Turn Up The Heat (1991)

Again we venture to the 1990s, only this time I’m reviewing a movie from 1991. This movie is called “Turn Up The Heat”.  This early movie from the 1990s stars Tom Byron, Charlie Waters, Bobby Soxx, David Sanders, Savannah, Tony Montana, Nina DePonca, Don Fernando, and Charlie Waters. There’s no hiding this one, it gets into the hardcore right away. It starts with a 1980s haired blonde woman with a black dildo, and she just gets it on for the camera. She’s not shaved, she is very much a 1980s looking actress, and I can only assume it is Charlie Waters, who is joined by Tom Byron after she goes to work with her dildo in and out. 

Charlie Waters is straight out of the 1980s and well, so is Tom Byron. The music isn’t bad though, classic porn cinema jazz. The two work well enough, but it is definitely not a great sex scene to introduce us to “Turn up The Heat”. 

At one point the dildo gets thrown out, and the camera zooms in to introduce us to another part of the movie.  Some dude steals the dildo, and then goes and uses it, and we are into the second scene. Bobby Soxx is a nice blonde, and David Sanders is a mullet wearing random dude, and the two have minimal chemistry. I had to fast forward it, it was bad. 

The best scene in the movie, and that’s not saying a whole lot is a scene that features Savannah. Savannah and Tony Montana get physical, and it’s the best part of this movie. She looks amazing, and Montana enjoys the process alongside her. I don’t get the hype surrounding Savannah, but in this one she does look amazing. Montana does well here, and Savannah takes it, but it’s definitely not one of the more memorable scenes. She doesn’t seem to have a lot of passion here, and it shows. However, she’s such a beauty that you want to continue watching just to see what happens, and of course you know. 

Scene 1. Charlie Waters, Tom Byron

Scene 2. Bobby Soxx, David Sanders

Scene 3. Savannah, Tony Montana

Scene 4. Nina DePonca, Don Fernando

Scene 5. Bobby Soxx, Charlie Waters

Things go south fast in this movie, and while there are two more scenes, it’s not that great. Unless you’re really into floral patterned couches and blondes. The ending scene isn’t terrible, and a cameo from Ron Jeremy makes it kind of funny. Ron has a non-sex role here, and he just happens to be on set for a black dildo to get thrown into the air, and he catches it. It’s one of those things that you only see if you’re watching the whole movie, so there you go suckas!

I give “Turn Up The Heat” a 1 out of 5. 

Wild Widow (1995) Review

Another 1990s movie? Yeah, well what can I say, I’m always watching something in the 1990s and today we are going to look into a movie that features some heavy hitters yet again. The name of the movie is, “Wild Widow”, and it stars Anna Malle, Hank Armstrong, Jeanna Fine, Steve Hatcher, Morgan Fairlane, Rick Masters, Alexandra Silk, Guy DiSilva, Raven McCall, Don Fernando, Ron Jeremy, and Santino Lee. 

 

The plot revolves around Jeanna Fine’s character, she has lost her husband and doesn’t know what to do with herself now. She has sex with her friends, her right hand man, and anyone else that is available. 

 

Scene 1. Anna Malle, Hank Armstrong  

Scene 2. Anna Malle, Jeanna Fine

Scene 3. Jeanna Fine, Steve Hatcher

Scene 4. Morgan Fairlane, Rick Masters

Scene 5. Alexandra Silk, Guy DiSilva

Scene 6. Jeanna Fine

Scene 7. Raven McCall, Don Fernando, Ron Jeremy, Santino Lee

 

Instead of going play by play, this time around I’m just going to point out that some of these scenes are boring and some are actually quite good. Anna Malle has a sense of enthusiasm that you miss in a lot of actresses. She really goes at it, and while Hank Armstrong isn’t that great, her work is not half bad. 

 

Fans of Jeanna Fine will love her work here, as she and Anna Malle make for a very good set of scenes. However, that’s where things really start to fall apart. Aside from scenes featuring Fine and Malle, you’re not going to get much. Alexandra Silk does anal, but other than that, this is a production that falls flat. 

