Friday, January 26, 2018

The Perfect Slut (2005) Review

The Perfect Slut (2005) DVD Cover 
Heading into 2005, going a bit more modern than usual on this website, we are going to discuss “The Perfect Slut”. I didn’t know anything about this movie, and so I was surprised that within 1 minute and 30 seconds Cindy Crawford was talking to the camera and playing with herself. Before getting too far into this one, the stars of this movie include Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Sergio, Tyler Faith, Ashton Moore, Gia Paloma, and others. This is a gonzo movie. I didn’t realize that until I started watching it, and then I looked closer at the box art. This is a Jill Kelly production, but she’s not in it. If you’ve ready anything on this blog, you know that I’m a big fan of Jill Kelly, and would love to meet and interview her. As for this particular movie, it’s her production company, but she’s not doing anything in it. This is a gonzo porno movie, and I don’t like reviewing gonzo movies, but hey, it’s too late now, I have to get started.

The opening scene features Cindy Crawford in what appears to be a bad motel, or a set somewhere in the San Fernando Valley. She starts playing with herself and then in comes Alex Rox, Sergio, and Tyce Bune. This is a fourway sexual romp, and two of the guys aren’t even hard. They struggle to get it up, while two guys are hard. Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Sergio, and Tyce Bune go through some good points overall. Cindy Crawford looks nothing like the super model. She’s a blonde haired, tanned, skinny porno actress, and well, she’s not half bad. If you like blonde haired women, this is going to be your scene, at least in the beginning, as she’s shaved, and she is perfectly tanned, and looks like that California blonde style. Crawford gets wet with some oral, she has a piercing down below, and a landing strip. The guys take turns with her, and she seems to genuinely get into some of the action, moaning, and nearly screaming at one point. There are multiple positions, multiple partner changes, and your classic 4 way sex romp. At one point she asks for anal, and that’s showcased at around 14 minutes into the movie. A few minutes later, there’s a double penetration, and that’s about the best part of the scene. The camera moves back and forth and shows you that this is a set, not a hotel, which is interesting to see. Overall, Crawford’s enthusiasm for this scene makes it worth checking out, as she really gets into the sex, and the guys are there to oblige her requests. The show ends with multiple money shots on her face, and that’s it.

From that scene we are taken to the back of a club. It’s there that two blondes are kissing. A techno beat starts and the two start to get a bit more extreme. The two women, are Ashton Moore and Tyler Faith. As far as lesbian scenes are concerned, this is not half bad. They are both thin, tall California blondes. They go slowly, and they are sensual throughout their scene. It’s an interesting scene and one that is definitely going to attract those that like blondes. Both women are shaved, both are toned, tanned, and seem to like what is going on. The lighting is dark, the music is bothersome, but the sex is above average. What else can you ask for?

The sequence ends, and we are taken to another scenario. This one features Kurt Lockwood, a toned guy with an average penis, Cindy Crawford, and Summer Sweet. Again, we are treated to blondes. It’s two blondes working over Lockwood, and a jazzy, new school beat. Kurt looks like a surfer dude, and he looks about as smart as a box of cement. No offense, but it’s just a funny looking guy, with an average sized member. The music doesn’t fit the scene, and the set looks like the lobby of an old hotel. The women immediately start working over Lockwood, giving wet blow jobs, and kisses. No condoms are in place, and the two women start things off with reverse cowgirl, taking turns. The new wave jazz was annoying here, but the sex is fine. Two blonde haired women that you’d find on the streets of Santa Monica, near the pier. If you’re into tanned, skinny, blonde haired women, then this scene will really do it for you. As for me, it’s average. The women are shaved, they seem semi-into it, and Lockwood does good not to cum too early and he really pushes into both women. Lockwood just looks like he’s going through the motions, and the women aren’t that into him, but they are doing the job. Sure it’s sexual, but it’s far from being passionate. However, as far as eye candy is concerned, the women are hot, and the more you watch, the more they tempt you. The scene ends with a money shot, and it’s not that great. Lockwood is delayed in finishing himself off, but the women make due and suck it dry, making it the best part of the scene. Other than that, this isn’t that great.

The scene shifts, as is the standard for gonzo porno movies, and it’s Alexis Amore, Charmane Star, and Alex Sanders hanging out at a strip club. This appears to be the champagne room, and while Chris Rock said that there’s no sex in the champagne room, this trio is ignoring it. The two women have long brunette hair, and medium tanned skin. Sanders has a skinny, rocker type body, and a condom is used in this scene. The two women pounce on him, blowing him, then getting on top for a ride. Sanders takes turn with both women, one had a piercing of a diamond on her lower parts, and then after some back and forth, Sanders gives the women a money shot, although he struggles to let it out and it doesn’t seem to come through with much vigor. The women blow him after the fact, and that’s the end. I like the finish, anytime an actor cums and then gets a blow job, lucky bastard.

And now, another sex scene. This time around there’s an alternative rock tune playing in the background. This set looks a lot like a college dorm room, and it’s a boy girl scene. This scene features Gia Paloma and Christian XXX. Gia moans through the kissing portions of this, and Christian gets hard fast, so Gia jumps on for a blow job. There’s some blocking that goes on here, the same that you’d expect from old Cable television porno, and it’s funny to see. Gia goes deep here, and actually seems to have some passion for what she’s doing. That makes this scene a lot better than the previous one. The two start having sex, and that passion seems to dwindle a little. Gia does moan while in different positions, and eventually in anal, but Christian seems to be in work mode and losing his erection at one point. It also looks to be painful at one point, and the signs of a penis that has been pumped comes through. Christian eventually cums on Gia’s back and butt and the scene ends.

The final scene, we are taken to a set with good lighting and Cindy Crawford talking. She starts off by stripping, and then a group of five guys show up. She is enthusiastic about what is to come, and well, here we go, the final scene begins at around one hour and 10 minutes. This scene features Cindy Crawford, Alex Rox, Anthony Hardwood, guy, Sergio, and Tyce Bune. Crawford immediately starts to suck everyone off, and no dick is giant, or monster in size. The guys that aren’t getting blown are just masturbating, trying to get hard, and one guy cums too early. The sex begins, and it’s standard five way sex, with one guy getting into it, while the others watch, then a DP sequence occurs after some anal, and things really get going. There are no condoms used here. A few of the guys don’t even stay hard for most of the scene. The camera work is not that good here, and the guys go through the motions, including several DP moments, but honestly, it’s not that great. Crawford seems to enjoy it, but at a certain point seems to get bored with the action. She moans, the guys go through th emotions, and she asks them to go slow, but they don’t, and she just takes it. The scene eventually finishes with the guys cumming on Cindy one by one and that’s it. The movie ends and that’s the end of the production.

I give “The Perfect Slut” a 3 out of 5.


Cindy Crawford is a name that I recognize from super models. However, this is not her. This blonde haired woman has a California look to her, and in my younger years would’ve turned me on. Now in my 30s, however, she’s not that great, and the movie seems forced at times. The rest of the scenes are a bit dry, although there are a few moments of enthusiasm. Gonzo porno sucks, and I never liked it. However, there’s enough here for a 3 out of 5, so I handed it down.

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