows a couple of con artists trying to get someone to stop along the side of the road. One beats up a driver and then hijacks a car, and a country tune plays. This is comical, and unnecessary. But hey, it’s 1986, and we need a plot to this porno.

Switching ears, Peter North talks to a woman and talks about what is going. My VHS copy of this tape started to mess up a little, but we get more of the story. The woman saved was headed to a brothel, where she had to work against her will. But now she’s saved. As she talks, we are sent to another sex scene, where a man and a brunette with big hair are making out in front of a fireplace.

This scene features Krista Lane and Ray Wells. It’s an average sex scene with a jazzy musical score. No one is shaved again, there’s no condoms, and the two don’t seem to have a lot of chemistry. Lane does most of the work here, although Wells seems to hold off from cumming too fast. This is not a very sexy scene, although it works for what it is. The director does do some good close ups of the action, but there are also edits where you see Wells’ face too long, and then Lane’s body moving, but not penetration. There’s no one sweating here, and it’s apparent that the two are just doing the job, and not really into one another. Eventually Lane starts to really get into it, and moans and nearly screams, as she gets close to orgasm. The money shot occurs when Wells goes Russian with Lane and cums on her neck and chest, although it’s not a big load to speak of, which the director doesn’t even get too close to. It’s a minimal amount of an ender, and Lane doesn’t even seem that excited, making this a dull scene.

The movie then shifts back to Peter North and the woman he saved. She tells him that he needs to go to some building and stop a bomb that is going to go off. After that we see the villains talking to the boss and talking about how the woman they had escaped.

Another scene features the two con men that stole a car, just driving down the road. Then you get aerial shots of old Malibu, California. This is just an odd sequence of movie elements before you get back to Peter North, with a pair of binoculars looking at a house.

Inside the house we get our next sex scene. A jazzy tune starts and you see Careena Collins, Francois, and Ray Wells having a threesome. This is a basic three some, and it appears to have dubbed in sounds. Careena Collins does have a little moaning done here and there, but the tape dub is bad. Francois is funny here, he’s all oiled up, and it’s interesting to see him contrast with Wells. At one point Careena Collins’ has dubed over statements that are not in the same scene, and it’s funny. Then you get male voice overs, making this one of the worst scenes I’ve ever seen. If you like terrible porn, you have to seek out this scene just to laugh at how bad the audio design is. The direction is also clumsy, but the audio is just tremendously bad. The two have sex with the brunette here, and it’s not terrible. There’s a money shot on her breasts, no double penetration or anything like that, just terrible dubbing. I couldn’t believe how bad this scene was. Just horrendous. Wells doesn’t even finish he stays hard after the seen ends, which is odd to me, but hey, that’s porno for you.

The movie moves to Peter North with a gun, then a city scene of Los Angeles from the 1980s. We are then shown two bad guys get beat up by North, and he jumps on the stolen motorcycle and takes off. Our hero finds the house he was looking at and attacks, going inside, and saving a woman that is tied up. They leave the room, and then the scene cuts to another couple having sex.

Candie Evans and Francois have sex on a water bed in this scene. Francois is an oiled up, tanned dude with a bad circumcision. Candie Evans is a blonde haired 1980s pin up looking porno girl. Again, no one is shaved, the two seem to have minimal chemistry, and the music is laughable at times. I did appreciate watching a movie with a waterbed in it. Remember those? I never got to have sex on a water bed, which makes this scene all the more delightful. This is a standard sex scene, but I’m going to go out on a limb and assume Francois did gay porn, because his physique, motions, and overall lack of enthusiasm drives you away from the scene. He’s hard, Evans rides him, but this is as mechanical as two married people having sex after being together for 30 years. It’s not worthy of the porno world if you ask me. The ending of this scene features Evans blowing Francois until he cums, and that’s it. Not a great scene.

Peter North rescues the girl, and then meets the villain of this movie. The two face off, and North throws a knife at the villain! He then falls into a pool, and that’s it. Our hero prevails! It’s not bloody, it’s not action packed, it’s just somewhat boring. Peter North barely works through his lines here, and the bets actor is the non-sexual role that the villain has.

Once the villain is dead, Peter North goes inside to tell Bunnie Blake and she’s spread eagle waiting for him. BUnnie is a blonde haired woman, with curly hair, and Peter North is now a legend. The starting of this final sex scene is all oral. The two taking their time going through the motions of sex, with neither shaved, and no condom in sight. This is another waterbed scene, in the same waterbed that we saw before, with pale walls, and a yellow comforter to boot. The music is a military style drumming which is terrible, and you get close ups of all the action here. As far as Peter North scenes are concerned, this is one of the worst. Sure, Bunnie Blake has some chemistry with him, but it’s not a great scene, as the two are somewhat mechanical. The saving grace of this movie should’ve been a Peter North facial, or big cum shot, but for some reason the director did not focus on that, and we just see a finish with dubbed in moaning, and that’s it. I kid you not.

I give “Ramb-ohh!” a 1 out of 5.

Well, it was bound to happen. I was going to run into a movie that was so awful, I didn’t want to even get hard for it. This is one of those movies. This is the worst porno movie I’ve seen, in terms of sex. Sure, there was some story to it, and there is some production value. However, this is a seriously terrible movie, and if you love bad porno, then you’ll like it. Other than that, this is not one that’s going to make you want to get it on. Unless, you’re a collector of all things Peter North, in which case, go for it.