 

I give “Wild Widow” a 2 out of 5 

Blue Movie (1995) Review

One of the best movies in the lexicon of adult cinema is that of Blue Movie. This was released in 1995, and it stars a lot of talent from the era. “Blue Movie” came out in 1995, and it stars Rebecca Lord, Steven St. Croix, Jenna Jameson, Tera Heart, Alex Sanders, Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi, Lana Sands, Jeana Fine,  TT Boy, Jenna Jameson, and Jordan St. James. The movie is shot on film, and the sets are all very well designed. This is an expensive adult movie, and it shows from the start to finish, including the soundtrack which features full orchestral moments. 

The movie opens up in a doctor’s office. A psychiatrist is talking to Steven St. Croix and she wants to get to the bottom of why he dresses like a woman. He says a few things, but the doctor wants more. 

Scene 1. Rebecca Lord, Steven St. Croix

Rebecca Lord is beautiful, has brown hair that is tied up as she is playing a doctor, and is not all the way shaved. She gets eaten out by Steven St. Croix to start the sex, and it’s a good bit of cunnulingus to begin the movie. The set design here is good, the soundtrack is fine, and we move forward into our X-rating fast. However, this doesn’t move forward into sex, instead it moves into the second scene, a cut away to something a bit different. 

Scene 2. Jenna Jameson

The movie shifts gear and while the credits roll we see a nude Jenna Jameson in a bed with fog machines going, candlelight, and her hands moving through to feel herself. This is contrasted with artsy scenes that have nothing to do with the plot, including blue balls that seem to talk to her. She plays with the blue ball and that’s that, an oddly erotic sequence without sex, as we get forward progress to a wake up. 

Plot point: Jenna takes a phone call, and she is told that she is supposed to be getting a story about a random dude. The story is about the “Legend of the Golden Oyster”, and the editor is yelling, and eating pickles of all things. Jenna Jameson’s character is in charge of getting a story, and that’s where the plot takes us. After getting caught trying to steal some information, we are taken to a backstage area, and the plot continues with the newspaper story thing. Make it through this, and you’re treated to the next sex scene, which seems to show a movie within a movie, and away we go again. 

Scene 3. Tera Heart, Alex Sanders

Tera Heart is just hanging out, when Alex Sanders shows up. Sanders is in full snowboarding gear while Heart is in heels and a bikini. Heart has brown hair and begins to blow Sanders immediately, giving him a great deal of attention. This starts somewhat timid if you ask me, and Heart’s skills are on display. She’s a thin brunette with nice breasts, and the camera takes time to move closer and further, with cuts highlighting expressions. The set here is that of a ski resort, and the music is orchestral. The two trade a lot of positions and we even get anal at one point, as the two actually seem to have some sort of chemistry. Fans of Heart will love to see her get some, and Sanders does well enough to keep the momentum going. There’s a facial to end things, and techno beats to move along as well. 

Scene 4. Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi

We move to another backstage segment, and this time Dallas Whitacker blows Tony Tedeschi. That’s the crux of this, while Jenna Jameson watches. Dallas is a blonde with an 1980s hair cut, and Tedeschi just receives oral and gets moving forward. This is a simple scene with a blow job at the center of it all. 

Scene 5. Lana Sands, Tony Tedeschi

Moving right along we end up seeing Tedeschi in a bar scene, where he gets blown by Lana Sands. Lana is a brunette that has tan skin, and Tedeschi moves forward with this fast. Sands is pretty, thin, and has natural breasts. The two have sex on the counter of a bar, and the music isn’t too bad. It’s a bit on the soft side, but Lana and Tedeschi go through the motions well enough. Anal occurs at one point, and Tedeschi puts it down with Lana moaning some. The bar background is not that much of a difference maker, and the movie continues with simple sex here. Not many positions, but a lot of close ups especially of the anal. 

Plot point: We get moving forward with the plot, and it’s about the Golden Oyster, as it gives unlimited power to the person that looks into it. The bar scene is just a film within a film, and we are driven to the next scene which is what many are going to be waiting for, and that’s Jenna and TT Boy, which she mentions in her book. 

Scene 6. Jenna Jameson, TT Boy

TT Boy and Jenna Jameson start things off with cunulingus, and then she blows him. If you read her book, then you’ll recall that this is the scene in which TT Boy got paid to climax more than once and she was surprised that he could do it. The overall sequencing here is good, and fans of Jenna are going to love the way the two work together with fast strokes and easy movements. 

Scene 7. Jeanna Fine, Jenna Jameson, Lana Sands

Just when you think you’re getting a story line, the movie moves again to just sex. That’s what the point is of these movies anyway. This time around you see Lana Sands, Jeanna Fine, and Jenna Jameson in a three way lesbian scene. The trio exchange kisses and cunnulingus throughout, while St. croix watches. It’s a tame scene in comparison to others, and it’s a nice change of pace. Nice set here, Roman in style, and we move forward to another scene. 

Scene 8. Dallas Whitacker, Tony Tedeschi

Dallas Whitacker enters and disrobes, then she gets on her knees and blows Tony Tedeschi. There’s not much to this scene in terms of story, the two just go straight forward into sex, and it’s not terrible. Tedeschi is a pro, and Whitacker has a wig on, and the two go through several positions together. The sex is somewhat robotic, and Tedeschi wears a condom for this one, but overall it is an adequate scene, with some nice music to boot. 

Scene 9. Jeanna Fine, Steven St. Croix

Next up we get a similar situation with Jeanna Fine and Steven St. Croix. From a blow job to cunnulingus to sex, we get a straight forward sex scene. It’s robotic, it isn’t that good, and honestly, perhaps the worst of the bunch in terms of sex in this movie. Jeanna Fine is hot, but ST. Croix is just a bit boring to watch here. 

Scene 10. Jordan St. James

The plot moves forward and we have no major continuity. We just go straight into a strip scene with Jordan St. James. Not before we get another look at blue balls, and that’s it. Jordan St. James strips, and well the credits roll. 

“Blue Movie” is a big budget sex movie, and it doesn’t fail to capture the imagination at times. However, in terms of good sex, it just lacks something. Sure, it is good in terms of it being shot on film, and the budget and sets. However, if you’re looking to get off, this is going to distract more than anything. 

I give “Blue Movie” a 3 out of 5. 

Cherry Pie (1994) Review

When I was a teenager I walked under a bridge in Santa Monica, California and found the remnants of a video box. That box was for the cover of today’s movie review, Cherry Pie. This is a famous movie for being an early Jenna Jameson release, and the introduction of Kylie Ireland. It’s the type of movie that collectors want to get their hands on, and people like me want to see uncensored. “Cherry Pie” stars Kim Chambers, Jonathan Morgan, Kylie Ireland, Gerry Pike, Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson, and Nick East. 

The credits roll easily on this movie and we see the names in red. Nothing too fancy here, your standard starting point, and we are led directly into the story. This features a tale like that of Archie Comics. I kid you not, it features Betty, Veronica, and Archie as the main characters. We see Jonathan Morgan with Eva Flowers and Jenna Jameson talking. They are discussing the good old days, and Morgan jumps into a sex story. 

Scene 1. Kim Chambers, Jonathan Morgan

Kim Chambers comes through with a bustline that gets Morgan all at attention. Chambers is a busty blonde with high heels that she keeps on throughout the course of the sex here. Chambers starts with oral on Morgan and you can tell he’s a pro, but he’s not exactly well endowed. He’s adequate here, and shaved, which is something you’ll start to see in the 1990s more often. Chambers and Morgan have sex on a couch, and while it is hardcore, you don’t really get that savage sex that you expect. The two have an adequate romp of sex, before getting a money shot. You don’t get to see a lot of Kim Chambers’ breasts, but she is wearing high heels, so there’s that for ya. Her hair is straight out of the 1980s and by this time Chambers has been around a long time, so of course you expect professionalism, and it shows. 

Plot point: Archie talks with Jughead and Reggie, and they talk about the good old days of college and how the women were. This leads to sex of course, in a non-story point. 

Scene 2. Kylie Ireland, Gerry Pike

Fans of Kylie Ireland will want to see her first major introduction into porn, and that’s what you get here. Kylie Ireland is a busty woman with brown hair here, and she gets ridden quite a bit by Gerry Pike. He is well endowed and the two are shot in a red light. The scene isn’t too much to write home about, and it works well enough. Pike does good with Ireland, and the two enjoy some freedom here, although with multiple positions, and a piano soundtrack, this is not a great scene. Ireland makes it watchable though, she’s always a blast to see. 

Scene 3. Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson

Forget the plot at this point, we don’t get much of it, as the trio of guys talks again. But that moves into Jameson and Flowers, Bettie and Veronica of this movie. The two are completely naked and start going at it together. This is a simple scene with a toy being involved, and the two working with that. If you’re a fan of lesbian sex, this will do the trick, but it’s really just clumsy. This is an adequate scene, but far from what you’d expect. 

Scene 4. Kim Chambers, Nick East

Fast forward through another plot point where the trio are just talking, and you get to see Jughead get in on some action. This time around it’s Kim Chambers again, and she gives a somewhat enthusiastic blow job before she gets on top of East and goes to work. The two have sex on a flowery looking couch, this time with full breasts showing and a good old fashioned momentum stealing sequence. The jazzy music make this interesting, and Chambers is a pro with East providing the pushing for the most part. It’s not a terrible scene, but unless you’re a big fan of Chambers, you’ll probably want to skip this one. 

Plot point: some jazzy music leads us to a discussion with Jonathan Morgan talking to Jameson and Flowers about eating a chocolate cake. I kid you not. It’s here that Bettie and Veronica want to team up with one another to show Archie what he’s missing, and that’s when the trio go to the bedroom for some fun. 

Scene 5. Eva Flowers, Jenna Jameson, Jonathan Morgan

The main event in this movie is a threesome with Jonathan Morgan, Jenna Jameson and Eva Flowers. You get Bettie and Veronica here and of course Archie. Morgan isn’t huge, but you get an early scene with Jenna doing a lot of the heavy lifting here, including blowing Morgan and riding him all the same. This is not a long scene, and the jazzy music make it kind of interesting. It’s adequate at best, and you will get off if you try hard, but the scene is somewhat limited with camera work that leaves a lot to be desired, and well, a lackluster throw of sex. It’s a threesome, but not one that you’re going to remember, unless you’re a collector and want that early Jenna Jameson scene. 

Overall “Cherry Pie” is not a great movie at all. The plot is not there, despite the interesting cover, and well, who watches for the plot anyways? Besides me and this blog. 

I give “Cherry Pie” a 1 out of 5. 

Texas Crude (1995) Review

We go back to the 1990s, and this time around we are looking at a movie that was distributed by Nitro Productions, and directed by Charles Rothstein. The movie stars Houston, Alec Metro, Valeria, Marc Wallice, Tom Byron, Vince Vouyer, Dallas Whitacker, Barbi Bond, Keisha, and Mike Horner. The movie is about a bar in Texas, and a wealthy tycoon wants to buy in. Will the bar sell out or will they stay put, on top of a fortune of ore? The movie has a simplified plot, and really is paper thin as per usual, and to be honest, it’s not well written. However, unlike my previous reviews, I take a look at the sex more than the story, because no one seems to care about the story, and fast forward to the raunch, right? Today we look at "Texas Crude".

The first thing you should know about this movie is that Houston is starring in it, that same Houston that did 620 men in the world’s biggest gang bang. The movie opens up with a simple strip tease, and we get moving fast into the nudity. Of course, that’s what you came for, right? 

Plotting starts with a group of lawyers in a room, being requested to purchase land that is sitting on a great deal of ore. The group adjourns, and we get moving straight forward into a hard wipe, and a bedroom scene. The room looks like a random hotel, and it isn’t that attractive, but it’s where we start with the sex. 

Scene 1. Houston, Alec Metro

Houstin has her hair in braids, like that of the Perfect 10 movie. If you’re familiar with that classic, then you know what her hair looks like here. ALec Metro wears a suit that is too big for him, but it starts to come off fast with Houston. Houston is a blonde with big breasts, and a thin waist. This is before she had a lot of other work done, so she is still somewhat young in this scene, and Metro is a veteran of sorts. 

The scene is somewhat standard, with the most provocative of moments the oral sequences with Metro getting blown, where as Houston getting eaten out isn’t exactly the best. She’s shaved, in that 1990s style, so if you’re a fan of that, you’ll likely be turned on here. However the sex is rudimentary, lacking that passion, it’s two machines, no passion, and well, somewhat interesting for the longer shots. This is standard sex, porno sex, multiple positions, and a money shot, no condom, and just a finish. If you’re a fan of Houston, then you may like this scene, otherwise, it’s just not that grand. Even if she is hot, there’s something missing. 

Metro’s script is hilarious, if you’re watching this for entertainment, he spews a few one liners, here and there, which are funny to consider, but overall just over the top. 

Plot Point 

The plot moves forward and we get more of the story. Two guys are looking to make a deal to buy out the owners. In between that we get to see the hiring process of a strip club. That leads to a stern conversation in the back of the club. Ms. Dallas Delight says Texas Crude is not for sale. The crux of this plot revolves around the buying of a strip club. There’s some seriously bad acting, bad jokes, and simplified lines. 

Scene 2. Valeria, Marc Wallice, Tom Byron

Next up we get a threesome in which Byron and Wallice are sent to arrest Valeria, a busty blonde. The fun starts with kissing in a backstage area of what is supposed to be the strip club/bar. Byron gets blown first, and that’s where your x-rating comes into play. This is a scene with minimal music, and a bit of sound overall. The sound design here is not half bad, but the lack of music is a bit odd considering this is a feature. There’s a good deal of foreplay for the plot, but once the sex gets moving forward, Valeria and the boys do a good job of making moves. Fans of close up sex will enjoy seeing the penetration go full force with Byron taking the lead overall. At one point Wallice is soft, so he’s not in frame. Valeria does anal after a certain point, and while there’s no double penetration, there’s enough to get you started up. Anal is somewhat limited before a money shot occurs, and she gets it on her face and pubic mound, which is not completely shaved. 

Plot point: Wallice and Byron cum and are busted by Dallas, she warns the cops that they are in trouble and will have to answer to a higher authority unless they scram. 

Meanwhile, Houston wants to dance and approaches Dallas and asks to get started asap. 

Scene 3. Dallas Whitacker, Vince Vouyer

Vouyer watches Dallas dance, and eventually gets in good with her, and the next sex point begins. Dallas is a nice, tight blonde with medium size breasts, and Vouyer is a pro here. The setting here is a bar, right on the stools and counter. The two proceed into oral, and while it’s not epic, it is serviceable. Dallas is ok, she has pretty looks, and gives head with slight enthusiasm, but you can tell that the chemistry here is lost somewhere. They are limited to how many positions they can go here, so you can expect limited sex, doggy, cowgirl, and the use of the bar stools and counters. Dallas has a nice body, but this is not a great sex scene if you ask me. It’s formulaic, and Vouyer even looks bored at one point. There’s a money shot and then that’s it, it’s all over.

Plot Point: Houston talks to Mr. BIg about buying the bar. We then move forward to the stage where two ladies are dancing and getting clapped for and cheered for. This has shotty camera work, slow motion, and piped in claps. It’s pretty lousy, but the set isn’t too bad here so that’s a plus. 

Scene 4. Dallas Whitacker, Houston

For fans of lesbian sex, the movie throws in this little tidbit. You get Houston with Dallas, and the two immediately start getting naked and going for it. You can tell that they are not fully bisexual, at least not with one another as the scene is slow, methodical, and somewhat tame in comparison to the rest. It’s very lackluster in terms of lesbian sex, and while it will get you there, it’s definitely lacking. Again there’s no soundtrack here, just the moaning, and mostly oral as you’d expect. This is a scene you’d probably fast forward, it lacks chemistry. 

Scene 5. Barbi Bond, Keisha, Mike Horner

Moving along, we are in the middle of another scene, the plot jumps to sex, and we get the final sex encounter. This time around it’s Barbi Bond, Keisha, and Mike Horner. Horner is a veteran of this stuff, and the two women are a dichotomy for you. One is a tight blonde and one is a brunette with nice hips and curly hair. The sex starts quickly with a blow job to horner, and then goes into lesbian sex. Lots of kissing and oral before Horner jumps in to have sex with the women and it’s not half bad. It’s a good ender, but it definitely is missing something. There’s a cum shot on Barbi Bond’s rear, and that’s it for the sex, a short sex scene to level things out. 

The plot thickens when Dallas and Houston catch Horner’s character. Horner is married so gets to moving along, and then we get the final moment, where Dallas and Houston breaks the news to Mr. Big, he gets the shaft and doesn’t get to buy the club. 

Texas Crude is a by the numbers porno movie, and one that I wouldn’t recommend. If you’re a big fan of Houston, then there you go, but other than that, this is somewhat mediocre and just kind of tiresome. 

I give “Texas Crude” a 1 out of 5 stars.